There is a great difference between being alone and being lonely. A loner will always prefer being alone, but they will never feel lonely.
Loners are a unique type of people. They prefer having a smaller circle of friends, and they do not mind spending time alone, being with themselves. So, unlike those who feel lonely, loners never feel lonely.
In fact, being in their own company makes them feel most fulfilled, as this is when they are most in touch with themselves. Loners are very self-aware, and perhaps this is why they prefer to be alone. (1)
You have probably asked yourself this question and felt weird because you do not understand the nature of loners. Loners are not bad people. They have very good personality characteristics, in fact.
And maybe you have been wondering why you enjoy being alone most of the time, and whether there is something wrong with you. No, you are not crazy. Nothing is wrong with you. And below is a list of reasons that will help you understand why you enjoy your own company the most.
A loner always exercises strong and healthy boundaries. They can understand themselves perfectly, which allows them to set clear ideas and strong values. They know that they are never alone, as even if they are the last person on earth, they have themselves.
Therefore, they will respect their boundaries (and those of others) and let you know if you are about to cross them. In the end, if you are not faithful to yourself, you cannot be faithful to anyone.
A loner does not crave the company of others the way many do. However, once they get to like someone and want them as a close friend, they become the most loyal of friends you can find.
They know how to value their worth, and if they find you to be worthy of being their friend, they will gladly give an arm for you when necessary. They exercise their loyalty in all fields in life, be it relationships, work, family, you name it.
Of course, they can also be loyal to those that they don’t know. A worthy cause can garner their support as well, and they are often the first to donate. For instance, the American Red Cross holiday giving campaign – focused on providing relief to disaster victims this year – will bring in many dollars from this personality type.
Even if they like being alone, this does not make them rigid and closed. On the contrary, loners are very open-minded, and they are always up for new ideas and activities. A loner will not spend their lives in their room, or with the same beliefs and opinions.
They enjoy exploring new ideas and activities, and they do not mind trying out different things in life. However, they will ensure that they have had their alone time before taking up things that involve many people.
Loners are amazingly strong and sober when challenging situations come in the way. Their strong focus and willpower come from their frequent self-reflection during their alone time.
They may feel overwhelmed by stressful situations, but instead of wasting their time on distractions, they will decide to spend some alone time and recharge. They devise solutions to the problem and ways to cope with it during this time.
While many people choose to ignore their thoughts and emotions, loners choose to indeed focus on them and become fully aware of them. Being aware of oneself is very important and something which is very difficult to achieve.
Loners know themselves better than anyone else, allowing them to understand those around them better. Of course, everyone has periods of depressive and discouraging thoughts, but loners are able to navigate through them and learn their lesson.
If something is essential for a loner, it is time. They respect and value their time and that of those around them. In truth, time is the most critical asset for success in life, and they are well aware of it.
This is why they will do everything in their power to never be late, never waste someone’s time, and never allow others to waste their time. They are categorical when the time comes into question, and it is perhaps their most valued boundary that they will never change.
Loners avoid trivialities and fake behavior. They never tolerate people who think that they can be played with. They are very self-aware, and you can learn a lot from them about self-respect.
Respect their time as they respect yours, and respect their boundaries the way they respect yours. If you know how to connect with a loner, expect a genuine friendship filled with loyalty, great advice, and respect.
I like being alone. And I guess as I get older, I like being alone even more. I enjoy my own company, and the time spent with myself makes me happy and fills me with positive energy. So, yes, I am alone, but I am not lonely. On the contrary, I love the silence, the quietness, the peace. Plus, I get to experience all the wonderful things that occur when someone learns to love being alone.
When you are all alone, you don’t have any distractions. You can relax and clear your mind after a long workday. You can recharge your batteries and revitalize your energy, body, and soul.
When you learn to love being alone, you will also learn to become your best friend. You will learn to trust yourself. You will recognize your strengths and abilities to deal with anything that comes your way, good or bad.
When you are spending time alone, you can start thinking and reflecting about your life – where you are right now and where you wish to be. You can also discover the ways to improve yourself and your life so that you get anything you want out of your life.
When you embrace being alone, then your true powers emerge. You start realizing what you are capable of. Moreover, you become stronger because you know you are on your own when it comes to solving every problem that emerges in your life.
When you are alone, you will also have a clearer view of your emotions. When you spend that much time on your own, you will, in turn, become able to hear your thoughts and the deepest desires of your heart.
When you are alone, you have all the freedom you want and to do whatever you want to do. You can wear any clothes you want, eat whatever you like, and spend your time in any activity you love and that makes you happy.
When you are alone, you can relax, and your mind will relax as well. And when your mind is free from toxic and negative thoughts, you will naturally feel more positive and happier.
Being alone makes you more focused and determined to finish whatever task you started. When you are fully concentrated, you will get to do more things because you are free of distractions. When you start spending more time alone, your productivity levels will sky-rocket.
By spending more time alone, you will also start seeing other people in a new light. You will begin to appreciate every contact you make with another person and get to truly enjoy their presence.
When you are alone, you get to know yourself on another level. You are better able to tap into the deepest part of you and truly understand yourself, what you need, what you love, what makes you happy… All these things are essential for your well-being and your interaction with others because you will be able to set stronger boundaries and other people will respect you for it.
When you embrace being alone, you will realize that the number of people around you doesn’t matter. What matters is who you surround yourself with. You will also realize that it is better to have a small, carefully chosen group of friends you are close with than to have a bunch of acquaintances to waste your time.
Spending a lot of time alone will provide you with the confidence you need to do everything for yourself. You will learn not to depend on anyone to make you happy or do things for you. You will become independent and more capable of accomplishing what you desire.
When you are happy in your own company, you don’t need anyone, especially not someone who takes you for granted and doesn’t appreciate you. However, when it comes to love, your boundaries are clearly set, and you don’t let anyone take advantage of you.
When you love your own company, the bond you have with yourself is so strong that you stop being afraid of ending up alone. Because, when you are alone you are so happy and fulfilled that you don’t feel like you need another person to make you feel complete.
When you love being alone, your connection with yourself improves and thus your relationship with other people improves as well. You can be connected on a deeper level with others and understand them better because you are free of judgment and negativity. You will also become a great listener since you have got accustomed to listening to your own thoughts without interrupting yourself.
When you realize your own value, you don’t need anyone to tell you how much worthy you are. Plus, you stop seeking approval and validation from others because when you are alone, you stop feeling the need to show off to the world.
When you love being alone, you also start loving your life even more. In turn, your life gets better and you get more fulfilled. You start taking ownership of your life and you learn that the power to improve your life and achieve your goals lies in you.
When you learn to love being alone, you will find your true happiness. And it will be a different kind of happiness, like nothing you have experienced before. It will be a kind of happiness that comes from within, happiness that comes from feeling complete.
And that’s the beauty of being alone.
Yes, it is perfectly normal to desire to be alone. Everyone needs their own space and alone time. However, the quantity of the desired alone time differs from person to person. We are not the same; thus, some people may want to be more on their own, while others need less alone time and more time socializing with others. Both of these groups of people are normal.
However, I must mention that the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic are catastrophic to some people because our everyday life has been drastically interrupted and altered. Namely, if you live with your family, you have to spend more time together with your family. On the other hand, if you live alone, then you have probably felt more alone than ever.
We all want a different kind of ‘alone.’ Some like to be alone with their thoughts. Some want to read a book. Some want to walk alone. And even though there are people who think that being seen alone eating at a restaurant is embarrassing, let me tell you – it is not!
You are free to do whatever you want to do with your time. If you want to be alone, there is no shame about it.
And that is normal.
As for me, I love being alone. Below I will share with you why I prefer being alone.
Why do I want to be alone all the time? My friends ask me this question, and I can honestly say I don’t know the exact answer. But I do know this. BEING ALONE MAKES ME HAPPY.
And I decided that it was time for me to follow my heart and do things that make me happy. And most of the things include me being on my own and enjoying my solitude. And the majority of people still think that you need someone to make you happy, so they can’t understand that some of us don’t need anyone to make us happy. Some people are happy and fulfilled by themselves.
So, if you too are like me and prefer being alone, I want you to know that nothing is wrong with you. Don’t try to fit in. Don’t let other people tell you what you should do.
As Charlotte Bronte, in her dear novel Jane Eyre, said, “I care for myself. The more solitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more I will respect myself.” So, maybe that’s the key to being truly happy and at peace with oneself.
If you want to spend a weekend by yourself over going out with your friends – do it without apologizing for it. Don’t feel guilty. It is your decision on how you will spend your free time.
Remember, it is your life.
As for me, I want to be left alone most of the time, and I don’t care what other people think. I know that I need that time with myself, and I won’t apologize for it.
I want to be alone, and I am happy being alone. Period.
To our alone time! Cheers!
Copyright © Curious Mind Magazine
