We all remember the teacher’s advice: “Write everything you know on the subject and don’t leave an empty space”. But what should you do when you don’t have a clue about a single question on the exam.

Should you accept the defeat and retake the exam or should you at least try to get the teacher’s sympathy by using little creativity. I suggest you do the second one.

That way even if you fail the exam both you and your teacher will acknowledge your creative side.

Sources:
twentytwowords.com
brightside.me

Have you ever met a guy who got attached after the first kiss from a girl he liked? Do you know any man who got clingy after a phone call of the girl he met at the bookstore?

Biology and genetics have a great impact on how we get attached and how fast we do it. Women get attached very easily and in no time.

If they like you, the other second they might imagine their future with you. They sometimes turn to “obsession” in a relationship.

The influence of oxytocin and vasopressin

Newest 21^st century studies reveal great information about romantic relationship that help us understand the somewhat clingy nature of women.

The studies surprised us with a great discovery about orgasms and how these cause oxytocin and vasopressin to be released from the hypothalamus (the part of the brain dealing with pleasure).

This releasing has a much greater influence when it comes to women, and, therefore, the attachment crisis is stronger.

Despite the obvious oxytocin, there are many other biological reasons why women get attached so readily in relationships with men. Their nature is completely opposite of men’s.

What happens in a woman’s brain?

When it comes to biology, it is confirmed that female orgasms last longer than male ones and they are two minutes on average, whereas male ones last for only a few seconds.

Gert Holstege’s 2005 study claims that when females orgasm, astonishing things happen in the female brain. Some of the regions completely shut down.

These include the regions for fear, anxiety, and behavior control. These parts are in the amygdala and hippocampus, where emotion regions are as well.

With this in mind, anxiety and alertness are also decreased. It may sound like a state of being emotionless, but it sure causes women to start being attached to their partners.

Women’s brains receive this energy and that’s how they immediately start even planning a future with the guy they just met.

Women like attention

Women also like to get attention from their partners. It may happen that they get attached from even a simple look, or a smile, or a given flower. They don’t require a lot. Little attention will make them consider you as their future husband.

Women want things fast

Women like when things go fast in relationships. The moment they set their eyes on a guy, they can’t slow down. They are absolutely certain of their feelings and they go and get the guy they like. For most of men, this seems like rushing, but when a girl sets her mind on you, she will go fast.

Women are emotional

Also, women are very emotional creatures. We are not saying that men aren’t, but biology confirms women are on the top list. When hormones reach a certain point in their bodies, they can cry for no reason, and start having extreme feelings about a new relationship. 

The truth is that they really can’t control these hormonal changes that happen every month and make them more emotional than men. That’s why a girl is more likely to stay attached after a relationship break-up even though she knows that guy is not for her.

Women are nurturers

Women received the love and care from their mothers, and it automatically transferred to them. Some women love to take care of people just because of that reason. It is how they were taught. They possess a certain power when it comes to nurturing the people they love. When they meet a new guy, they start doing this from the very first date, kiss, or hug. They get attached unnoticeably.

Women are dreamers

In all areas of women’s lives, they dream a little bit every single day. They dream about their health, they dream about their eating habits, and they dream about their relationships.

Every girl’s dream is different. Some dream of getting married to the perfect one, some dream of having a child, but most of them dream of getting the best for them.

If they enter a new relationship, it is because they think they are going to fulfill this dream. Something in that person made them feel like that’s the dream they need to live. As a result, they cling strongly to this new relationship and try to do their best to stay attached.

Women get influenced

This is particularly true for most of the girls’ best friends. Girls talk includes all the details of their relationship lives and they like to share everything with their girlfriends.

Not only that, but their best friends may have a go at deciding on whether a girl should enter a new relationship or not.

Friends may start planning your future with the new guy, while you still don’t even know you like him. This drama may go on, and you as a woman start attaching yourself to this guy so quickly and for no good reasons.

Women like to get attached

The truth in the end is that women love getting attached. When it is about love life, women are doing their best and they are not pretending.

Their wish for attachment is huge. When they like you, they want to get attached, and this sometimes looks scary, but it is all in women’s biological nature.

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Rhonda Byrne has taught us that the key to happiness are positive thoughts. As we go through life, we learn that the harder you try to obtain something, the better your chances are of achieving it.

The more you study, the higher your grades and accomplishments. The harder you work the better results you will receive. From an early age, we have been raised to think that life is a numbers game.

The more you put into the equation, the more you get out of it. Can we really view happiness from the same perspective?

It only makes sense to think that the more effort you put into being happy, the happier you will be.

When you are feeling agitated and angry, thinking positive thoughts should help you feel more relaxed and peaceful, right?

Wrong. Try telling yourself repeatedly that you are happy, while relentlessly feeling anger piling up inside.

The harder you push, the worse it gets. We think that forcing ourselves to think and feel optimistically will relieve the anguish, but all that does is actually backfire.

Choosing to ignore negative feelings is the same as leaving garbage pile up and pretending it is not there. You may decide to disregard it for a while, but it is only a matter of time until it spills over and starts to smell.

The same thing happens to our emotions. When we sweep them under the rug, deliberately failing to acknowledge their very existence, they tend to explode eventually.

However, what we fail to realize is that only giving praise to our positive emotions and completely blocking our negative ones only makes us less relentless.

While choosing to ignore the negative emotions stirring up in our subconscious, they come back enlarged in other magnitudes.

According to Harvard medical School psychologist and professor Susan David’s book “Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change and Thrive in Work and Life,” emotions need to be handled, both negative and positive.She explains that instead of piling our baggage in the closet, we ought to give it more meaning, without attaching ourselves to it and allowing it to consume us.

This way, we can not only handle the issue at hand, but also learn from it. Anger and frustration can be two of our greatest teachers that disclose our true core values in life. David debates that this is the best way to build the best version of yourself.

In an interview she did for The Washington Post, David states, “A lot of our cultural dialogue is fundamentally avoidant, so people will just say things like, “just be positive and things will be fine.”

“The tyranny of positivity” was what a friend of mine called it. She recently died of cancer, and what she meant was if being in remission was just a matter of positive thinking, then all of her friends in her breast cancer support group would be alive today.

By sending out the message that our thoughts are responsible for creating our health, well-being, and reality, we are overvaluing the power of our thoughts, while making people feel culpable when something bad happens to them. They feel it is because they weren’t positive enough.

What is actually guaranteed in life is that it will not go well sometimes. You’re healthy, until you’re not healthy. You’re with the person you love, until you’re not with the person you love. You enjoy your job, until you don’t.

We will find ourselves in situations where we will feel anger, sadness and grief and so on. Unless we can process, navigate and be comfortable with the full range of our emotions, we won’t learn to be resilient.

We must have some practice dealing with those emotions or we will be caught off guard. I believe the strong cultural focus on happiness and thinking positively is actually making us less resilient.”

Forcing yourself to be happy is like fighting with a bull. You know you cannot win, but you do it anyway. You force yourself until you lose all control and let the bull win.

Giving too much priority to positive thinking only gives value to positive things, meaning we are not allowed to feel agony. Nonetheless, we are only human and being human means allowing yourself to feel angry, guilty, and even furious.

It is not wrong to feel this way. However, it is wrong to allow it to eat you up inside. Whenever we give emotions too much meaning or not at all, they grow, whether consciously or subconsciously.

According to Susan, “emotional agility builds our capacity to engage our inner world in a way that is courageous, curious and compassionate. 

“Whereas positive thinking and avoidance have overemphasized the role of our thoughts, emotional agility is a skill set that builds on our ability to face our emotions, label them, understand them and then choose to move forward deliberately.

It is the ability to recognize when you’re feeling stressed, be able to step out of your stress, and then decide how to act in a way that is congruent with your personal values and aligned with your goals.”

Therefore, allowing yourself to feel the negative emotional turmoil as well as the wonderful, flamboyant feelings prepares you for a healthier, more peaceful mindset.

Forcing ourselves to do something has always backfired, and this is no exception. If you are ferocious, give yourself space to feel it, acknowledge it, distance yourself from it in order to understand it and move on.

This will grant you the pass into a more meaningful life, less filled with agony and more filled with unflappable tranquility.

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Every parent wants to see their child grow into a successful and complete person. This is why parents never spare time, money and effort on their kids continually.

For many parents, this means investing in their children’s education from early age, but the question is: Is good education really a pledge for a bright future?

Despite the fact that diplomas and achievements are required from a person to be able to advance in their career, certain skills determine the success of that same person in achieving any goal they set their minds on.

These skills are learned from young age and they are one of the key factors for a successful future.

1. THE ABILITY TO TAKE A STAND

Having their back is not enough. Helping your kids to learn how to take a stand even when nobody is around them to save the day is one of the most important skills a person can possess.

To start nurturing this skill in your child, you need to show your child that their opinion matters within the family.

Your child needs to know that you hear and understand them, so never be too short on time or words when it comes to listening to them and showing that you understand them and that you acknowledge their opinion.

Express genuine interest and encourage them to give reasons and examples when stating their opinion. Always be ready to discuss their ideas in a curious and calm manner, use words of approval more often and don’t be sarcastic or adamant when answering their questions.

2. CONCENTRATION

Children prefer to focus on what they are interested in at the moment. This trait is a great advantage when it comes to encouraging concentration and focus.

Of course, children see a role model in their parents subconsciously, which means that you need to show your focus and concentration when communicating with them.

When teaching them something or just having a simple conversation with them, remember to pay them a few minutes of your attention entirely, without any distractions.

Certain activities will help your child to learn to be more concentrated and focused. For example, when teaching them writing, ask them to draw letters on 3rd & 4th grade writing worksheets, on a whiteboard, the pavement or sculpt them out of Plasticine.

Playing board games, puzzles or drawing are also very good techniques which can improve their concentration.

In addition to all this, ask your child to notice interesting details during walks, on their way to school or just about anywhere. Tell them to look for interesting signs, cars of a certain color or model, or for different shapes, colors, and textures.

2. 2. 3. SELF-RELIANCE

It’s very important that your child learns to do things by themselves.The sooner they learn this, the more confident they will be in the future. This skill will help them cope with obligations even from an early age (for example, at school).

Think of the things that your child can do for himself/herself, such as tieing their own shoelaces, dressing themselves up, putting their toys in their places or cleaning up after themselves.

Don’t scold your children for their mistakes! Skip that part and show understanding, but also ask for a responsible behavior in return.

Tell them to think of a way they can correct that ‘mistake’ and don’t forget to be patient and encouraging. Most of all, don’t forget to praise them (the higher the difficulty, the bigger the praise).

2. 2. 4. BEING A TEAM PLAYER

There are things that a person cannot do on their own. This is why you should teach your child of the importance of building good relationships with others, showing respect and being ready to collaborate with others.

You can start this in your home, with your child contributing to the greater good of the family (of course, in ways that are appropriate for their age and abilities).

When teaching your child to work in a team, you should NEVER compare them to other kids. This can be very damaging to their self-esteem. Instead, emphasize the importance of each individual and their role in the team.

2. 2. 5. COMMAND OF FOREIGN LANGUAGES

The saying ‘The more languages you know, the more people you are worth’ is not there in vain. A command of at least two languages is a very good key to success, not only because of the knowledge of a language, but also because of the expanded horizons your child will have because of knowing a second language.

Young age is the best time to start learning a new language, as children possess the ability to absorb every new word on a subconscious level and produce the language they are learning with greater ease and confidence. So, if you haven’t already, give your child the opportunity to learn a new language as soon as possible.

2. 2. 6. SELF-ORGANIZATION

Self-organization is very important in the daily life of every person. This means better chances of success in everything they undertake, as there would be no dead weight being dragged behind from all the overdue activities.

The basis of self-organization lies in a well organized schedule. Plan a daily and weekly schedule with your children, while gradually reducing your involvement in the planning as your children mature and learn to manage their time by themselves.

It’s very important to strike a balance between your child’s responsibilities and leisure time. This means setting the basis of the work-life balance from an early age. A child should have enough time for games, hobbies and other desired activities and this should go hand to hand with their chores, obligations and responsibilities.

Build this balance from early age, when the ‘hard part’ is not present too much, so they can gradually understand the need for that balance.

2. 2. 7. QUIET ATTITUDE TO FAILURES

Your child’s attitude towards failures and victories will inevitably shape their self-esteem and define their relationships with other people. This means that your child needs to learn to approach both failures and victories soberly and responsibly.

Think of the way a child’s play is followed: someone loses, throws a tantrum, and the parents take the child home. This kind of behavior can have a negative impact on your child’s ability to face the difficulties of life.

While praising your kid’s successes, don’t ignore their failures. Failures are a very important element of life and you should teach them to approach them with scrutiny.

Try to discuss the failure and find the reasons that lie behind it. Of course, first let them express their emotions (to an acceptable level which would not bother other people), and then have a talk about it.

And most importantly, always let your children know that you love them and believe in them no matter what.

SHARING IS CARING!

Have you ever noticed how some people have a tendency to ‘start a conversation’ with themselves every now and then?

If you’ve had such public ‘outburst’ yourself, then you certainly remember the reaction of those who overheard your little ‘dialog’, clearly thinking you are a ‘nut job’.

Hold your horses – there is no need to be alarmed. It is true that this behavioral trait can be associated with lunacy, but science says it can also be regarded as a hallmark of a genius.

Numerous studies have explored this phenomenon and found that talking to yourself can actually boost your ability to process and store information. In other worlds, talking to yourself will not only help you learn more quickly and efficiently, but it will also improve your long-term memory.

These findings were recently backed by a study that was published in the Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology, which found that ‘verbal stimulation’ positively influences our perceptual processing abilities.

The study asked participants to repeat the name of certain objects aloud and concluded that such verbal stimulation helped them become more receptive to these objects, allowing them to locate the objects much easier.

Scientists are adamant that talking to ourselves is actually useful in more than one way. 

1. Talking to Yourself Boosts Your Brain Power

A recent experiment that was conducted by Live Science found that subjects who repeated names of objects were not only able to find these objects in question much quicker, but also exhibited an improved ability to memorize.

In laymen’s terms, this means that talking to yourself will prepare your body for the task ahead, allowing it to complete the job more easily.

2. It Helps Children Learn Better

Children, especially toddlers and babies, greatly benefit from the so called ‘self-directed speech’.

Scientists believe that it helps guide children’s behavior, claiming that vocalizing directions allows them to approach a problem more methodically while also making them more adept at following them later in life.

3. It Will Help You Make Better Choices and Organize Your Thoughts
   

Psychologist Linda Sapadin claims that talking to yourself can help you make better decisions. According to her, this vocal ‘exercise’ not only helps de-clutter the mind, but also validates important decisions and calms the nerves.

It also helps prioritize tasks and improves our decision making.

4. It Will Make You More Ambitious

Repeating your goals and ambitions aloud will reinforce your determination to achieve them and rid your mind from unnecessary distractions.

In doing so, you basically break down your goal into a series of individual, clear steps that you will be able to tackle much more easily than approaching the problem head on. This will stimulate your brain to work harder to achieve the end goal.

So, next time you feel weird or out of place for “thinking out loud” or debating with yourself, don’t dwell on it. Turns out, it’s a good thing.

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Sources:
http://elitedaily.com
Self-directed speech affects visual search performance, The Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology,DOI:10.1080/17470218.2011.647039