Life is a challenge. Sometimes life goes good, sometimes life goes bad. Every day we are experiencing different trials and tribulations. Then still, some days will be better than others. Most of us have forgotten the real purpose of living, and thus we conceal it under our complex jobs, chores and responsibilities that capture us more and more day by day.
We are all trying to get ourselves a better life; therefore we are galloping through the time, tracking the end of the day until we find ourselves not contented and troubled by countless problems.
We begin to perceive that every passing day our life is becoming tougher and more entangled and we start complaining about how difficult life has become. What we are not aware of is that we sometimes are solely responsible for burdening ourselves with inessential pressure and that we are the only creators of the complexity in our lives. Nonetheless, we can just as easily create a simpler life as we can do a more complex one.
Life wasn’t this hard when we were younger, right? At least, it feels that way. But the only reality is that life is still easy and it will always be. The only difference being is our age. We got older, and the older we get, the harder we make things for ourselves. When we were young we used to see the world with pure, sanguine eyes.
We all knew what we wanted and we had no prejudice or secret agendas. We adored people who smiled and we ran away from people who frown. As we grew older, we became discouraged by the negative influences. The perspectives altered, demands got bigger and that’s how we begin to acquire the habitual skepticism.
Eventually, we have made our lives harder and we have lost touch with who we really are, what we really want and what we really need, without even being aware of it.
Here are ten of the things that are making our lives harder, than it really has to be. Hopefully, when realizing all these things one can finally have some contentment.
- You assign negative intent to people’s actions.
You always take everything as a personal insult. Your colleague didn’t offer you to get coffee together. Another chauffeur cut you off in traffic. Your friend never called you back. Everyone can see a cause to be offended on a daily basis. So what induced you to be offended? Don’t take things personally. People have their own lives to care about, too. Stop doing this to yourself. Stop attributing negative intent to the unintended actions of the people you know. Make your happy days by finding something good in everyone you meet. If you keep looking closely into everything people around you do and you always assign ulterior motives to their unintentional shortcomings, you can never be happy.
- You’re your own movie star.
You are one of those people who think that everything comes around you. And you always get to be the very center of every experience you have ever had. Regrettably, you have forgotten to include other characters in your script. As a result, people are so unaware of the main role that you anticipate to have. Therefore, others may ruin your script by not giving you a promotion or not falling in love with you. So, you better let other people star once in a while. Life would get more interesting even for you. One cannot always be the center of attention; everyone gets to enjoy it occasionally.
- You always think about worst-case scenarios.
You often think that something innocuous will become an impending catastrophe in your mind. For instance, a blemish on your face becomes a cancerous tumor. A flight to another state turns into plane crashing. Your child not attending a specific school turns into him never getting a good job.
What’s the point of you spending your precious time and energy on anxiety and stress about your negative future? Negativity only breeds extra negativity. You are simply depleting yourself of what you are trying to accomplish today.
It’s your choice to make; either you are seeing the world through a lens of hesitation and discouragement or hope and exhilaration? Will you be one of those people with a smile or a frown on their faces?
- You are victim of your high expectations.
You have set high standards to your happiness, anticipating people would go miles for you as you ascribe them unrealistic expectations. Your boyfriend forgot your favorite song, your mom didn’t notice your new nails done, and your friend didn’t wish you luck before your final exam.
You keep your expectations so high and that’s why you get so disappointed at the end. Higher expectations lead to higher disappointments. Instead, as long as you keep you assumptions down you will have a greater chance of getting pleasantly surprised by people’s actions.
- You are a sign-waiting person
You cannot make any decision without receiving a sign. I have only one question referring this point. How would you know which is the right sign and if the sign is positive or negative?
You would be much happier if you make a rather rational decision. It’s not that the fate or other power plays role in our lives. But it would be better to shape fate than be governed by it.
- You never risk.
You always play on the safe side and never take risks. You are researching every detail to ensure that you are making the best choice. You are afraid to do something impulsive or to take chances.
But, life in reality isn’t so predictable or safe as if taken for granted. In order to move forward sometimes you have to take a risk. And who knows, maybe one day you will be glad you did.
- You compare yourself to other people
Don’t compare your life to others. Not only will this stop you from improving your own life but it will most probably make you feel resentful and envious. Different people choose different paths to walk through life and none of those are identical.
Therefore, no one should ever have as identical life as someone else. It doesn’t necessarily means that your life is miserable since is not as someone else’s. Instead, that’s why you should only compare yourself to the person you were yesterday and try to become better.
8. You allow other people to steal from you.
Instead of worrying whether people steal from you and checking your valuable possessions if they are on their right place, people are stealing your most precious thing- your time. And you are not taking the same precautions to protect it. On the contrary, pessimistic people, egocentric people, selfish people succeed to take your time away. You should guard your time closely like Fort Know and only give it to people who are worth of and appreciate it.
- You won’t move on
You are full of bitter memories and loss? Are there people who need your forgiveness?
In order to be happy, you need to let go of things that are weighing you down, work your way through and try to become happier, make changes and do your best until you succeed. Loss of a loved one, you can’t get over him/her. Make peace with it! Letting go is always hard, but it’s always worth it.
- You never give back
You are used to only taking and not giving back. Then you have never enjoyed the incomparable satisfaction that comes from the giving and sharing. Change your life, get among people, spread positivity, become a volunteer. Try just with giving someone a compliment, saying encouraging words, smiling to someone, you will not only make their day better, but you would make your day brighter. Remember, giving and receiving go hand in hand!
“Life is as simple as these three questions:
What do I want? Why do I want it? And, how will I achieve it?” ― Shannon L. Alder