Women know what sacrifice means when it comes to relationships, marriage, family. They simply do not accept the idea that some things need to wait until tomorrow to be finished because they know just how much needs to be done every day.
They do so much that they are ready to take on the world if needed for their family, for the men they love, and for the children they live for. They love fiercely and sacrifice everything they have unconditionally. They are the heroes who quietly run the world.
And if you are one of these women, then we know how every morning feels and how the thoughts of whether you will make it through the day simply tear you apart. We know how little you are appreciated for your daily feats of heroism that so many take for granted.
But how much are you, dear husband, aware of this? And yes, it is very hard to know what you can do to help her out. Perhaps the most important thing you should always bear in mind that the path of living a life together means that everything should be done together to some extent.
Everyone has their own role in the relationship, but what you need each other most for is to help each other when you fall, to support each other and stand tall together, to hold each other and never let go, to give comfort when life is too difficult to bear.
And it is very easy to help your wife out – it is the simple things full of affection that matter the most. All she needs is for you to be more aware of her sacrifices and give her the support to endure all the toils that she is going through.
1. Be mindful of what she does
It does not matter if she goes to work or stays at home. What matters is whether you are aware of what she does during the day, how much her to-do list weighs on her shoulders, and what sacrifices she does for both of you. If you do not know, all you need to do is ask her. She will appreciate your interest in her daily activities and tasks.
2. Offer help BEFORE she burns out
It is a bit too late to get involved in the obligations when she breaks down because you should not allow for her to get to that stage. The best time to help her out is NOW.
3. Participate in your marriage actively
Marriage means that it takes two for everything involved in it. Parenting, running the household, making the marriage work – you should be aware that your involvement in your family life is paramount. Work is only a part of all that, and it is not an excuse to get away from chores, disciplining your children, or planning special nights for the two of you.
4. Let her talk and listen all the way through
Women like to get all their thoughts out to reset. And indeed, for a mind which is so preoccupied, getting one’s thoughts out is the best way to settle it and calm it down. Listen to her carefully, let her speak her problems and express their feelings, show empathy, ask questions. Engage yourself fully in the conversation.
5. You do not have to fix her problems
If she is complaining about her problems, all you need to do is listen. If she wanted solutions, she would ask for it.
6. Hold her tight
Give your kids some kind of preoccupation and go to your wife. Hold her, tell her how much you love her, give her all the affection you are feeling toward her and let her feel your love. Be her shoulder to cry on and the only comfort she will need in life.
7. Be the partner you were meant to be
Marriage is the moment when two individual lives become one life of two individuals. It means sharing that life together and carrying one another’s burdens. It means the support of one another when things get tough; it means being one another’s friend, confidant, and lover.
You are not roommates, or two random people living together. You are a union of two people who love each other and would do anything to see each other happy.
8. Fill her with hope
Hope is the force that drives us to do the impossible and always strive for a better tomorrow. Be her encouragement and lift her up. Help her to recognize the good in every situation. Do not be negative or critical. And when she hits rock bottom, be the one who will pull her up.
9. Make yourself useful
Instead of waiting to be asked to do something, try and look around the house to spot the things that need to be done. Do the washing up if you spot dirty dishes in the sink, fix whatever is broken. Learn to look around and find things that need to be done.
10. Give her a day all to herself
If she has to do everything she does every day, she will never have some time for herself. Make sure you take over at least one day a week and let her spend that day doing things she would love to do for herself.
She will love going to the beauty salon, getting a haircut, a manicure, pedicure, massage, and perhaps even going shopping for some new clothes. Do not wake her up, fill up the bathtub and add some nice scents; give her some alone time. Make her feel special that day and let her know it is her day.
11. Ask what you can do
If you see her burning out and do not know what to do about it, ask her. She will appreciate it a lot because she knows how much you love her. She loves you as well, and she appreciates every little and big thing you do for her.