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Getting to Know Yourself: How to Learn Who You Really Are


Do you ever look in the mirror and feel like you don’t know the person you see? Keep reading to learn how you can get to know yourself on a deeper level.

Americans are more unhappy than ever before. But we’re more connected than ever and have access to more conveniences than at any point in history. So why are so many people struggling?

If you can relate, it may be because you simply haven’t taken the time to get to know yourself. If you don’t know who you are, what you want, and what you don’t want from your life, how can you feel content and satisfied?

Read on to learn how you can learn how to know who you are. 

How to Learn Who You Are

When you’re constantly busy, always connected, and never take the time for self-reflection, it’s easy to go through life without knowing who you are. 

Here are some ways you can stop feeling lost and get to know yourself:

Be Still 

You can’t find out who you are if you never take the time to simply be alone with yourself. You may find that silence and alone time is scary, and you find it deeply uncomfortable. 

This is normal at first, but it takes stillness and silence to be completely truthful with yourself and understand why you are the way you are.

Talk to a Professional

Often, we’re simply not equipped to dive deep into questions like ‘Who am I?’ and ‘Why am I the way I am?’ A trained therapist can help you through this journey, so you can understand not only who you are, but what occurred in your life to make you this way (both good and bad). 

Therapy can also prevent you from repeating past mistakes, and help you form new, better habits. 

Get Feedback

While it’s important to do the tough work yourself so you can find out who you are, feedback is also hugely helpful.

Talk to close friends and family members who you trust. Ask them two questions: ‘What weaknesses do I need to work on’, and ‘what things do you admire about me?’ 

Take all opinions with a grain of salt, but if you’re hearing similar feedback from those closest to you, it’s a great opportunity to use this information.

Know Your Values

Your personal values help determine who you are as a person. They’re what you use to determine what is constructive, desirable, useful, important, and beneficial. Once you know what your core values are, you can use them to determine what your priorities are in life.

Learning what values are the most important to you is key to making sure your daily life is aligned with those values. 

While thinking about your values, ask yourself ‘what makes you happy.’ This isn’t fleeting happiness, like the endorphins you get from eating chocolate or the pleasure from your favorite TV series. Think about what true, lasting happiness looks like for you.

Do You Know Yourself?

The above steps are just the beginning when it comes to learning to know yourself. Self-knowledge is a life-long process, but by taking the time to work on these skills, you’ll likely be much happier. 

To get started, check out some of our self-improvement blog posts today.