It’s not that I don’t want to fall in love. It’s not that I am afraid of getting hurt.
I just want to find happiness on my own. I want to search for myself and find out what makes me smile in life. I want to find that kind of happiness that doesn’t fade away after just one heartbreak. I want to be my own source of happiness. I want my soul to be fulfilled on its own. I want my heart to flourish without having someone else water it.
I want to be self-sufficient in my happiness. I want to depend only on myself. I want to be my own spark maker. I want to see the world in rose-colored lenses even when I am on my own. I want to feel that tingly feeling in my stomach even if I am single. I want to be my own reason to wake up in the morning. I want to fall in love with myself and do everything in my power to make my journey worthwhile.
I want to have my life together. I want to have control over my feelings. I want to be enough. I don’t want to fall down on my knees and despair if someone decides to leave me. I don’t want my whole world to be built on the foundation of someone else’s. I want to be independently happy with who I am and what I do. I want to be my own brightest star.
It’s not that I don’t want to fall in love. Don’t get me wrong. The thing is… I no longer want to hurt myself loving someone else. I want to walk into love. But first I want to be love. I want to be full of everything that I crave for. I want to be full of joy, tranquility, peacefulness, and love. I want to feel enough. And I want to be complete. I want to shine with this happiness that would never ever be destroyed by some other person.
Even If I fall in love with someone, I want to know that I will be fine on my own.
If I choose to be with you, if I decide to let you come into my life, I will love you right back. I will give you everything that I have to offer, and I will share my life with you. My happiness will be yours. Your joy will become mine. But if one day our paths cross, I want to know that I will be completely fine on my own. I want to be sure that my life won’t come crashing down.
Because together we can create a fire. We can lift each other up and support one another.
But I know that alone, I have the power to create fireworks.
And I won’t let anyone stop me!
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