That day, the day when you met your partner will always be engraved in your heart. It was love at first sight, do you remember? An inexplicable moment of sharing tiny loving sparkles. Those were days filled with joy, happiness, love and mutual respect.
As time passes, this honeymoon phase slowly fades away. Like the magical dust is thrown in the air. Each partner’s true personality comes up on the surface. With all their flaws, weaknesses, in all their difference.
Here is where disagreements begin to invade your relationship. Moreover, they become a part of your everyday. This is where you start to feel isolated, fearful, sad, lonely, depressed.
Here are 8 red flags your relationship is making you depressed.
1.Your partner has the last word.
You say one thing, your partner-another. You have communication problems. Your partner doesn’t listen to you. They don’t care about what you think and feel. It seems like your opinion doesn’t matter to them anymore; they value highly only their point of view.
Moreover, your partner is the boss. They don’t accept your advice but everything they say must be accepted by your side. They dominate the relationship.
Because of this, you feel misunderstood, lonely, less powerful, weak, small.
2. You are afraid of them.
Maybe your partner is angry, and you have seen their negative side more than often? Maybe they have threatened you in some way? Or maybe you worry because you don’t know what they are capable of?
All this makes you watch out every word that comes out of your mouth and be careful of everything you do as everything might be misinterpreted.
This drains you physically and emotionally. You feel incapable to deal with this toxicity.
3. Your partner blames and criticizes you all the time.
If they have a bad day, they blame you. If they aren’t happy – it’s your fault. Your partner believes they are always right; they never admit their mistakes. That’s a problem which happens all the time.
What’s most irritating, your partner criticizes you, the way you think, the way you dress, your own life decisions.
You feel annoyed because you don’t want your partner to be another drop in the ocean full of critics.
4. Your partner controls you.
You are not able to make your own decisions. Your personal decisions are based on what your partner thinks. They manage with your time, they choose your friends, they tell you what to do… even how to feel.
Your partner’s control steals your individuality. They put chains on your freedom. Your freedom becomes their identity.
You feel your life slips through your fingers.
5. You aren’t comfortable being in your own skin.
Your partner is not willing to accept the real version of yourself. They don’t value your uniqueness. Moreover, they want to change you. This is not what a healthy relationship is supposed to be.
A person who respects and loves you will accept you with you all strengths and weaknesses, flaws and mistakes.
You feel uncomfortable being yourself.
6. You experience dramas and conflicts every day.
You start the day fighting. You go to sleep and you fight again. Your partner acts like a drama queen. It seems like they seek for a reason to involve you in a conflict every time they see you in front of their eyes.
Arguing is healthy…if you have mastered its art. Arguing followed with anger and dramas is toxic. It destroys your relationship. It drains both of you.
You feel exhausted of arguing that leads nowhere.
7. You live for the past days.
It seems that you are stuck in the past more than you live in the present moment. You get back to the time when your partner and you were enjoying love. You can’t understand where all the good days disappeared. You torture yourself with questions.
Moreover, your thoughts buy a ticket to future because you feel you don’t belong here anymore.
You feel isolated. You feel sad.
8. You don’t want to spend time with your partner anymore.
Nothing can get back that love spark from the time when you were in love. You feel you don’t know your partner anymore. You believe you share your life with a stranger. You can’t recognize your partner. You don’t even recognize yourself.
You feel depressed. You feel hopeless. And when hope is lost, things hardly get to follow the right path.
Nobody deserves to be in this kind of state.
If you have been experiencing all this, please do something about it. Communicate with your partner, try to solve the issues together, seek a professional help, walk away from the relationship if needed. Nothing is more important than your health.
Sandy White is a creative writer with a vivid imagination. The power of curiosity leads her to explore people’s inner world which is portrayed in her articles.