Successful couples approach their marriage intelligently. They understand that marriage requires constant work and improvement.
They go to seminars, read books, talk with each other on a daily basis, and most importantly they learn from their mistakes.
Below are 8 secrets that all successful people do in their marriages.
1. IF YOU ALWAYS DO THE SAME THING, YOU WILL GET THE SAME RESULT
Wise people know that in order to solve a problem they must change their approach to it. If their previous ways didn’t get them the needed results, they would find new ways to solve it. Plus, they understand that if they want to change something in the marriage – they must change themselves first, their attitudes, beliefs, and actions.
2. HAPPINESS IS NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING
Everyone wants to be happy in their marriage. However, the thing that separates successful from unsuccessful marriage is that in a successful marriage, spouses understand that they can’t be happy all the time. However, they find ways to internalize feelings of happiness and remind themselves constantly of the happy times they had when they are feeling down.
3. CHANGE YOUR MIND – CHANGE YOUR MARRIAGE
A wise person knows that it is almost impossible to change their partner. They can only change themselves. They know that how they see themselves affects how their spouse sees and feels about them. Positive attitude and optimism can go a long way.
4. DISCOVER THE VALUE IN JUST SHOWING UP
Often, the best thing you can do for your marriage when things are not going well is to just be present. You don’t have to come up with solutions, but just showing up when your spouse needs you the most can save your marriage. They say time heals everything. Maybe you only need a little time for things to fall into place again.
5. THE GRASS IS GREENEST WHERE YOU WATER IT
Happy couples don’t believe in the grass is the greener myth. Instead of thinking that someone else can make them happy, they focus on their marriage and put real effort to make it work. They are team-players and know that together they can overcome any obstacles. Because let’s face it – no marriage is perfect.
6. MARRIAGE IS OFTEN ABOUT FIGHTING THE BATTLE BETWEEN YOUR EARS
In a happy marriage, there is no place for holding grudges and reminiscing of past mistakes. They understand that their spouse is not perfect nor are they. They don’t focus on the past, and what could have been, their focus is only on the future and how they can improve their marriage.
7. A CRISIS DOESN’T MEAN THAT THE MARRIAGE IS OVER
Even though crises can look like storms – scary, loud, and even disastrous; but the thing is you have to wait for the storm to pass and do not give up. Overcoming a crisis can actually make your marriage stronger and bring you closer together.
8. LOVE IS A VERB, NOT JUST A FEELING
Wise people understand that the romance may fade over time. They don’t expect to have the same intense feelings as they did at the beginning of the relationship. They understand that they need to constant work in order to keep the spark and romance between alive. They take seriously their vow “for better or for worse.”