Home Psychology What It’s Really Like To Break Up With A “Narcissist”

What It’s Really Like To Break Up With A “Narcissist”

Narcissists like when they’re in the center of the attention. Everything must be about them in a relationship. Sometime this can be frustrating and difficult. That can’t last forever, and the day will come when you’ll decide to end it. But this means you will start your life all over again. You will feel the positive energy, and you will be able to spend some time for yourself. Way to go!

After the breakup you will need some period to adjust. No matter how hard and unpleasant your relationship has been, you need to get used to being alone. These times can seem very exciting but also very challenging for you. You will need to learn how to control your emotions with no one to rely on.

The breakup will be hard just like any breakup, maybe even harder. One day you might seem fine and happy about getting your life back and the next day you might feel depressed for losing the person you loved so much. It is this ups and downs that make this relationship breakup so hard.

It can be very helpful to analyze the things you are likely to encounter after this breakup:

1.Obsessing

Being in a relationship with a narcissist can be challenging. You will spend a lot of time trying to understand the behavior of your partner. This practice of analyzing your partner will stay with you long after you end the relationship. It’s up to you to force this habit out of your mind.

What can be helpful?

Whenever you find yourself thinking about the bad characteristics of your ex partner, just remind yourself that you are no longer together and he or she doesn’t impact your life anymore. Just try to force yourself to thinking of something else.

2. Rationalizing

In your ex relationship you have been used to find excuses about the behavior of your partner. That is normal, it’s what we do in order to stay with the person we love. We try to convince ourselves that nothing’s wrong. After the split, you will find yourself missing your partner no matter what happened between you two. It is quite common that you will start finding excuses and trying to find reasons for coming back together.

Just remember that it is normal to miss someone that you have spent so much time with. It is very important not to call or text your ex partner. You need to stay strong.

3. Feeling anxious

Anxiety is quite common in a relationship with a narcissist. They tend to put you on the edge and keep you there for the rest of the relationship.  After you split, you will probably feel additional stress from the breakup. This is quite normal. In order to get through this period faster you can try meditation, exercising or yoga.  

4. Feeling lost

Narcissist want to have the power when they are in relationship. They want total emotional control over their partner. No matter how hard you try you can never make things right. Normally, after you split, there is no one to do this to you. You have been so used to it that now you feel something is missing. You might even feel bored. Don’t worry, you will find plenty of exciting activities to do in your free time.

5. Shame

After you split up, it will become obvious to you how unhealthy your relationship was. That can make you feel embarrassed. You might think of yourself naïve and foolish for letting someone do this to you.  No need to do this to yourself. Just remember that narcissist are very good in manipulating people, it could happen to anyone no matter how smart you are.

6. Self-doubt

Narcissist are experts in bringing down your self-confidence. That makes you think less about yourself.

You might even have impaired judgment. Narcissists use this tactic to make their partner question their reality. Give yourself a break and don’t feel bad about who you are.

7. Sexual frustration

No matter how bad your relationship was, you will still miss your partner sexually. This is due to the ability of narcissists to make the person affectionate to them. They use this method to make you want them. This might continue long after the brake up. It’s up to you to stop it.

8. Jealousy

Manipulative people have the need to draw energy from someone. That is why they manipulate others. Therefore, your ex-partner will replace you with someone else soon after the breakup. They need that supply of energy. They see people like an opportunity, and they don’t have real emotions. Remember that next time you feel jealous of your ex. Just remember how bad and broken person they were.

9. Regret

Don’t feel regret for the lost time together with your ex. The important thing is that you managed to escape from that unhealthy relationship. Just look forward and never look back. You can’t change the past, but only you create your own future.

10. Grief

Reading this article might have helped you get rid of the bad feelings you have after ending a long term relationship. But still, some of them will stay. The best cure for this is time. Time heals all wounds. Just be grateful for ending that unhealthy relationship and look forward for meeting new people who deserve you.

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A professional writer with over a decade of incessant writing skills. Her topics of interest and expertise range from psychology, to all sorts of disciplines such as science and news.