Humans. Despite our differences, we all yearn for that unconditional understanding and compassion from another person. It is simply in our nature to crave a real connection. Our whole life gravitates around finding someone who would love us just the way we are.
But, unfortunately, life doesn’t always follow our paths. Most of the times it runs its own pace and leaves us utterly disappointed.
We hope, we build our expectations, we convince ourselves that miracles happen, and then when we least expect it, life strikes us with the unpredictable.
Eventually, these disappointments make us feel like we’re not good enough. Those kinds of thoughts usually lead us to even more terrifying conclusions.
“What if something is wrong with me?”; “What if I never find love?” ; “I’m such a loser.”
But, even though these signs of insecurities are considered a normal reaction to life, it is important to understand that choosing to go down that road will never help us.
Love might not come right away, but that is fine. There’s no reason why we should suffer in the meantime. Loneliness and sadness are still feelings. They might not be the most desirable ones, but they are still a part of us.
So, the most important thing you can do in this situation is to accept those painful feelings and give yourself the love you need. Be aware of whatever thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing and give yourself the break you need!
Here are 7 self-healing techniques that will help you cope with time alone:
1. KEEP IN TOUCH WITH YOURSELF
Do you feel like you’re in a constant hurry? If the answer is yes, then please steady yourself. Find time to be alone and reflect on yourself. Listen to your thoughts, no matter how disturbing they sound. Let your emotions flow and allow yourself to experiment with your creativity.
Open a diary and each day, challenge yourself to write everything that goes on inside of you. Be it your fears, a short story or your to-do list for the week.
The whole point is to spend more time with yourself.
2. JUST BREATHE
Put on your favorite music, set the mood in your room and just breathe. Focus on the sensation of your breath and feel how your body is moving to the rhythm of the air going in and going out. Become aware of this natural process.
Notice how the air slowly touches your nose, flows through your throat and goes directly into your lings. Let your thoughts drift away and focus both your body and your mind on these sensations.
3. CREATE AN INNER COMFORTER
You know that voice in our head that constantly tells you how wrong you are? Well, get rid of it. Our conscience is our greatest guidance in life, but once this little fella turns into a devil who likes to criticize everything we do, feel, or think, it is time for a change.
Create an inner comforter. A voice that doesn’t blame you, but encourages you. A conscience that accepts you just the way you are. Learn to cultivate a more compassionate self.
4. LET YOURSELF FEEL
Sit and try to relax. Use your learned mindful breathing to center yourself. And, soften. Try to picture the emotion you’re experiencing. Is it painful? Don’t run away from it.
Accept that feeling and let it flow through you. You did it. Give yourself a physical compassion and a mental hug. Empathize with your pain. Treat yourself as you would treat a friend in need.
5. LOVE YOURSELF EXACTLY THE WAY YOU ARE
Stand before a mirror and look at yourself. Look at all of your flaws, pimples, acne, imperfections, wrinkles and learn to love yourself exactly the way you are. You are incredible. You are an amazing human being.
Now, using your own name, challenge yourself to say this out loud every day. It might make you feel weird at first, but I promise, you’ll be surprised by the effect it will have on you in the long run.
6. START MEDITATING
If you are having trouble shutting off the irritating background noise, start meditating. Find a comfortable position, close your eyes and focus on your breathing.
Try to relax and think of a happy, warm and a loving memory. Direct your feelings toward it. Now think of someone you neither like nor dislike. Try to feel the same thing toward them. Fill yourself with positive emotions. Radiate love.
7. LAUGH UNTIL YOUR CHEEKS HURT
Last, but never least, laugh. Laugh as loud as you can. Laugh until you cry. Laugh until your stomach and your cheeks hurt. Don’t let life bring you down. Don’t let your feelings of sadness determine your path in life. Embrace them as a part of you and learn to cope with every emotion you experience.
It’s time to give yourself a break.
A professional writer with many years of experience in the fields of psychology, human relationships, science, and spirituality.