Self-development is the one sustained goal in every self-aware person seeking to understand his or her potential and the extent to which it can be pushed. Any hindrances towards one achieving the best possible outcomes from their lives are something that should be eliminated effectively such that the path towards self-development is a unidirectional upward process.
Why Is Self-development Difficult And What Are The 8 Most Common Self-Improvement Problems?
According to psychologists, there are a few factors that make the self – improvement difficult for you:
1. You make too many changes at once
You may own a character that wants to change everything at the same time and overnight. That is a wrong attitude, so you should tackle one change at a time, and when you realize you are making some progress, you can start with another one. Set a big and audacious goal and make it realistic. When you set big and realistic goals, it is the beginning of improving yourself.
2. You have the wrong motivation
Positive emotions always lead to long-lasting results and success, so if you are led by negative emotions such as anxiety, guilt, or fear, it can be impossible to change yourself.
Sometimes, people fear success itself. They can give up just before they succeed in doing something. some studies have shown that fear of achieving something may be associated with a person’s behavior and their maintaining and starting behavior. (1)
3. You probably give up on your first failure
Sometimes failure should be considered a success, and you can see it as a lesson and learn from the mistakes made. So before starting changes in your life, plan in advance to recover yourself after the first failure and try again. You should remind yourself that these feelings are temporary and try to contemplate the big picture and try to think clearly, not make any harsh decisions about giving up, and stay focused on goals.
4. You focus just on the end result
Self–improvement is not usually just accomplishing a goal. The real change happens during the journey, and if you focus just on the end result, you won’t realize how important each step is and how you make changes and improvements every day during the process.
5. You are under the influence of a cognitive bias
Cognitive biases usually distort meanings, influence your beliefs, change your decisions, and usually happen when you think that you think logically or rationally. Sometimes they can be very subtle, and we do not even notice them, but they act as mental shortcuts that help us to make judgments but lead us to bias.
There are different types of biases, and they tend to simplify your processing of the information that comes from the outer world and you make decisions more easily and with relative speed, but in fact, they are judgmental and lead us to poor judgments and decisions
There are some signs that you can notice if you are under the influence of cognitive bias:
- You think that everyone shares your opinion
- When you have some problems, you usually blame other people or factors
- You usually pay attention to events and stories that share your own beliefs
- You learn something little about a certain topic, but you think you know too much
- You help others to achieve their goals but lack the motivation to take personal credit for your own accomplishments (2)
6. You do not commit enough
Even though you want to change, sometimes, you do not commit enough, and in that case, you need some commitment tools to help you achieve your goal more easily and in less time, like:
- Get a physical reminder of the thing you are resolved to do it
- Improve your time management and make a self–growth plan and stick to it
- Reduce the chances of being distracted and focus on your task, and if possible, concentrate on one task at a time
- Educate yourself, especially on the steps you need to take to achieve the change you want for yourself, what self–improvement is, and make a self–improvement plan
- Make a strong decision that you want to commit yourself to the set goal, but still, make sure the goals you set are realistic and achievable
- Do some experiments and what does it work and what doesn’t. You can see the reasons why are you so successful in some things while not successful in others and make some small changes if needed
7. You work too much and focus only on the profit
If you focus just on making money, you cannot feel happy and fulfilled. You will always find pleasure, and you will commit more if you are passionate about something, so do something with passion and the money will come easily, and as a plus, you will finish your goal and improve yourself with a relative speed.
But, remind yourself that life is not just about work, and do not forget to have some fun in between; it will be a great reward for your creativity.
8. You get sucked by your mobile phone and other technology
Most people today spend too much time on their phones and other technological devices, so they do not have time to grow, build new skills, and stay focused.
If you spend some time on your smartphone, do it smartly and outsmart it, learn some new things, and develop yourself in every way possible.
What Are The 3 Personal Development Barriers?
May you have heard the phrase that the biggest success in life is the development of self. Yes, that is true because the key to your personal happiness is in a constant improvement of the quality of your life.
In some way, all the actions you take during the day are aimed toward your “self-development,” and it is important to do it with positive intent. Life is a dynamic process, and we need to get moving. And like everything in nature, everything that doesn’t grow will eventually die.
Still, many people do not take action to contribute to their personal growth goals, and there are some personal development barriers that are actually interrelated behaviors. Due to the following 3 development barriers, we are stuck and cannot take any actions and usually end up in failure and without making any progress in life.
Procrastination is a fierce enemy and if you are able to overcome it, you can be very successful in accomplishing many things in life and doing something meaningful. When we procrastinate things in life, life is sleeping away, and we are wasting time and end up regretting things we haven’t done.
One of the main reasons why we procrastinate is our willpower, poor time management, lack of self–discipline, and difficulty in prioritizing and seeing what is essential in life.
In our modern societies, we are free to choose and make our own decisions, but sometimes this leads to confusion and demotivation because we do not know what is right or wrong and what is a priority.
There are some studies that show that procrastination causes a problem for people that are part of the long-life learning, and it is especially important for the academic long-life learning, education, and personal growth and development. (3)
That is why you should keep in mind that when you procrastinate, you are stuck and you do not move from the place you are, and you do not have any benefits from everything life has to offer.
When people are indecisive and this usually comes from the fear of failure, they do not realize that being indecisive means that they have already failed. It is very simple, if you do not make any decisions in your life, you do not move forward, and you remain immobilized.
When you hesitate, it looks like a disease that kills your life step by step. It usually comes as a result of anxiety and making a decision that you can’t imagine failing. So, do not fear that something bad will happen and you are going to fail, instead, be brave and take action and make decisions as much as you can.
3. The Comfort Zone
In your comfort zone, you feel secure and you know everything, you are at ease with everything, and you feel a big challenge to step outside and involves a great risk.
Leaving your comfort zone comes hand in hand with developing a strong mindset and expanding possibilities. It is one of the biggest inspirations when it comes to taking risks and learning new things in life, which leads to self–improvement and continual personal growth.
Leaving your comfort zone is the phase in your life when you try and make mistakes, but when you reach a certain level, success is inevitable. Still, be sure that this doesn’t happen overnight.
When you leave your comfort zone, you can try the following tips:
- Take one step at a time and monitor your progress. Be self–aware and see where your boundaries are to make the whole process smoother
- Reframe the stress and look at it with different eyes, like a stimulus that can sometimes be exciting and take you out of your comfort zone
- Start doing things differently in your life, and break the old routines
- Identify the comfort zones in your life that do more harm than good
- Expand your professional skill set and build your self–confidence
What Are The Five Things You Can Do For Self-Development And Self-Improvement?
To facilitate this and ensure that all that is holding you back is dealt with- here are a few pointers to overcome problems in self-development.
1. Trust Yourself
Believe in your abilities to make the right decision at the right time and in your goodness. Trust yourself to have the abilities and the amount of self-identification you possess that you need to work towards your goals in life. In the moments of self-doubt and worry know that you are always going to be there for yourself when no one else is- be your own ultimate support and most trusted confidant.
When multiple options are presented to you and all of them seem tempting take some time to ask yourself what you really want and go for it- don’t abide by whatever others say even if they mean the best for you because of this way you are becoming more responsible for yourself and your decisions.
2. Don’t run from confrontation
No achievements have been ever truly difficult or truly easy- a substantial amount of careful hard work balanced with originality and determination together blend to produce the best results in any situation. In life, there are going to be many situations that require you to stand up and speak for yourself. Courage, determination, perseverance, and being true to yourself; true enough to face any situations and oppositions that may arise and question your motives and abilities are the key face most problems and confronting them with ease and self-confidence. This starts by confronting your problems within yourself- build a framework for your conscience based on moral conduct and practical solutions- and then abide by this. As long as you are confident that what you are doing is right for you, you should be able to face anybody and any situation that is determined to prove you wrong.
3. Don’t be overconfident
It is a well-known saying that states that pride comes before a fall. The truth behind the statement lies in the fact that when one is overly confident about their skills, they are simply not willing to change anything about themselves even if it means their betterment. Overconfidence is a sure hindrance to those seeking self-development as it sets a sure block to further progress and makes a person close-minded and not open to constructive criticism while leading to a significant lack of humility. Humility is a virtue that is seen unanimously among all those who have achieved great successes in life. Because these are the people who have truly realized the value of being open to seeking knowledge at all times because there is no better way for developing oneself. Accept that nobody is perfect however good you might be-this does not mean that others are better, it just means that you can be so much better than what you are currently at all times. So by being willing to accept criticism in the right way you are paving yourself a path of infinite possibilities. Don’t let negative criticism get you down but also know that when criticism comes from loved ones and those who wish to see you at your best, there must be some amount of experience and wisdom speaking-therefore sincerely consider it and at least give it a try. (4)
4. Be your own inspiration
This is the truth that many fail to realize. One can aspire as much as they want to be exactly like someone else who has inspired them- probably in more than one way; a major lifestyle change or by accumulating and saving great wealth or just by achieving great popularity and fame. However, being lost in life goals set by someone else prevent you from realizing what exactly it is that you want from life. This does not mean that you must rebel against all norms of society. What it means this instead of taking inspiration from others and pursuing similar goals, write down exactly what it is that you want and work towards being the best at all of these. Stop comparing your successes with others on the basis of the duration of achievement, quality of the achievement and other factors. Take your own time and be the best version of yourself that you can; you are the only one you have something to actually prove something to, as you are the only one who is going to stick with yourself till the end. (5)
5. Set Yourself Goals And Surround Yourself With Positive People
You can see how people that surround you make an impact on your life. If that affects you negatively, try to make changes and surround yourself with people with positive energy. In addition, make a list of achievable goals and stick to them; you can learn a new activity, for example, and eliminate the old habits that weren’t working in your life.
A professional writer with over a decade of incessant writing skills. Her topics of interest and expertise range from health, nutrition and psychology.