Photo by Tal Heres
What is loneliness? Its grasp can take up so much energy of your being that many cannot stand it. But what we define as loneliness is, in fact, a time of our lives where we are most able to connect with the most important person in our lives – ourselves.
We have always been taught that we are incomplete alone; that there should always be someone around us to fill up the void of our being. It is true that we are first and foremost social animals and we need bonding with other people.
But in order to be able to truly bond with people, on an unconditional basis, we need to know how to bond with ourselves. In times of loneliness, we are in fact left with ourselves. This is the time you can truly find your true self and embrace it. You shouldn’t be afraid of being lonely, as it means you are with you – in other words, you are never lonely.
We often try to use other people as a way to get away from ourselves. But running away from oneself means poisoning yourself with the things you bury deep down inside. The truth is that if you don’t embrace yourself first, you will always feel lonely, despite all the people you are trying to surround yourself with.
In those special times when you are with yourself, try to stop and listen to what your silence has to say to you. Learn to acknowledge your emotions and thoughts, embrace your flaws and fears, accept your whole being.
The truth is, you are never alone – you have yourself. And this is a treasure we all come with, a treasure we don’t think twice before sharing it with others and a treasure we are afraid to bask in.
Understanding that there isn’t such thing as loneliness will bring you closer to yourself and to the treasure you shine with. You will never know your true worth until you are ready to look at it.
Oftentimes, by avoiding looking inside ourselves in times of loneliness, we forget just how much we are worth. Because of our loneliness we so desperately try to avoid, we often start underestimating ourselves and we stop being ourselves.
Once you understand that you are never lonely, you will understand that you don’t ‘need’ people. There is a difference between ‘needing’ someone and enjoying being around someone because you ‘want’ to be with them.
True freedom comes when we learn our true value by looking inside and learning to love ourselves. And you will only learn this by embracing yourself in times of loneliness.
I choose to experience times of solitude throughout the day to be able to self-reflect, to revisit myself and see how things are going inside. It’s because if I don’t ask myself how I am, I will always think that somebody else should.
People don’t owe you anything, and you shouldn’t create expectations about things you are most responsible for. Being in touch with yourself is something nobody can grant you – you and only you can do that.
Copyright © Curious Mind Magazine
Inspired by Ariella Kellett – Thought Catalog