This Is What Girls In Their 20s Need To Hear About Friendship From Women In Their 40s

Few things make our lives fulfilling, happy, and exciting as the friendships we have. Your friends are the people that have a deep, powerful influence on your happiness and fulfillment. They’re the people who have a great role in your life and undoubtedly, a special place in your heart.

Your friends are the people you build a strong, deep connection with. The people who are the most comfortable to be with. The people who are there for you when you need them. The people with whom you create sweet, happy, precious memories that last a lifetime. The people who know all your annoying habits, insecurities, and fears and never judge you for them. Instead, they accept and cherish you for who you are. 

While it’s true that friendships make life easier and more fulfilling, it’s also true that they’re not meant to be flawless. Therefore, you need to make sure you invest time and energy in your friendships. You need to make sure you nurture them.

So, we talked to a couple of 40-year-old women who have managed to establish deep, firm, long friendships and we asked them how they did it.

Here’s what they told us:

1. Don’t talk about each other – talk to each other instead.

Of course, exchanging the recent gossip over a cup of coffee is sometimes inevitable. But, don’t let this become a habit. Instead of wasting your time talking about others behind their back, talk to each other about your priorities, goals, desires, and problems.

2. Always make time for your friends.

It’s not like you have to hang out with your friends 24/7. But, make sure they never feel ignored or neglected because you always have more important things to do than spend time with them. Being in their presence and talking with them nurtures your soul.

3. Always remember that friendships are as important as your romantic relationships and the relationships you have with your family.

4. Always be open with your friends.

Always be sincere about your feelings in your conversations with your friends. Express your opinions and ideas clearly and directly no matter how much they differ from those of your friends. Remember: close, deep, lifelong friendships are only built between honest, trustworthy individuals.

5. Remember that fights are what make a friendship healthy and deep.

Instead of pretending that everything is okay and sweeping problems under the carpet every time you want to complain about something your friends said or did to you, have an open conversation with them. Tell them clearly what it is they do that hurts your feelings. But, also make sure you do this in a calm, civilized, mature manner.

6. Don’t use your friends as your punching bag.

Yes, your friends are supposed to be there when you want to share your problems with them or complain about your strict boss or jealous coworker. But, that doesn’t mean that you can vent your frustration on them whenever you feel upset or angry.

7. When talking with your friends, get rid of distractions.

Whether it’s your phone, your laptop, or you name it, make sure you focus on what your friend tells you in your conversations. Concentrate on the person standing in front of you and enjoy the time you spend with them and don’t let unimportant things, such as social media, prevent you from it.

8. Know that sometimes your friends know what is best for you.

Your friends know your weak sides. They know your vulnerabilities and fears. But, they also know your soul, your qualities, and strength. Therefore, when you make decisions, don’t forget to take into consideration their advice. Because remember – the only thing they want is to see you feeling content with your choices.

9. Don’t hide things from your friends.

Don’t keep secrets. A true friend will never betray your trust. Therefore, tell your friends everything about you. Sharing your secrets with them will only strengthen your friendship.

10. Your friends make the difficult times in your life a little bit easier.

Your friends may not always be able to help you solve your problems. But, know that they’ll always be there to give you their help and support. They’ll always be there to comfort you and tell you, “everything is going to be okay.” They’ll always be there to remind you of your strength and that you don’t have to deal with your problems and pain alone.

11. Your friendships make your successes worth celebrating.

Your successes and achievements don’t mean anything unless you have genuine, caring people by your side to share them with.

12. True friends bring out the best in you.

They make you a better person. They encourage you to learn and grow. They inspire you to work on yourself until you become the best version of yourself.