A few days ago, I overheard a conversation of two colleagues of mine. They were talking about love, the meaning of that word, the purpose that we humans have on earth and the fact that the word love is easily tossed around like it’s nothing.
But what piqued my interest was their talk about the most common types of love. One of them said that there’s a huge difference between being in love and loving someone. And that was the moment when I had to interfere to ask them for an explanation.
At first, I laughed at them and said, “I’m sorry, but I don’t quite agree with you. It is the same thing. The person you love is the person you are in love with, right?”
“Well in a way, yes,” said one of my colleagues. And then she started explaining her theory to me.
Suddenly, in that exact moment, everything came back to me.
It was like I had a déjà vu.
I smiled because I remembered.
I remembered how gently those big, green eyes of yours caressed my face when we first met.
I remembered the smell of your skin combined with the scent of your cologne when hugged.
I remembered your palm softly touching mine as you said, “Nice to meet you”.
I remembered what it felt like to have those crazy butterflies in your tummy.
I remembered our first official date and how passionate our kiss was.
I remembered that it was exactly those moments that made me fall in love with you. Those midnight calls, those sweet kisses, the suspenseful wait until our next date, your arms wrapped around my body, your skin against my body, the idea of us, the endless meaningful conversations…everything.
But, then… the closer we got and the more we fell in love with each other…
I saw how fragile your heart is. I learned how much you’ve been hurt in the past, so I wanted to be the one person who would take your emotional baggage and carry it until you feel better. Your personal guardian.
When you told me that you love me, but you are scared of getting hurt, I felt the need to show you just how much I love you. I felt the need to comfort you by letting you know that I am here to stay forever.
And when your whole life, everything that you’ve built, collapsed in front of you, I wanted to be the shelter that you so desperately needed. I just wanted to hold you in my arms and let you know that no matter what happens, you are always safe with me.
That was the moment when I realized that I genuinely love you.
I stopped falling for you because finally, I was sure that I already love you.
So, eventually, I understood what my colleague was saying.
Falling in love with someone and loving them are two completely different things. They may sound like it is the same feeling, but it is the intensity and the depth of those emotions that make them so distinctive.
The temporary effect that those tingly, colorful butterflies in your stomach give you is inevitable. It is a sign that we truly like the person standing next to us. It marks the moment of falling head over heels in love with another person. It is the initial attraction.
But, loving another person is making a decision that you are going to devote both your heart and soul to them. It is holding their hand and standing next to them in the pouring rain. It is sticking with them through thick and thin. It is fighting together against every obstacle that is trying to pull you apart. It is sacrificing.
That is why I am done falling for you. I just love you.
A professional writer with many years of experience in the fields of psychology, human relationships, science, and spirituality.