It is a well-known truth that there are plenty of toxic people out there. And, it is not that the people are toxic per se, but their behavior. However, this doesn’t make them bad people, it just means that they have certain behaviors that are damaging and have a negative impact on our well-being.
How Can You Tell If A Person Is Toxic?
Toxic people are everywhere around you and you may find them in your family members. They are usually unpleasant, draining, and difficult and do not positively impact your life and career.
You will meet these people at least once during your life, and you probably have a toxic colleague who plays political games at work, a family friend who always drains you out after the conversation you had, or you have dealt with hard-to-please customers.
They are sometimes hard to spot, but they are the dark personality types such as narcissists, emotional manipulators, sociopaths, and psychopaths.
Some of them have toxic traits and do not realize they hurt people around them.
Most toxic people are emotional vampires and will try to drain all the positivity and joy you have in yourself, which may lead to anxiety and depression.
They can also urge you to make poor choices in life, accommodating to their needs, and this means diminished self–esteem and confidence.
Below are 25 traits that show a person can be toxic to you.
1. They Are Always The Victim
In their head, no matter what the situation is – they are always right. Any problem that may occur is always because of someone else’s actions. Even when it is their fault, they will never admit it.
When they are late for work, it is the traffic. When they break up, it is because of their partner’s jealousy and evil nature. You get the point. If you have someone in your life that always plays the victim card on you – lose him for good.
2. They Are Constantly Interrupting
These people are so focused on themselves and their ego is so high that they are forgetting their manners (if they have manners) when it comes to holding a proper conversation.
They constantly interrupt others when they are talking – which is really annoying. A normal person would apologize when they interrupt someone, but a toxic one never does. They are rude and clueless.
3. They Can’t Admit When They Are Wrong
A toxic person has to always be right. In their mind, there is nothing wrong with them and they never make mistakes. No matter how much evidence you have to the contrary – they will always find you guilty and they will never admit to their wrongdoings.
They can even become loud and aggressive to win the argument. This is an irritating and undesirable characteristic of a person.
4. They Are Bad Listeners
Even though it is normal to think about what are you going to say while the other one is talking, this is not an effective technique. However, this behavior doesn’t make a person a bad listener.
What makes them bad listeners is plain disinterest and a lack of response and acknowledgment in the conversation. More specifically in what the other person has to say and just continuing to talk about themselves.
5. They Boost Their Own Ego
Let’s clear something up – an exceptional person doesn’t have to tell the world they are exceptional because their actions speak louder than words. A toxic person, however, is not modest when it comes to naming their qualities.
So, when you hear someone talking about how amazing they are without being asked in the first place, know that you are dealing with someone who may not be that great.
6. They Are Attention Seekers
This one doesn’t require further explanation. These people need to be always the center of attention. They are always interrupting others because they want to dominate the conversation.
They are only happy when they talk about themselves. You can spot them easily because they are always the loudest ones in the group of people.
7. They Are Always Judging Others
You have probably heard someone making a rude comment about a person that they have never even met before on the basis that they can sense when something is wrong with a person. This is a red flag that says a lot about someone’s character.
People who are rude to someone they don’t even know, or worse, start making negative comments on their physical appearance – are toxic people that you don’t need in your life.
8. They Are Still Cliquish
It is not hard to spot people who act like they are still in high school. They tend to look down on others and judge them only by their appearance. They see themselves as the best – others are poorly dressed, dirty, and unworthy if they didn’t have the latest fashion clothes or drive the newest car.
Toxic people consider themselves to be higher in class than everyone and that others should admire them.
9. They Are Disrespectful Of Everyone
Toxic people have no manners. They still cut people off in traffic, litter, don’t say ‘I am sorry’ or ‘thank you’, and so on. They have such disturbing social behavior that you can’t help but ask yourself how can anyone not be ashamed of themselves and what kind of parents raised these people.
10. They Are Physically Or Emotionally Abusive
This one is self-explaining. Any person who is abusive towards others can’t be a good person. Full stop. And, if we find ourselves being abused be it physically or emotionally, or if we discover that another person or animal is being abused – we should immediately report the case to authorities.
11. They Don’t Take Any Responsibility For Their Actions
This behavior goes hand in hand with #3, but it is much worse. These people cannot take responsibility for their actions because they don’t see a fault in them. They can often be found arguing with an authority figure and aggressively stating their illogical explanations.
12. They Have No Compassion
The most humane trait that a person possesses is their ability to feel empathy and compassion for others. However, these traits are missing from a toxic person. A toxic person is unable to empathize with others nor be compassionate towards someone.
If they show some compassion, it is usually fake and done in order to get something out of you.
13. They Can’t Let Go Of The Past
They will hold a grudge against you for a long time if you have done something in the past to hurt their feelings. If you try to draw their attention and tell them their behavior is unacceptable and not right, they will bring up everything you have done wrong for them in the past to get revenged.
Even though you will say sorry and apologize for all things you have done wrong, toxic people will continue to hold a grudge against you and use the wrong things you have done as a weapon against you.
14. They Lie To Your Face
Toxic people can make up unreliable stories and insist that they are true. The made-up story is usually twisted. They will retell it very convincingly because they usually believe their own nonsense and can easily make you believe it as well.
If you caught them lying, they would tell you that you are a bad friend and you will feel like it is your fault that you caught them lying.
What is more, they never apologize for their lies, and if you argue with them, you will see that there is no point in arguing, so all you need to do is move forward and realize that for them being happy is more important than being right.
15. They Can Hurt Your Self-esteem
Toxic people always leave us feeling worse than we were before. They constantly create negativity, and you can immediately define them as toxic. However, for some people, it takes years to recognize them as toxic.
When they see that you feel beautiful and confident, they will think that they can’t control you and will constantly point out your flaws and criticize almost everything about you, starting from your appearance to your thoughts and beliefs. This can prevent your spiritual growth and lower your self–esteem, and confidence in time.
16. They Expect That You Focus Only On Them
Toxic people will try to distance you from other people and like friends and family, so after some period, you will end up being alone…with just…them. That is because they need all of your attention and want to protect you from others who want to warn you that they manipulate and control your life, so they will try as much as they can to push people out of your life.
17. They Are Hypocrites
Toxic people always make scenes and usually say one thing while doing something opposite. Hypocrisy is just another word for injustice, so toxic people make scenes when you do something that they don’t approve of and accuse you of not being a good friend, but if they do something you do not approve of, but would say that you are oversensitive and you get upset easily. For example, if they are 20 minutes late and you start complaining, they say you get upset so easily, but if you are 2 minutes late, they make huge scenes and say you do not respect them.
18. They Put You On Test
When toxic people put you on a test, it means that they want to control you. They are very suspicious about everything.
They know that they have bad feelings and want to project them to people around them, so it is very likely that they will put you on some sort of test to check your loyalty. If you pass this test, they will try to praise you, but if you fail, you will feel bad and you will need to prove better next time you are on the test.
This way, they know that they have power over you.
19. They Think That Everyone Else In Their Life Is Problematic
Toxic people usually always turn their stories quickly to other ways and always blame others for their life and problems. They always tell different stories about crazy ex-girlfriends, boyfriends, or friends. When you see that the number of their crazy and weird friends and negative relationships is going higher and higher, it means that something is wrong and the red flag should start to show up. This means that they are probably problematic, not the friends and friendships they had.
20. They Gaslight You
Toxic people are usually manipulative and make you feel doubt about your own thoughts and actions. This can lead to doubting even your beliefs, perceptions, and judgments about things you have made and you have in your own life.
This is just another example of psychological abuse and they just want to confuse and disorient you so they can easily gain control over you and dictate your liking.
This can easily degrade your personality and your ability to challenge and confront your abuser. When you confront them, they would usually say that you imagine things and that you are too sensitive.
21. They Invade Your Personal Space And Ignore Your Set Boundaries
If you have set boundaries, toxic people won’t respect them, and they might show up at your home although you didn’t invite them, make some decisions without your consent, take some personal things without asking, and can even try to control your time and people you spend your free time with.
They might touch you without asking permission, may physically block you when you want to leave, and sometimes get angry if you try to react.
22. They Do Not Respect Your Time
This is another way toxic people can show that they do not respect you. They never show up on time, you always wait for them in the shopping mall, and you call them they are unreachable, they are always late when going to pick them up for a date, and they say they need five minutes to prepare themselves, and you wait for them for an hour.
23. They May Shift Personalities
They may act as a chameleon and change their personality depending on the people they are surrounded with. They can suddenly change their thoughts, beliefs, and values, depending on the company. For example, they do not eat meat, but suddenly in someone else’s company, they love to eat barbeque.
They probably want to please other people, but you can easily notice that they are not honest and play games.
24. They Abuse Substances
Toxic people usually have toxic and negative personalities and feelings, so they might try to cope with this by abusing substances and having bad habits such as gambling or gossiping, eating or drinking too much, and they want you to involve others in their habits and bring them down.
25. They Bring You Down When You Are Happy
When they see that you are happy, they will try to make you feel unhappy. They can easily make you feel unhappy by giving negative compliments, belittling your successes, and concentrating and speaking only about their own. They are emotional vampires who want to criticize you constantly, so stay away from people who can’t rejoice in your accomplishment and are envious of your success.
7 Signs Of A Toxic Woman
You may feel stuck in your relationship, and it feels like a one-way street and a draining experience. In some cases, the fault may be in your partner, and you should look for some signs and anomalies that may seem to be harmless but can indicate that you are dealing with a toxic girlfriend.
So, the first step is identifying these signs of toxic people, and you can keep an eye on the following ones in case you feel that you are feeling with a toxic person:
1. She Drains You Out
If you feel like you constantly give and she constantly takes, you can ask yourself does my girlfriend or wife reciprocate your efforts. This is one of the first signs your relationship goes in the wrong direction and signs that someone is toxic.
She obviously has some high expectations from you, but she doesn’t meet the standards she has set for you. This can make you feel unpleasant and your relationship unstable.
2. She Never Admits Her Mistakes
She always finds a way to justify her actions and never says “I am sorry “for her wrong actions.
You can simply not make her apologize for the mistakes made. This is the real sign of a toxic relationship. Anyway, you shouldn’t give up, and if you think that you are right, you should stand your ground and try one another exhaustive fight to give another chance to your relationship and keep it alive.
3. She Controls Every Aspect Of Your Life
You are constantly controlled by your girlfriend or partner about the clothes you wear, the people you are friends with, and sometimes even the career you pursue in your life. Everything must be approved by her. So, if you are in a situation where you must always get approval from your girlfriend for the actions you take, you are undoubtedly in a toxic relationship.
4. She Is Not Completely Transparent
Being honest is one of the most important aspects of a healthy relationship. But your toxic girlfriend will use these toxic lies that will soon erase your confidence. Sometimes you can not fix something that is so much broken, although she finds excuses and says that she lied because she did not want to fight. You should always know when something is enough and not let yourself be hurt in the future. Maybe the worst lie is cheating, and this is one of the best signs you are in a toxic relationship.
5. She Is Constantly Criticizing You
Constructive criticism is regarded as healthy, but if you have a constant fault, sometimes found with no grounds, it is probably designed to turn you down and make you feel bad about yourself.
You should always notice what your girlfriend thinks about the negative sides of your personality. If you see that she is persistent in criticizing your weaknesses and all this is spiced with bitterness and scorn, there is no mistake that you are dealing with a toxic person.
6. Your Life Is Just About Your Relationship
Toxic girlfriends can be really clingy and demand the constant attention of their partners. So, your toxic girlfriend will act manipulatively. She will blackmail you and use all kinds of coaxing and fights to stop you from doing things you like and be at every step you take. If you want to go out with friends, she will sulk endlessly. If you spend time with family, prepare for endless tears and emotional blackmail.
Toxic women will do everything to control your life, so you should start noticing how much autonomy and space you have in your relationship.
7. She Doesn’t Appreciate You
A healthy relationship involves two partners who constantly cherish and appreciate each other, are comfortable with each other, and take little everyday things for granted. But, if your girlfriend feels very special and whatever you make is never pleased and not convinced that you offer her the treatment she needs.
One research has found that one of the leading causes of divorce is the unappreciation of unmet emotional needs. (1)
If you feel that your girlfriend doesn’t appreciate you, you will start to feel aversion and resentment toward her.
Mary Wright is a professional writer with more than 10 years of incessant practice. Her topics of interest gravitate around the fields of the human mind and the interpersonal relationships of people.If you have a general question or comment please fill out the form and we will get back to you as soon as possible https://curiousmindmagazine.com/contact-us/ .