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How to Say No to Someone Special

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Have you been stressing too much about how you will decline a favor from family members, friends, or your special someone? Can’t you think of a good way how to say no to people you love?

There’s really no easy way to refuse someone special. You can simply say no, but then you’ll feel guilty and worried that you might hurt them. Even if their understanding is deep and there’s no guarantee that you’ll say yes, they can still get disappointed. As social creatures who desire to maintain a good relationship, people tend to avoid making others feel bad. So, we often preserve a healthy relationship with someone and try to please them.

However, it’s hard to keep trying to keep others pleased. If you always agree to every request you receive from them, you’ll eventually feel exhausted, and it won’t be good for you. So today, we will reveal tips on how you can nicely say no to someone you care about.

Why Is It Okay to Refuse People You Love?

It might be challenging to figure out how to decline if someone special asks you to do something. But it’s actually your right to make your choices, and there’s really nothing wrong with saying no. Below are the reasons why: 

You Need to Take Care of Your Well Being

Feeling guilty about saying no to someone you love might make you worried and guilty. But you need to set boundaries. Otherwise, the pressure from doing something you’re not comfortable doing will cause you a lot of stress. It can significantly affect your mental health, as well as your overall well-being. Other people’s feelings, especially those you care about, are essential. But your own matters as well. Thus, don’t keep neglecting how you genuinely feel and sacrifice your health to please others.

If They Care About You, They’ll Understand

It’s okay to do others a favor from time to time if you are willing to. But you definitely don’t have to if you feel like it’s going to burden you. You also have your own work to do and goals in life. If you want to be one of those successful people with peace of mind, you should also know your priorities.

Aside from that, favors are not requirements, and other people’s responsibilities are not yours. There might be disappointments when you get rejected. But someone who genuinely cares about you will try to have a better understanding and won’t stay mad.

4 Tips to Reject People Nicely

If you are having a difficulty saying no to someone you love, you should consider the following tips: 

1. Be Honest About How You Feel

No matter how you say no to others, they will still know your decision in the end. So, it is best just to be honest about how you feel and get straight to the point. However, you should also tell it in a polite way. Whenever other people ask you for a favor and want to decline, you should also tell them why you can’t agree. Here are a few examples:

  • When you receive an offer you don’t like, you can say, “Thank you for the offer. However, I’m not currently interested in doing ________ (what the person is offering you).”
  • If you can’t attend an event you’re invited to, you can say, “That sounds lovely. I really appreciate the invitation. But I can’t go because I have plans for that day (or the reason why you can’t really make it).” (1)

2. Don’t Keep them Waiting

If you already know that you have to say no to someone, it’s best not to wait for too many days before saying no. Try to give your reply as early as possible. Even the most patient people also run out of patience, and if you genuinely want to make them not feel so bad about the rejection, you should give them a quick answer. 

3. Reject them the Way You Want to be Rejected

There might be no good way of rejecting a person. But you should at least try the nicest possible way to say no to someone. Therefore, if you will refuse someone, say it in a way that you want others to do to you. 

4. Speak with Confidence and Authority

When you make a decision, hold onto it. There are times that people tend to waver, especially if the other person asking is just too special for them. But your choices have consequences. If you don’t want to handle such responsibility, you need to be firm and let the person know that it’s a final decision. (2)

In Conclusion

A people pleaser or a person who wants to maintain a smooth relationship might try to impress others. But the more you keep agreeing to what you don’t want, the more requests you’ll get. So don’t be afraid to tell the other party how you truly feel.