If you’ve been married for 10, 15, or 25-plus years, it’s normal to hit a lull in your relationship where you no longer feel the same spark that you did in the early days. But that’s all it is – a temporary blip on the road to somewhere greater.
Now it’s time to refresh your marriage and rekindle the flame. Here are some ideas:
- Try “Day Dates”
For the most part, couples go on dates at night. It usually looks like drinks and dinner or maybe dinner and a movie. And while there’s nothing wrong with this, it’s easy to get into a predictable routine. You can switch things up by having “day dates.”
A day date is exactly what it sounds like. You go on dates during the day, when it’s possible to be more active and enjoy more experiences together. Examples include hiking, playing tennis, taking a pottery class, or simply grabbing lunch and shopping.
- Give Random Gifts
Random gifts are another way to keep your marriage fresh. If you’re at work and you’re thinking about your wife at home, send her same-day delivery flowers from a local florist. Call ahead to include her favorite flowers and colors. You can even include a note to let your wife know that you’re thinking about her. Small things like this go a long way.
- Spice Things Up in the Bedroom
The longer you’re together, the easier it is to get into a sexual rut. And even if you’re having plenty of sex, the quality can deteriorate as things become predictable. It can start to feel like you’re just going through the motions. But if you make a commitment to spicing things up, you’ll find that your sex life can actually get better with time.
One suggestion is to take That Sex Quiz. This is a sexual compatibility quiz for couples that allows you to each answer questions anonymously and discover shared sexual desires in a safe way. In essence, each partner answers a series of questions on things they are and are not interested in doing. If both partners answer “yes” to something, they’re notified. But if only one person answers “yes,” there is no notification. In other words, if you’re interested in doing something in the bedroom and your partner is not, you’ll never be “exposed.” This prevents embarrassment and keeps the focus on things you would both desire.
- Take a Ride Down Memory Lane
Think back to all of the memories you’ve enjoyed together in your relationship. Can you find a way to incorporate these items into a special date? (Or maybe even a series of dates?)
There’s something powerful about nostalgia and memories. By taking a walk down the proverbial memory lane, you can show your partner that you care.
Here are some ideas:
- Plan a getaway to your original honeymoon destination
- Have a picnic at the same place where you proposed
- Go on a “tour of homes” for all of the places you’ve lived together
- Visit the church or wedding venue where you got married and privately renew your vows
- Pick an activity that you used to do together – like golfing or fishing – and try it out again
- As many customer experiences, health coaching is a great way if you want to get a fitness training program together.
Special dates and experiences like these will remind the two of you why you’re in love in the first place.
- Laugh a Little (Or a Lot)
You’ve probably heard the saying that laughter is the best medicine. But did you know that this might actually be true? Research shows:
- Laughter relaxes the entire body and can provide relief from physical tension and stress for up to 45 minutes after.
- Laughter boosts your immunity by decreasing stress hormones and increasing immune cells and antibodies that fight off infections.
- Laughter triggers the release of endorphins in the body (which are the body’s natural “feel-good” chemicals. Not only do endorphins make you feel better, but they may also temporarily relieve pain.
- Laughter is shown to improve the functioning of the cardiovascular system, heart, and individual blood vessels.
In addition to these physical benefits, laughter also helps strengthen connections between people. The more you laugh together, the stronger your relationship becomes. Try spending more time laughing together by attending comedy clubs, improv performances, or comedy films.
Keep Your Marriage Fresh
Don’t let your marriage go stale. Keep things fresh by continually investing in the relationship and trying new things. Not only will you rediscover that spark, but you’ll also continually reaffirm your love to one another through your commitment to the relationship.
Speaks from heart, always too passionate and driven by emotions. Spins the words with kindness & sharpness, intriguing your ever-inscrutable minds.