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How To Reduce Stress And Change The Energy Around You With This Unique Technique!

By
Elizabeth Williams

There are those stressful moments and situations when you can’t do anything but wait for the surroundings to change so you can help yourself by reducing that stress the way you do it best.

Well not anymore – this technique gives you the opportunity to face and fight off stress in ANY situation, be it work, meeting, exam (you name it).

This technique uses the power of the heart chakra to heal the mixed emotions and bring you to a state of balance and peace.

The best part is you will be able to affect the energy of the whole area around you and change the way things are happening to help the others as well. It is a very simple and subtle technique which won’t create confused looks and awkward feelings, as it doesn’t require any special movements or gestures.

Let’s Try It Out!

 It is very simple and no one will notice you doing it. Just follow these directions and help yourself instantly when you need inner peace the most.

  1. Place your hand above the center of your chest, just make it look natural with no sudden movements. This is where your heart chakra is (if you want to know more about the chakras go here[hyperlink]).
  2. Take a calm, deep breath and repeat these phrases in your head:
  3. “I’m OK, no matter what happens.”
  4. “Everybody’s OK, no matter what happens.”
  5. “We’re all OK, no matter what happens.”
  6. Repeat these phrases and feel the energy shift – offer that new energy to the space and the people you’re with.

This mantra is quite literally the reality of your soul – the things happening which trigger stress are just opening a space of your Self which requires your work on it, by facing it and understanding it, coming at peace with it.

So when you do this technique remember that you are OK and that all that is happening is a trigger, not for stress, but for something which will help you become a better you.

9 Early Reading Habits That Will Make Your Kids Love Books

By
Elizabeth Williams

Reading books is more beneficial than you might think. It is great for mental stimulation, which in terms slows the progress of (or possibly even prevent) the potential risk of Alzheimer’s or Dementia, it reduces stress, it enriches your knowledge, expands your vocabulary, improves your memory, strengthens your analytical skills, improves your focus and concentration, and the list goes on.

So, nurturing this habit in your kids will be something they will be grateful about when they grow up. In an age of computers and smartphones, where reading books experiences an enormous decline among young children and teenagers, it is very important that you, as parents, start promoting this healthy habit among your children and grant them a gift like no other money can buy.

So how can you create these healthy reading habits in your child? Just follow these steps and be creative by inventing others as well.

Find books with rich illustrations – not photos!

 Books with simple photos and minimal text are the least helpful ones for children under age 5. They don’t trigger as many conversation starters and these are critical to child development. So, find books with rich illustrations and let your and your child’s creativity come to full bloom.

Ask questions based on the illustrations

Illustrations can help children enrich their vocabulary, especially at the age between 16 and 24 months, as during that period, they add more words to their vocabulary daily than they do at any other age. They start with learning the easiest words, such as nouns like “dog” and “tree”. So, if you see a picture of a dog, ask questions as “Where is the dog? Do you see it?” “What is the dog doing?” “What color is it?” The base knowledge of nouns helps kids construct sentences with other parts of speech more quickly, so “dog” will turn into “brown dog” and eventually “brown dog runs.”

Point out the obvious

Kids have still no idea about what you may take for granted as an adult: things such as the author’s name, what an author does, how to hold a book, reading sentences from left to right, turning pages. Share these basic steps with your child to help them read independently when they are ready.

Cuddling and reading are a perfect pair

Cuddling helps your child associate reading with the feeling of closeness and comfort. This will build up their self-confidence about reading, especially out loud.

Relate the content to real life

 Relating a book’s plot to a real-life situation your child has experienced will help your child remember the book and the vocabulary better. So, if you’re reading a book about Jamie going to the zoo, start a conversation about the last time your child went to the zoo with you. For children over the age 3, you can ask open-ended questions (who, what, where and why) to create a dialogue of storytelling.

Spark a conversation

What’s more important than finishing the entire book is the conversation you have during reading. Responding to questions (even those never-ending ones) and talking with your child will help them develop their cognitive skills and social development in the real world. You can decide to stop reading at any moment which is convenient for a rich conversation and let the conversation flow from there.

Imitate voices and make silly sounds

Your child will adore your silly side when it comes to onomatopoeias such a Moooo! Ring, ring! Knock, knock! Bang! So don’t feel afraid to say them in the right moment. The variety of sounds and voices will lead to your child recognizing phonemes, or sound units that make up larger words. It will in term help your child speak full words.

Ask prediction questions

“What do you think the cat will do after it drinks the milk?” “What toy do you think Jessie will choose?” This kind of questions helps your child to learn to read on their own. Later, when your child picks up a chapter book for the first time, they won’t have any trouble finding the page where they left off. This is because this way of communicating while reading makes them remember points in the book. It will also enhance their creativity and their ability to become better narrative storytellers.

Follow their lead

Don’t force your child to sit still and read. This will make them see reading as a punishment, not fun. Just go with the flow of your child’s attention span. If they lose interest, let them run around the house and come back to the book in a few minutes, but don’t give up when they do so – keep on reading and commenting on the story to yourself. They will often come back to you out of curiosity.

5 Simple Stress Relief Strategies That Will Help You Solve Your Problems

By
Elizabeth Williams

Are you one of those people who seem to breeze through life with the ease of a butterfly? It seems as if nothing can hold them back and they handle problems as if they were never there in the first place, they face every situation without fear and manage stress in a way most people would never think it is possible.

It is true that it is too easy to get caught up in the negative, the truth is life cannot be all rainbows and sunshine, but the main idea is to know how to face the problems without you becoming a problem to yourself. Make sure you create a positive mental attitude towards any problem, as there are no problems – the only problem is our approach to those situations.

How easy is it to do that? Why not try and have a go at these stress reduction, problem solving techniques – they are guaranteed to make you feel better.

  1. See problems as solvable

With the right attitude, there is no problem which cannot be solved or alleviated. Write down any problems or concerns and think about solutions.

Although we believe we are fighting the problem itself, half of the battle we are fighting is the emotions and mental conflicts the problem brings up. In the heat of our emotions, we only make the problem grow bigger until we become more of a problem to us than the problem itself.

One method of gaining perspective, clarity and cold-headedness is to write the problem down. This gives us the chance to filter the real situation from the emotions that come with it and have the opportunity to reach to the concrete and tangible issue, instead of ourselves. So, here’s what you will do:

  • Write the problem down – out of your system and onto a piece of paper. Really, write all that’s in your head.
  • Now read it and cross off any emotional statements you have made about it.
  • Write it out again, with just the facts, nothing more.
  • Now write a scenario where the issue has been resolved, write several scenarios if needed.
  • Read your solution to the problem. How did you fix it? What steps did you take?
  • This is your plan. Now start working on it.

Giving your emotions some time out and stepping back from all that momentary chaos inside of you is a great way to solve any problem. So, calm down, get that pen out and let the ideas flow.

  1. Life is all about change – accept that

Life is a continuous change, as Heraclitus once said, “Everything changes and nothing remains still … and … you cannot step twice into the same stream.” Knowing this, you need to accept the fact that some things come and go when they should. There is a Zen proverb which says “Let go or be dragged,” and really, new changes come with new challenges and new beautiful things in them, you just need to open your eyes to see and your heart to feel the freshness of the moment. See life as a journey, not a trial.

As a result, you will always take the advantage of change in the right moment – when it comes. Because everything would be boring if it remains the same as it was, wouldn’t it? Grasp the new moment instead of lamenting the one that has already passed.

  1. Fear or rejection is an unnecessary enemy

Of course, rejection and failure may come whenever we decide to try something harder and push our limits. The bad part about it is that this emotion pulls deep at the strings of self-esteem and sense of self-worth. And which is even worse, you keep rewinding the scenario over and over wondering what you could have done differently to change the outcome. The reality is – you cannot change anything at that moment and the best thing to do is to come at peace with it. The path to every success is paved with rejection and failure among other things.

The most important thing is not to be afraid of rejection. Be kind to yourself and know that you will never be able to be perfect for everyone and everything. Perfection as people imagine it does not exist, which means you were not the first nor the last to fail at something. Take a deep breath, focus on something positive, create a good feeling space in your body and stay in it.  From that place, start analyzing what you have learned from that situation – as everything in life is a lesson. What new opportunities arise from that? What’s totally possible now? Be in the present moment, smile and let seeking opportunities and positive possibilities become your second nature.

  1. Live life to the fullest

There is always more to life than work and family or striving to achieve and being in service to others. Don’t let yourself become a slave to just a few directions you’ve set in your life living everything else out of it. Life is whole with all the colors in it, not just a few you find most important.

Give yourself some time for enjoyment, fun and fulfilment in the simple activities that make you happy and alive. You have all the time in the world if you know how to use it wisely and to your advantage. Don’t punish yourself by leaving all the fun out of life, take up activities that include fun and enjoyment, because all your hard work won’t make up for the happiness of the simple things. Take up a hobby and give yourself some time out. Participate in activities simply for the sheer enjoyment and pleasure.

So go on, if you haven’t done it yet, now is the time to take up a hobby and follow your interests and passions. You could even enjoy the sweetness of doing nothing. Once you have brought your mind to a calm and happy state, you will be able to pursue your ambitions and face the challenges that life brings much more easily.

  1. Don’t be afraid to ask for help

I will tell you a story of a father and a son. The father once said to the son: “Do you see that huge rock there? Move it using all your options and abilities.” The son tried as hard as he could, all day. In the end, he gave up and came back to his father saying that he couldn’t move it even for an inch. Then the father asked his son: “Did you use all your options and abilities?” The son said yes, but the father said: “You didn’t. You didn’t ask for my help.”

Never overestimate yourself. Sometimes we do need help from others, and as we would help them, they would help us as well. We as people are meant to do things together. We haven’t come to this part of history and this much power in world because we were the superior species, but because we worked together.

It is time to accept that you cannot bear all the burdens alone – you are not supposed to. Requesting help does not suggest weakness, don’t let that fool you. Weakness is when you are unable to ask for help when needed.

You do need to ask intelligently and be ready for any kind of answer, though. And the best way to do this is to:

  • Let go of your expectations – ask without the need to hear a yes.
  • People CAN say no. If they do, move on and ask for someone else’s help.
  • ASK – don’t demand. Leave out the emotion and drama.
  • Be clear about what you want – ask directly and clearly.
  • Always ask the right person – the one with the willingness, ability and resources to help.

5 Life Lessons You Should Learn Before It’s Too Late

By
Elizabeth Williams

Living a healthy life means living a life full of social interaction, healthy relationships and a life filled with people who make you happy and you return them the same feeling unconditionally. But this is all like a chess game – one wrong move and you lose it all. If your goal is to lead a happy life, you should indeed cultivate connection.

People who enjoy healthy friendships and family relations are happier, have fewer health problems and can overcome stress more easily. When it comes to relationships, it is best that you approach them carefully and with wisdom and understanding.

We’ve created a list of five lessons which may help you improve your social life and strengthen your relationships with the blink of an eye.

  1. Instead of trying to fix them, accept them.

If your first choice is to try to change the people you’ve grown fond of, think again, as you might lose them. This refers to our partners, friends, parents and grown children who have already shaped their personality and habits. What you may perceive as being ‘right’ may be ‘wrong’ in the eyes of the others, and reality is but what we make of it – our perception and our personality and habits define it, just as the other people’s do. Our efforts to ‘correct’ someone else usually backfires, as it gives the other person the sense that we perceive ourselves as being smarter and better than them, posing ourselves as superior to them. This sense creates resentment and rejection and brings no change at all.

Instead of ‘fixing’ them, try looking inward to fix the problem. Ask yourself what can you make out of the situation and how can you create a compromise between the different attitudes towards the problem for a better outcome. Understand that you need to live with that person as he/she is, not as you want them to be, as the only person you can change is yourself.

So, next time your partner doesn’t want to go to a party crowded by people he/she couldn’t care for less, try to find what you two would like best for the night and do that thing instead, or just go alone and give him/her some time for themselves. If your son chooses to forgo college for now, try to be enthusiastic for his ambition to start working and gain experience which money can’t buy or even start a career which may fulfill his life.

  1. Some benign neglect helps kids to grow up

You can’t always be the guardian angel of your child. Even guardian angels aren’t always there for us, as they let us learn and grow. Parents who want to jump in into every stressful situation for the child and save their children from the momentary stress are putting their children to a risk of them becoming incompetent and aimless on the long run.

This is of course out of love, but not accepting the fact that nature should influence the course of the child’s development (and this means all good and bad situations) means not accepting the child to grow up and face their problems as they come. If they don’t learn to face their minor problems (being said no for some things or doing something wrong that will backfire with minor consequences), they won’t be able to face the bigger problems in life when their turn comes.

Stepping in regularly to protect kids from stress may hurt them in the long run. It may lead to depression-prone, aimless kids (and ultimately, adults) who lack the ability to achieve goals. Entitlement is another side effect that will backfire when these kids grow up.

Being entitled to everything they want in life when they were young, without putting any effort into it, makes them lack the ability to achieve what they want when they become independent, if they ever succeed to do so.

It is much better to let kids live through occasional disappointment and resolve their own problems as much as possible. Of course you should assure them that their feelings are heard and that your moral support is always there for them. Trust in their competence to overcome obstacles and help them grow and become self-sufficient.

  1. Total opposites don’t forever attract

The key to a happy, healthy relationship is choosing someone who validates your views and habits. Do not underestimate the importance of shared values, personality traits, closeness in age, and other binding factors. This, however, doesn’t mean that the partner should be your personality replica and having differences adds the needed spice for a healthy and dynamic relationship.

It is simple: being overly similar with your partner can rather lead to a bit of a brother-sister relationship which is too predictable and without a lot of novelty. On the other hand, having a partner who is the complete opposite of you in every aspect means that you won’t be able to find a common ground.

The golden mean is to have a partner whose passions differ from yours so you can expand your experience, personality and understanding, but at the same time be sure you are aligned on big-picture issues: ways of showing affection, views on morality and raising children.

  1. Social interaction matters a lot

The secret to living longer is not only what you eat and how much you exercise. Friendships are just as important. In fact, studies have shown that the more active your social life is, the less likely it is for you to die of any cause – up to a 50% less! A low level of social interaction has the same negative effect as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

Having friends who have your back helps you face stressful situations more easily – their support and encouragement is more than enough for you to face the day and its perils. Even a good job done is not something to be happy about, if there is no one you can celebrate your success with, even with a smile.

  1. Lust wanes, love remains

It is not true that a relationship’s end can be seen with the end of the romantic excitement and the beginning of the arguments. The immature part of us believes that compatible people don’t have conflicts. On the contrary, a healthy relationship consists of arguments too, but it’s the way couples argue that matters. A healthy couple will argue to let their misunderstandings out so they can be sorted out.

Both partners take responsibility for their missteps and through the quarrel do they start appreciating their common effort to overcome the problem before it piles up and becomes a heavy burden.

And yes, it is normal for desire to wane. Deep love comes after desire wanes, as we start seeing how imperfect the other is and choose to commit to them anyway.

The best way to restore connection is initiating something new in your sex life and sometimes it’s as simple as tidying your workplace as the piled up mess has been annoying her for months. Simple as it is: people know what warms their partner’s heart.

Farmer’s Almanac Says Winter 2016 Will Be Extra Brutal!

By
Elizabeth Williams

How did you feel last winter? Do you still remember the biting cold that made your face freeze within minutes, the frosty wind that assailed you from every side, the avalanches of snow that turned your front porches into fridges? ​Well, gear up, because this winter is going to be even worse than that!

What kind of season do we have in store this year?

Another actively cold & snow storm full season is expected this year for the US (not for every area though).

We shall look into exactly what will happen using many long range techniques.
– Are we STILL going to have a ‘Super El Nino’?

– Well, here’s your answer: it’s likely to match that of 1997/8!

That winter was a mild one with average snowfall. However, THIS year we have a different polar set up, with the Magnetic Polar Shift currently happening, combining with the strong jet stream. This could lead to high amounts of Northern Blocking pushing heavy snow south into Indiana, Arkansas, Michigan, Ohio, etc.

And the rest of the US, but not all areas, especially the East but also some Central & Mid Atlantic Areas, including the mountains of the West, should have a slightly milder than average season.
Long Range Forecasts (especially those for winter and autumn) are very uncertain as the atmosphere is fluid.

Those who are familiar with long range predictions will realize this complication, so please do not take this forecast too seriously… Check for updates again in the month of September.

Get ready for a double portion of snow and freezing-cold temperatures this winter
Here is a summary for the coming season for the US Areas:

The upcoming winter season is likely to be full of surprises. However, a generally snowy & cold winter can be expected in the East (not quite Brutal), further West, near Average to “at times cool”, and “at times warm”. California Dry – and probably wet for Texas, Atlanta, Florida, etc. Cold for Missouri, Colorado, Delaware, Kentucky and New York.

The first US snow spot (snow cover) has started to develop across Siberia. Snow cover across the Siberian plain & Northern Hemisphere is a significant factor when forecasting how much Northern Blocking is likely to form.

What is the so-called Northern Blocking?

Northern Blocking is the most significant weather mechanism that allows cold air to drain off the pole and deliver cold & snowy conditions in mid latitudes and during any year to. The first white stuff spot, or appearance of the white stuff as weather geeks call it, usually appears in September.

What is El Nino?

El Nino is a spell of warm waters in the Pacific and usually pushes warm air into California, with colder temperatures & high snow across the East towards New York & even as far South as Florida. These are the main factors influencing weather here.

El Nino will be “Super” or very strong later in 2015, promoting the “North Easter” event, which means low pressure bringing cold & snowy conditions in the North East of the US.

What does the Old Farmer Almanac predict for the upcoming winter?

It also predicts that it will be especially cold and those places that don’t usually experience much snowfall, such as the Pacific Northwest, will be hit with ‘buckets’ of it.

Now, before you curl up into a ball and cry, let’s look at the bright side. Firstly, there are plenty of scientists who poo-poo the almanac, which is based on a secret formula that founder Robert B. Thomas designed using solar cycles, climatology, and meteorology​, so it just might be wrong.

But even if it is right, there are certain perks to a real, sturdy winter.

“Just about everybody who gets snow will have a White Christmas in one capacity or another,” Almanac editor- Janice Stillman ​shared her thoughts with The Huffington Post.

Of course, this means that there will be ever more reason to stay curled up inside with your loved ones, cradling a cup of your favorite tea, and watching the windows frost over as the sky carpets the earth in a thick blanket of clean white.

Why And How Couples Should Make New Friends Together

By
Elizabeth Williams

As we get older, it gets much harder for us to make new friends and it’s even harder to make new friends as a couple. People you’ve known all your life start to move away, some get married, others have babies and you sooner than later you find yourself without any friends.

One can easily grow apart from people they’ve known for years. Making new friends can be quite a feat; making new couple friends is the biggest challenge of all but it’s worth it.

Research has shown that making new friends as a couple can boost your relationship and bring you two closer.

According to a new study published in the Personal Relationships journal, couples felt closer to each other when they made new friends together.

Led by Keith Welker PhD, the study used about 150 couples split into two groups.

People in the first group had to answer increasingly probing questions about themselves like, “If you could go back in your life and change any one experience, what would it be and why?”

The couples in the second group answered small talk questions and some of the participants were paired with other couples; others completed the task with their partner.

The research showed that partners who revealed personal details in front of another couple reported feeling closer to each other afterward than any other group.

The conclusion:it is possible that making new friends, rather than acquaintances, helps you see your partner in a different way and it can save your relationship if you find yourselves in a rough patch.

“The creation of couple friendships may be an additional way to reignite feelings of passionate love in romantic relationships,” the authors wrote in the abstract.

So if your relationship could use a boost, you might want to hang out with another couple once in a while.

How? –you might ask.Well, starting with the basics is always a good idea. Think of an activity you would both enjoy and have fun. No matter where you choose to go, you will meet like-minded people, or even couples there.

Go wine tasting, for example, if that’s what you like doing. You are sure to meet some interesting and cool couples there.

You can also take a vacation.  Cruises and adults-only, all-inclusive spots offer the best options for meeting like-minded couples. If you happen to meet people from another state or from a country on the other side of the world, well, you’ll have a new place to visit on your next trip and you’ll have a place to stay while you’re there.

The office is another great place to meet new people. If you overhear a co-worker arguing on the phone with their partner, strike up a conversation and invite them on a double date. Working at the same place will help you find some common-ground to begin conversation, but don’t spend the whole date talking about work because your partners will be bored to death.

Single people meet new potential dates online, so you two can also try to find an interesting couple to hang out with on the internet. Sites like kupple.com and hangbase.com let you browse couples by location and interest. Why not give it a try?

Volunteer with your partner. If you love animals, spend some time together at the local shelter. Not only will the activity by itself bring you two more closer together, but you will also have a chance to meet other couples there. If no couples are around, you can always make a new single friend.

If you start to feel that your relationship is stagnating, you should consider making friends with another couple. It’s worth the effort and it just might save your relationship.  

Can You Be Friends With Your Ex? Yes Or No!

By
Elizabeth Williams

You met, you connected, you fell in love, you moved in together, maybe you even got married and then it all fell apart. When a relationship goes to hell, can you stay friends with your ex?

We’ve all heard that phrase “We can still be friends,” but can you really? If it’s your ex-husband in question and there are children involved, it’s crucial to remain at least civil. If there aren’t children involved, keeping the friendship alive will take a lot of hard work and a lot of maturity. Are you up for such a challenge is he or she worth the trouble?

In reality, there is no harm in staying friends with someone you’ve invested so much into already. Some find it easy, but others might find it impossible to stay friends with their exes. One is always the heartbreaker, while the other is the bitter one. It will take a lot to overcome the pain before the jilted one decides to give the friendship a chance.

So how do the people who really “stay friends” after a break-up make it work? 

Numerous studies have shown that the more satisfied couples were during a relationship, the more likely they were to remain friends. If the anger and hurt can be overcome, there’s great comfort in keeping an ex in your life. Did you have such a relationship? Is he or she worth the effort?

In actuality, staying friends with our exes means honoring the time we spent getting to know a person we still respect and feel close to. 

A truly healthy friendship with an ex-partner is a great sign that you’ve emotionally evolved past the breakup. It means the relationship itself was a supremely mature one, built on mutual respect and closeness. Such relationships are truly worth repeating in the future.

Before even thinking about going back to the friend zone, you should wait at least a month before you even consider meeting up with your ex, especially if you were the one who ended the relationship.

If it was an amicable separation it’s easier to stay friends. However, if it was an ugly break-up that has involved an affair or a betrayal, it is going to be hard to develop or re-establish the friendship. 

If you have children together, you should definitely work on the relationship. If you work together or you go to the same club, you should also try to stay friends with your ex. Remaining friends will eliminate tension and awkwardness in your shared environment.

Make sure you are in the clear with your emotions before you consider reviving the friendship with your ex. If you think that being friends will increase your chances of getting back together, you shouldn’t stay friends with your ex, since you don’t see him or her as a friend. This is dangerous territory. The relationship ended for a reason, going back is not a smart idea.

If you still have feelings for your ex, the best thing to do is stay away and get over the break up in a healthy manner. There is no point in maintaining a relationship based on confusion and denial.

Once you decide to give it your best, make sure you don’t have the same expectations you had while you two were together. It will not be the same. Jealousy will lurk around every corner, and who wants that? Ask yourself; are you ready to see your ex in a relationship with someone else? Are you ok with being part of his or her life with someone else? Can you handle that? If not, stay away. You still have some emotions to deal with.

The most important thing of all is for you to know why you are even considering staying friends with your ex. If you want to keep that person in your life because you respect them and enjoy spending time with them, you should find the strength to get over the break up and simply go on with your life.

Don’t hold on to hope or false belief that maybe you’ll end up back together. You don’t know what will happen in the future and you might be wasting your time. If you value the person and don’t want to lose them, be prepared for a rough ride. That is the painful truth. Once your ex starts a new relationship, you can be sure it will trigger some old painful emotions. The smartest thing you can do is keep contact to a minimum, be respectful to their new partner and maybe you can all be friends in the future.

We are talking about the person that has seen you naked, the person with whom you’ve shared the most intimate part of yourself. It’s going to be painful, it’s going to be awkward, but if they are worth keeping in your life, you have to grow up and move on.

Amazing Tips For Making Friends As An Adult

By
Elizabeth Williams

As we transition into adulthood, we often find our circle of friends begins to shrink and we are not surprised. As time goes by, we grow older, people start to get married, have kids; some move, others change and so on.

Life often comes in our way and a whole new myriad of obligations restrain us, preventing us from spending quality time with our friends and not all of have the patience or the will to stick it out.

With the rise of social media and the development of technology, human interaction has gone to hell. Some of us don’t even know how to strike up a conversation anymore.

Lifelong bonds with friends are marvelous, but not always possible. Between juggling work and home, we often find ourselves having less and less time for our friends so our adult friendships take the back seat.

So how does one make new friends and maintain strong relationships with the old ones as an adult?

The one thing you have to remember is: it’s all up to you! You shouldn’t be surprised if some of your old friends have started to ditch your calls after a while. You have to nourish the relationship in order to keep it alive and well.

If you can’t find the time to go out with your friends, just ring them up and have a nice chat. Don’t forget to call your friends on a regular basis just to let them know that you’re thinking about them and that they too count in your life. They have to know that you haven’t forgotten about them. Also, surely you can find the time to go out for a quick drink on a Friday night? Take the initiative, invite a friend to dinner or simply drop by for a visit. It’s easy, but this goes for the old friends and keeping old friends is much easier than making new friends.

When it comes to making new friends, it’s a bit different. Adding friends on Facebook is easy and it doesn’t count. When was the last time you met a new friend in real life?

If you feel that your social skills are a bit rusty, you need to brush up on those and begin reconnecting with your old friends and start making new ones.

We do live in the age of social media and technology, so let’s start there. Try to connect with your contacts on Twitter and Facebook. You do share the same interests, so why not try to take the relationship further.

Ask an acquaintance to a show or a concert. You are sure to have a good time and it will give you the opportunity to get to know each other better.

Another great place to make new friends is work. Try to connect with some of your coworkers. Your new best friend might be just around the corner.

Go out for a drink all by yourself. You just might run into someone who shares the same interests. It’s worth the risk and you might end up having a blast!

Stop being defensive and start opening up. As we grow up, we tend to put up a wall of fear around us and letting new people in through that door can be quite a feat. We are too scared of being hurt. Risk it: give someone a chance.

Join a book club or find some other activity that has other regular participants. Go to the gym; join a hiking club, a parent-teacher association and so on. You are sure to meet other like-minded people there.

Don’t forget your family members. My sister is my best and oldest friend. My mother is also a very close and dear friend. You must have someone in your family that you are close to, a cousin or an aunt perhaps. Family members make great friends.

The most important thing of all: be true to yourself and others. Adults don’t have time to waste on pettiness and games. We all strive to find honesty and truthfulness. We need someone that understands us; someone that will be our rock on a stormy day.

Having passions in life is great, but people are the ones that enrich our existence.

5 Signs How To Know That You’ve Found “Mr. Right”

By
Elizabeth Williams

I loved romantic comedies when I was a teenager and I developed a certain theory about love and Mr. Right. However, I grew up and learned – the hard way, of course – that life is far from a romantic comedy. Don’t get me wrong, I did find Mr. Right, but the road that led me to him was rather tedious. Love is complicated. We, humans, are complicated as well; but there is nothing simpler and more beautiful than true love. The trick is finding it and recognizing it when it looks you straight in the eye.  

We’ve all asked ourselves at point or another: “Am I in the right relationship?” “Is he the one?” “Where is this relationship going?”

Such questions can be troubling and can even put the “wrong strain” on the right relationship, so you better be careful.

If you want to make sure that you are in the right relationship with the right person, you might want to take a look at these tips that are set to help you determine whether the one you’re dating is “THE ONE”.

Tip 1: First and foremost: Set your intentions

This is your first and most essential tip. What does this mean? Well, it’s the basics of dating and the one thing you have to settle before going any further with the dating game. Setting your intentions means that you and no one else has to know what you want from the relationship you’re currently in. In other words, you have to ask yourself two very important questions:

  1. Am I looking for a husband?
  2. Am I looking for a good time and nothing serious?

Once you have an answer for these questions, discuss the issue with your partner. If he doesn’t agree, you shouldn’t pursue a future together. It’s just not meant to be. It’s always good to put your cards on the table as soon as possible, so that no one wastes any time. You should expect the same from your partner.

Tip 2: Establish mutual feelings

Have you ever found yourself giving a lot more in a relationship than the other person? Has it ever ended well? – Of course not. The core of a healthy relationship lies in the mutual feelings and understanding of both partners, meaning you should not waste your time with someone that doesn’t give as much and as good as he is getting. Such “one-sided” relationships never work. If you feel used, underappreciated or simply unfulfilled, the relationship must end. Respect yourself.

Tip 3: Allow your “flame” to spread into the “friend” zone

Never rely simply on the physical aspect of a relationship. If you have nothing to talk about, no common interests, how will you experience life together? How will you deal with the daily squabbles? How will you compromise? How will you support each other? If you haven’t managed to forge a solid, healthy relationship that stretches beyond the physical love and attraction, you should call it quits. Sometimes, two people just “click” at the very beginning and things quickly become clear. If you haven’t “clicked” outside of the bedroom, it’s time to part ways. That is, if you’re looking for a serious relationship. If you’re in it just for fun, keep at it.

Tip 4:  Family and friends still count, listen to what they have to say about your relationship

When our friends or members of our family try to get involved, we usually shut them out, but we shouldn’t. They are the ones that know us best and their opinion should always count. They might provide you with a different “viewpoint” about the person you’re with. Maybe you don’t see something they do see. If you’re battling with indecisiveness, turn to your close ones. They’ll guide you, for sure. If you’re settling for something, they’ll tell you. If you’re happy, but blind, they’ll open your eyes. If they approve of the person you’re with, you should start looking at him through their eyes… you might see something you missed before and give the relationship another chance.

Tip 5: Make sure you get “what you paid for”

If you dedicate yourself, if you dedicate your time, if dedicate your feelings, if you dedicate your all to one person, it better pay off. The person you’ve chosen to be with MUST love you, respect you, spend time with you, make you laugh, make you feel safe, make you feel complete. The two of you should feel as one. If these conditions are not met, it’s not worth it. Don’t even think about marriage. When it’s the right person at the right time, you’ll know. For if there’s even a glint of doubt about the person you’re with, you should take a moment to analyze why that “glint of doubt” lingers on. After all, it doesn’t take much for a glint to grow into a raving blaze.

5 Signs You Are With The Wrong Person

By
Elizabeth Williams

Finding “the one” might be mission impossible or as easy as a walk in the park. One can easily get carried away in a relationship and before realizing it, you’ll find yourself in a long term commitment, or even marriage, that absolutely has no ground or future.

So before you let yourself be seduced by a handsome, strapping, gorgeous looking man with whom you have nothing in common, try to snap out of it and continue your search, for once you find Mr. Right, it will all be worth it.

Let’s start at the very beginning. The most important thing you have to check in your relationship is the commitment. How committed are you both? Do you spend time together? Do you have common goals? Do you work for a shared future? Is there a WE and US in everything you do?

You have to keep your eyes open for the signs that will tell you whether you two are meant to be together.

So how does one know? Here’s what you should be looking out for according to Hayley Hobson.

  1. Can you imagine your life without them?

Does he fit in every plan you make? Can you imagine waking up without him? Does his opinion count? Are you factoring that person into your long-term goals? If the answer is no, that’s a very bad sign. You two are just not meant to be. Don’t waste time, end the relationship.

  1. Are you emotionally invested in your partner?

A real relationship is never based purely on sex. The physical attraction does matter, but a real relationship is about commitment, it’s about experiencing life together, working towards a common goal. A real relationship is about overcoming the daily difficulties, the disagreements. A real relationship is about making compromises and forgiveness. A real relationship is about learning new things about each other and loving the differences. If you can love your partner even when you hate him, it’s a good sign that you two just might make it. If you only rely on the physical attraction and your connection doesn’t expand beyond that, you should consider ending the relationship.

  1. Do you both take part in fun activities? How much time do you spend together?

If you start making plans on your own, excluding your partner, then you might be trying to pull away from him and create some distance and distance is never good. If you never include him in activities that are fun for you, then you probably don’t want to spend time with him. Going to the movies, going on a hike, grabbing a cup of coffee with your friends, going for a walk in the park… do you even want him there? If the answer is no, take the hint and send him packing.

  1. Do you have the same values?

Do you have a lot in common? If you do, then you’re in a healthy, sound relationship. If you don’t, then it’s just a matter of time before you realize that you two don’t have a future together. You might be attracted to him, you might even be in love, but if you have nothing in common, the time will come when you start fighting over the most trivial of things, like which toothpaste we should buy, or what should we have for dinner? Once you start going down that road, there’s no turning back, so you might as well take a U-turn now and end it before it even begins.

  1. How often do you have sex? Do you have sex?

Sex is the most intimate form of communicating our love for each other. Sex counts. We’ve all had our dry spells, never mind the reasons. However, once a dry spell turns into a never-ending full-fledged draught, you have a real problem on your hands. If you can’t overcome such crisis in a relationship, hard decisions must be made; but before you end the relationship, do give your best and try to save it, so there’s no room for regrets later. Once you start digging deeper,it will soon become apparent whether or not there is something worth saving. If nothing can be done, you should move on with your head held high. After all, life is too short to be wasted.

Also, does he inspire you to be better, does he “get you”? Does he accept you for who you are and loves you no matter what? Try to answer these questions and it will all become clear. Love is not about spending time with someone just because he happened to be there or because you don’t want to be alone or just because you’re tired of the search. Love is the most wonderful thing one can experience in life and it’s worth the wait.

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