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Anxiety Symptoms In Children – 10 Things Children Say That Could Mean They Have Anxiety

By
Riley Cooper
children anxiety

As all the children line up to get on the bus to go to school, your kid turns to you and says, “Please, don’t make me go to school, my stomach hurts.” You think to yourself right away, “Oh, no! Not again.” What should be a normal morning routine turns into a tough challenge.

Terror is the first thing you notice on your kid’s faces when you look at them. You want to ease their worry and comfort them. You want to assure them that they have nothing to worry about. But no matter what you say to them, their reaction is, “I don’t want to go to school. Please, don’t make me go. Please!” (1)

And then, only after you “threaten” to forbid them to use their tablet for one week do they grudgingly climb onto the bus. And you feel awful.

Well, if any of this sounds familiar to you, know that you aren’t the only parent who watches their kid struggling with anxiety. Anxiety in kids can make both the child having anxiety and their parents feel helpless. This condition can come from anywhere and for no logical reason. Fortunately, anxiety symptoms in kids are easy to notice!

When it comes to children struggling with anxiety, you need to know that it can be hard for them to express what exactly is happening to them. You’ll know that something is not right, but it might not be evident that this awful condition is the reason behind it. (2)

Here are 10 things children say that could mean they have anxiety. Certainly, just because they might say any of the following things, it doesn’t necessarily mean they have anxiety. But what is important is that you are always open to the possibility.

1. “My belly hurts.”

If your child tends to say this before something which is likely to arouse anxiety and other signs of anxiety are present, such as a racing heart, tense muscles, flushed cheeks, panic attacks, nausea, etc., know that anxiety might be behind it.

2. “I don’t feel well. I feel like I’m going to vomit.”

Nausea is a normal and very common part of anxiety. But, it can feel terrible. So, if this is something your child tends to tell you before going to school or doing something stressful, and there doesn’t appear to be any other symptom of illness, know that their nausea might be coming from their anxiety.

3. “I am not hungry.”

During anxiety, the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for the formation and storage of memories associated with emotional events, sends your body a message to slow down so as to save energy when it thinks that there is some kind of danger. So, when the digestive system shuts down to save energy, the need to eat shuts down, too. But, of course, this is just temporary.

4. “I’m sad, and I don’t know why.”       

The amygdala controls strong emotions, too. When your child’s anxiety reaches its peak, sadness can switch to high volume, too. And this is not necessarily an indication that something sad has occurred. It may only mean that their brain is on high alert.

5. “But, what if …?”

If this is what you often hear your kid say, know that the what-ifs are just your child’s anxious brain’s attempt to stay safe and protected by eliminating as many unknown situations and risks as possible.

You can help inhibit their worries by asking them to tell you what they think will happen. This question will cause the pre-frontal cortex (a part of the brain which is more rational) to activate.

6. “I don’t want to go to school.”

Since anxiety comes from a region of the brain which runs on instinct, it does not always appear rational. This means that if the brain thinks there’s some kind of danger, it doesn’t want you to spend a lot of time considering your options – it only wants to get you safe.

That’s why your child may refuse to go to school even when there appear to be no other problems with their school, teachers, or friends.

7. “I can’t sleep.”

Although an anxious brain can keep itself busy 24/7, its favorite time to play is at night – the time when there isn’t anything to distract you from anxiety.

8. “My arms/legs hurt.”

When struggling with anxious thoughts, children might not realize that they are tensing. This can make their legs and arms feel stiff, weak, or achy. You can help relieve their tension by guiding them through muscle relaxation exercises.

9. “I am exhausted.”

An anxious brain can keep children awake at night with constant racing and intrusive thoughts. Dealing with such thoughts when their entire body is telling them to rest is really exhausting and draining. Practicing mindfulness can help them relieve their tiredness.  

10. “I want you to stay with me.”

Of course, there is nothing wrong with your child wanting to stay close to you, but if this always happens before you go to work or wherever, it can turn into a huge problem.

Separation anxiety is caused by a fear that something bad might happen to you while you’re not around them. Fortunately, this fear doesn’t last long. It’s temporary, and as soon as your child realizes that both of you are okay when you aren’t there, their anxiety will ease.

Now, let’s see what causes anxiety in children and how you can help your child if he/she has anxiety.

What Triggers Anxiety In Kids?

Anxiety is one of the most common health conditions children struggle with. Anxious children are often quiet and behave well, which makes it hard for their parents and teachers to notice that they suffer from anxiety. Alternatively, other anxious children can misbehave and be disruptive, being labeled as being a “bad” kid.

Unfortunately, in the majority of cases, both types of children end up not receiving the help they greatly need. When anxiety is left untreated, this can result in depression, substance use, and reduced quality of life. That’s why it’s important for parents to recognize their child has a problem once they begin showing their first symptoms of anxiety and learn how to help them grow out of this health condition.

Various things can make children feel anxious at various ages. However, it’s important to know that it’s normal for children to experience many of these worries while growing up. For instance, it’s normal for young children, and even babies, to feel anxious the first time they’re away from their parents. Most children outgrow the fear of being away from a parent by age 2 to 3 once they get used to being with a babysitter, teacher, or grandparent. However, when children don’t outgrow this fear until they’re 2 or 3 years old, this is called separation anxiety.

Children with separation anxiety may cry and become clingy when their parent is not around. They may say they don’t feel well to go to school or even miss a lot of days of school. They may be afraid of sleeping alone or have a hard time falling asleep. They may also refuse to hang out and play with other children without their parents.

Then, it’s normal for preschool-age kids to feel afraid of insects, blood, needles, animals, heights, storms, fireworks, the dark, or swimming. However, the majority of times, when a child feels scared, their parent can comfort them and help them feel calm and safe again. But when a child develops a phobia about certain things, this is a different story. Children who have a phobia(s) feel more extreme and more intense fear, and they try to avoid the thing they’re afraid of. For instance, a child with a phobia of thunderstorms may refuse to go out when the weather is cloudy or rainy.

Another type of phobia children can have the social phobia, also known as a social anxiety disorder. 

The most common symptoms of a social anxiety disorder include:

  • Constant worry about humiliating or embarrassing yourself
  • Avoidance interacting or hanging out with people out of fear of embarrassment
  • The constant fear of situations where others may judge you negatively
  • Avoidance making eye contact 
  • Having low self-esteem
  • Intense fear of starting conversations 
  • Intense fear of talking with strangers
  • Intense fear during social situations
  • The expectation of the worst possible scenario during a social situation
  • A constant fear that other people will notice you’re suffering from anxiety
  • Fear of symptoms such as trembling, sweating, or blushing that may make you feel embarrassed
  • Fear of situations in which you might be the center of attention
  • Analysis of your flaws and performance in your conversations after talking to someone

Other things can make children become anxious, such as the death of a parent, sibling, or friend, serious health conditions, trauma, violence, or abuse. Kids can also feel anxious before tests and exams, after moving house, or when going to a new school.

Another type of anxiety children can suffer from is generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). Children with this type of anxiety disorder usually worry about homework, playtime with friends, tests, or making mistakes. They might also worry about riding the school bus, attending birthday parties, loved ones, weather, illness, or the future. Of course, all children can worry about these things, but children with GAD worry about them way more than kids who don’t suffer from this disorder.

Children with GAD have trouble focusing in school since there’s almost always something they worry about. They also have a hard time eating well, having fun, relaxing, or falling asleep.

And last but not least, many children have panic disorder. It’s common for these children to experience sudden anxiety attacks that can lead to intense physical symptoms, like shortness of breath, sweating, trembling, or feeling jittery. Teens experience panic attacks more commonly than young children, and these attacks can occur at any time.

In what follows, we’ve presented the most common symptoms of panic disorder.

  • Difficulty breathing
  • Smothering sensation
  • Racing heart
  • Trembling
  • Chest pain
  • Numb hands
  • Sweating
  • Dizziness
  • Weakness
  • Chills
  • Nausea

What Are The Most Common Symptoms Of Anxiety In Children?

Children suffering from anxiety usually show the following symptoms:

  • Constantly having negative thoughts or worrying
  • Not eating properly
  • Being clingy
  • Often crying
  • Having trouble falling and/or staying asleep
  • Having a hard time concentrating
  • Avoidance of specific people, situations, or activities
  • Getting irritable or angry fast
  • Often feeling tense
  • Often feeling nausea or complaining of stomach aches or headaches, which don’t stem from other health issues

Is It Normal For An 11-Year-Old To Have Anxiety?

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), around 9 percent of kids aged 3-17 suffer from anxiety disorders.

However, every parent needs to know that some degree of anxiety in young children is normal rather than alarming. For instance, it’s normal for an 11-year-old to worry that they might embarrass or humiliate themselves in front of their friends or in school. It’s normal for them to feel anxious or afraid when encountering a new situation because they need time to get used to it and learn about it. It’s also normal for an 11-year-old to fear kidnappers, burglars, or war.

Now, many of these fears come and go throughout their life. Even if a child doesn’t outgrow their anxiety or fears, their parents have nothing to worry about as long as their anxiety doesn’t interfere with their everyday functioning. However, if the parent can notice the things presented below, they have a solid reason to feel concerned about their child’s mental health and seek professional help:

  • Their child constantly avoids certain people, situations, or activities
  • Their child frequently has panic attacks or complains of headaches or stomach aches
  • Their child’s anxiety is causing them extreme distress and decreasing the quality of their life 

How Can You Help Your Child With Anxiety?

If your child has anxiety, you should first talk to them about their worries and fears. Comfort them, reassure them, and let them know you understand how they feel.

You can also try to explain to your child in simple terms what anxiety is and how it affects our bodies if they’re old enough.

Nevertheless, the most important thing you should do as a parent is to help your child develop healthy coping strategies that will enable them to get a grip on their anxious thoughts and feelings whenever these appear and keep them from overwhelming them. You can do that in the following ways:

  • Make sure your child becomes able to recognize symptoms of anxiety in themselves.
  • Teach your child to practice simple breathing and relaxation techniques, such as breathing in and out for a count of 5.
  • Encourage your child to ask for your help whenever they need it to control their anxiety.
  • Distraction can greatly benefit young children. For instance, if your child is anxious about going to school, play games on the way there, like who can notice the most people wearing glasses.
  • If a big change is coming up, like a house move, let your child know what’s going to happen and why. In this way, you’ll help them prepare for the upcoming new situation.
  • If distressing events make your child feel anxious, such as separation, loss, or bereavement, let them watch movies or read books that will help them better understand their feelings.
  • Encourage your child to write their worries on pieces of paper and put them into a “worry” box. Then you can go through the pieces of paper together and discuss the worries written on them at the end of the day or week.
  • Individual counseling and/or family counseling have also been proven effective in reducing childhood anxiety.

If you can notice that your child’s anxiety persists, is getting worse, or affects their school, relationships, and everyday life, it’s best to get professional help.

Can A Child Grow Out Of Anxiety?

Luckily, a child diagnosed with anxiety can outgrow this disorder if they live in a supportive environment and receive appropriate treatment. Therapies that involve taking anxiolytic medications and cognitive-behavioral therapy or a combination of these therapies have been proven to help reduce symptoms of anxiety in children.

Your Guide to Maintaining a Million Dollar Smile

By
Elizabeth Williams

Do you take your smile for granted? A warm beam isn’t just about looking aesthetically pleasing or appearing happy in photos. No, a smile is also an important form of communication and can help you to instantly establish rapport with a complete stranger.

Of course, if you aren’t fully confident of your grin, you will probably not be flashing it all that often. And, there are quite a number of factors that can affect your smile. These include poor eating habits, bad oral health routines, physical trauma, and more.

The good news is that all of your oral issues can easily be overcome, as long as you know how to. Below, you can find all the ways you can maintain a wonderful smile, regardless of how old you are!

Get the Right Toothbrush

As you are aware, there are two main types of toothbrushes to choose from – manual and electric. So, which one offers the best result? Well, for the most part, it does appear that electric toothbrushes do provide a number of benefits.

This is because these brushes allow for more movement over the surface area of your teeth. As a result, it is easier to get rid of plaque and prevent long-term build-up. Such toothbrushes are also great if you have mobility issues or don’t stick to the recommended two-minute brushing limit.

Now, if you do decide to get an electric toothbrush, make sure to select one that has an oscillating movement instead of one that vibrates. This has been shown to get rid of more plaque.

If you want to stick with your manual toothbrush, there is nothing wrong with this either. You just need to make an effort to point the brush at a 45-degree angle and move it in a circular motion rather than back or forth. Also, make it a point to brush each surface area of every tooth.

Be Aware of Staining Foods

Are your teeth stained? If so, this is probably due to the fact that you consume dark or staining food on a regular basis. Some of the culprits include coffee, red wine, black tea, cola, and even gravy! So, try to cut down on these foods as much as possible.

Since it can be quite difficult to stop consuming these foods and drinks altogether, eat or drink them only at specific times. In particular, wait until you have your toothbrush handy to consume these darker dishes or drinks. Then, you can rinse out your mouth and brush your teeth before the stain has a chance to set in.

Whiten Stained Teeth

If you have favored staining foods in the past, you may find that some stains just won’t go away. In this instance, you will need to consider a tooth whitening treatment. If this is a route that you are willing to take, there are two options – at home or professional teeth whitening.

There is no denying that home whitening kits have improved by leaps and bounds over the last few years. What’s more, these kits are cost-effective and readily available. This means that you will be able to get brighter teeth in just a couple of days or so.

Nonetheless, there are some limits to what these kits can do. If you have badly stained teeth or want to whiten your teeth quite a bit, then you will need to visit a dentist. They have the necessary tools and equipment to give the desired effect. Of course, this can end up costing you a pretty penny.

Choose the Right Lipstick

If you wear lipstick, it is worth it getting the right shade for yourself. Typically, shades of pink and red are your best bet. Some of the top colors include wine, cherry red, plum, berry, or rose pink. Or, select a lipstick that has blue-based or pink-based undertones.

These hues are great at hiding any yellow or dark stains on your teeth. Thus, they will help your teeth to look whiter without needing to undergo extensive treatment. Just make sure that the shade you select suits your skin tone as well. 

Fix Fundamental Flaws

Few people are born with perfect teeth. Most have to put up with crooked, pointed, or damaged teeth for much of their lives. If this is impacting your self-confidence, however, and preventing you from smiling, then you need to consider a change.

The good news is that this is now easier than ever to manage. With the help of veneers, you can fix both major and minor flaws to enjoy a whole new smile. While this may sound like a costly affair, it isn’t anymore. This is because you now have the option of veneers Turkey, ensuring that you can pay a lot less for high-quality dentistry.

What’s especially great about this solution is that it is long-lasting. Therefore, you can enjoy the results of the procedures for half a decade or more! That news is certainly going to want to make you smile.

Visit Your Dentist Bi-Annually At Least

Although a visit to your dentist may not feel all that pleasant, it is something you should get into the habit of doing. Make it a point to visit your dentist at least twice a year, unless he or she has suggested otherwise.

So, how do dentists help maintain your smile? Well, they can prevent a wide variety of oral issues. This includes plaque buildup, tooth decay, gum disease, and more. Keep these at bay and you can keep your gums pink and teeth white and whole.

Of course, the benefit of visiting your dentist goes far beyond just the aesthetic appeal of your smile. Staying up-to-date on your appointments can keep you healthy and happy as well.

As you can see, there are a number of strategies you can use to maintain your million dollar smile. For the best results, follow all of these suggestions. Combined, they pack a powerful punch and ensure that your smile will dazzle everyone you meet.

How to Soothe Your Anxiety While Traveling

By
Elizabeth Williams

Traveling is mostly associated with fun, relax, and thrill. But for people with anxiety or panic disorders, being in a new place can be triggering. There are some steps you can take to ease your symptoms. Read on for some of the most recommendable and easy-to-execute tips.

  1. Bring your favorite films and shows with you.

If you’re not traveling with a laptop, you can get the Amazon Fire Stick. Simply plug it in any TV and you can access all the films and shows you love. The portable $39 gadget gives you access to Netflix, Amazon Instant Video, and a host of other streaming services that will help distract you from your anxiety. Keep in mind that some content might be blocked in your destination. To make sure you can access everything you need, use a VPN for Amazon Fire Stick.

  1. Drink responsibly or avoid alcohol altogether

There is an endless list of non-anxiety reasons why taking alcohol before a flight is a no-no. For starters, magine how difficult it would be getting the ever-busy hostesses to attend to you or finding your missing luggage at the destination. If you have anxiety, you would be brewing a mental disaster for yourself during or after your flight. Studies show that alcohol is more likely than not to worsen your symptoms. If you have to take anything, let it be water, coffee, or soda instead. Save the alcohol for when you arrive and are familiar with your destination.

  1. Remember the facts

If you have flight anxiety, remind yourself of how minute the chance of an air disaster happening is. In case you didn’t know, the probability of being involved in a plane crash anywhere in the world is around one in three million. If you travel once every day, you will need over 2,700 years to accumulate one million flights, which is obviously impossible. It is certainly a good idea to avoid disaster news if you have flight anxiety, but reading up basic crash stats and facts beforehand can go a long way toward calming you down ahead of your flight.

  1. Exercise before travelling

Exercising a few moments before boarding a plane can relax your muscles and brain and distract you from your anxiety. And, by exercising, we don’t necessarily mean doing a full-fledged Crossfit workout; you just need to give your body a proper stretch and you are good to go. Sitting idly before the flight may lead to a wild build-up of your nervous energy, which would start showing when it’s finally time for the flight. Use every minute you get before and in between flights to keep your muscles engaged, ideally by taking short walks.

  1. Do not fight your feelings

This may seem bizarre, but, apparently, going with your feelings is a thing when it comes to fighting anxiety. According to studies, the tactic of digging in emotionally and trying to override the panic from the core does not always work. That war with yourself is likely to cause you to pay more attention to the detrimental facet of your fears and inflate your anxiety several times over. Recognizing and acknowledging your anxiety or panic can help you get around it without breaking a sweat. Remind yourself of the times you have had the feeling and managed to pull through perfectly. This tactic helps with bringing your thoughts and feelings back under your control. It may take longer to work for abrupt panic attacks but it is almost always bound to work in the end.

  1. Watch a funny video

No alleged anxiety remedy beats listening to relaxing music for minutes on end. However, watching a video of one’s favorite comedian has been shown to have similar effects on the brain. The science behind it is simple: philosophy doesn’t think it is plausible to be anxious and laugh at the same time. One has to pave way for the other. So, if you can manage to have a collection of comedy videos at the ready before your flight, you can counter your anxiety even before it strikes. The body will remain relaxed up to hours after having a genuine laugh, so you don’t necessarily have to wait for the symptoms of anxiety to take out your phone and watch that video.

Anxiety is a complex experience that doesn’t always warn before hitting. You have to be ready at all times. These tips can help you halt your fears in their tracks and regain control of your feelings in an instant. Know which ones work for you best and ensure you can access them during and after the flight. If it is music, download the playlist and save it in your phone early on. Also, regardless of the length of your journey, be sure to fully charge your phone, tablet, or laptop for good measure.

Is Second-Hand Vaping Bad For You?

By
Elizabeth Williams
vaping

It’s not uncommon to spot somebody vaping in public these days. People are vaping at the parks and while shopping in grocery stores, as well as in some workplaces. Vaping is a relatively new phenomenon. It’s just about a decade ago that electronic cigarettes appeared in Europe and U.S markets. What’s more, no study has comprehensively revealed the long-term effects of vaping.

Therefore, though some people argue that vaping is less harmful when compared to traditional smoking, they are not justified to expose non-vapers to second-hand vapor. That’s because there could be negative effects on the health of the non-vapers they expose to second-hand vapor.

Second-Hand Vapor is Not Smoke

This is vapor that people exhale after inhaling from their vapes vapingdaily.com learn here. Technically, this is the aerosol that a vaper releases to the atmosphere. Just like second-hand smoke from a smoker, this vapor lingers in the surrounding air for some time. That means a person near the vaper can inhale it. This is more likely to happen if a person vaporizes in a small room.

However, bystanders do not inhale second-hand smoke. That’s because vaping does not involve smoking. Therefore, no smoke is produced. Smoke is produced when a cigarette is combusted. Burning leaves, wood, tobacco, or building, produces carcinogenic particles, volatile gasses, or carbon monoxide. Tar is also produced.

But, second-hand smoke may not have the same level of dangerous effects with first-hand smoke. However, prolonged exposure to second-hand smoke is a serious hazard.

Vaping produces vapor when e-liquid is heated using an atomizer. The atomizer has a metal coil that turns e-liquid into the vapor that a person inhales. Unlike smoke, this vapor does not have tar or carbon monoxide. But, research has shown that this vapor has dangerous metals and chemicals. Nevertheless, they are in small amounts.

Therefore, vaping exposes a person to a tiny toxicants level when compared to smoking. That means even the dangers of second-hand vapor are lower than those of second-hand smoke.

Composition of Second-Hand Vapor

When a person uses the best vape in a room, second-hand vapor comes from their mouth and lung then into space. Vaping does not have side stream vapor or smoke like smoking a traditional cigarette. When a person smokes a traditional cigarette, smoke is emitted constantly. This is not the case with vaping.

For a vaping device to produce vaper, the user must inhale. By the time a person exhales, the substances found in the vapor are relatively low. That’s because the vaper absorbs most of these substances via the throat, lungs, and mouth. Second-hand vapor, therefore, might not be a serious thing for bystanders since they get very little content.

Glycerin and propylene glycol are the basis of most e-liquids. But, apart from these, the vapor that is exhaled by a vaper does not have a high level of toxicants. Research has shown that though the contents of electronic cigarettes vapor that a user inhales justify monitoring, there is little contamination that is exhaled in it. Thus, people that inhale second-hand vapor are less likely to be at risk.

What a vaper doesn’t inhale usually falls to off. And if a person is concerned about third-hand nicotine, it usually lands on furniture and floors if it is not absorbed. Thus, the only case that can be made here is about vaping around pets or kids that may lick the nicotine from those surfaces. Nevertheless, settle residue doesn’t have much nicotine.

Therefore, as long as, a person uses one of the best types of vapes, there is no way they can endanger those around them with second-hand vapor. That’s because the components of second-hand vapor are very low and they don’t have a plausible mechanism by which they can enter the human body.

What’s more, particles released from vaping are in liquid form and not solid form like is the case with smoking. And, these particles do not seem to affect the quality of the air at all. This was revealed by a study conducted in 2017 at the University of California, San Diego. This research involved homes of families with low incomes. Researchers established that smoking marijuana or tobacco, burning candles, and cooking affected the counts of particles in these homes. However, vaping didn’t have a measurable effect on the quality of indoor air.

Studies on the effects of second-hand vapor have also been done in vape shops where the best vapes on the market are sold and used. These have also shown that toxicants levels are below the limits of occupational exposure.

So, How Bad is Second-Hand Vaping?

Considering the findings of the studies cited in this article and others, there are no health risks associated with second-hand vapor via a comprehensive scientific study. Exposure to second-hand vaping is likely to be an order of magnitude less and therefore doesn’t pose apparent concerns. This means that exposure to second-hand vapor toxic chemicals is very light to a level where it can’t pose a real threat.

When a person uses the best vape, the risk they expose themselves to is likely to be 10 times, 100 times, 1000 times, or even 10,000 times lower the risk they expose bystanders to. But, does this give vapers the right to expose bystanders or non-vapers to second-hand smoke? The answer is an absolute no!

Though no research has conclusively proven that second-hand vaping is harmful to the people around a vaper, it’s important to respect their concerns. So, if you vape at home and your friends or family members are concerned about exposure to second-hand vapor, respect their concerns. Thus, if your spouse or even visitor objects having you vaporize around them, be thoughtful and courteous enough to go and enjoy vaping away from them. Most importantly, if you have a family member with a medical condition like asthma, avoid vaping around them. That’s because some flavorings and propylene glycol can irritate their airways, leading to asthma attacks.

Additionally, children don’t have much choice. Therefore, use your judgment and be cautious when vaping if you have them around.

The Bottom Line

No study has conclusively proven that second-hand vaping is harmful to other people. However, vapers should not experiment with children or their loved ones. What’s more, vapers should read the best vape reviews to buy quality devices. This will enable them to enjoy great vaping experiences without exposing others to toxicants.

 

21 Things You Need To Do If You Want To Live A Happy And Meaningful Life

By
Riley Cooper
Things You Need To Do If You Want To Live A Happy And Meaningful Life

How can I achieve happiness? Am I trying hard enough to achieve my goals? What else should I do so that I can feel that I am content with my life? – are questions we are all familiar with.

Unfortunately, there are many people who are not aware that they do things that prevent them from achieving happiness and success. Are you wondering what those things are?

Here are 21 things you need to do if you want to live a happy and meaningful life:

1. Live your life in accordance with your own beliefs, principles, and values. You’re the only one who can direct your own life.

2. Stand up for yourself when someone is criticizing you and judging you.

3. Stick to the people that matter to you. Make sure you keep the people who make you feel happy and fulfilled always in your life.

4. Distance yourself from people who drain your energy and suck the happiness out of you.

5. Learn how to be in touch with your emotions. Learn to embrace your negative feelings and never be ashamed of them.

6. Spend less time on social media.

7. Forgive those who have done you wrong and hurt you. Carrying resentment and bitterness in your heart will never do you any good.

8. Accept and love yourself just the way you are. Embrace your annoying habits, quirks, insecurities, fears, and wounds.

9. Don’t try to always be there for everyone around you. Not every person you help will appreciate that.

10. Don’t blame yourself for your mistakes. Instead, learn from them.

11. Never compare your own happiness and successes to those of other people.

12. Never forget to practice self-care and self-love.

13. Always be yourself!

14. Find the strength to give up your bad habits and develop new ones that will contribute to your health and happiness.

15. Treat other people with kindness, compassion, respect, and dignity.

16. Treat yourself the same way as well.

17. Let go of everything that is not important to you in life.

18. Always tell others the truth, no matter how harsh and painful it might be.

19. Never let what other people think of you determine your worth.

20. Never blame others for your mistakes and shortcomings. Instead, take responsibility for all your actions.

21. Ask yourself if you’re the person you’ve wanted to be. If you are not, keep working on it.

How to Actually Enjoy a Formal Party When You’re an Introvert

By
Elizabeth Williams

Fall has just begun, and before we know it, it’ll be the holiday season, which can often bring with it lots of parties and events, sometimes including large, formal parties, depending on your job and your group of friends. While many people misunderstand introversion as meaning that introverts don’t actually like social events at all, and don’t enjoy parties of any kind, most introverts do prefer to socialize in smaller groups where they don’t need to be introduced to lots of people at once and make small talk, and can also find the pressure of more formal parties such as black tie galas stressful.

If this sounds like you, and rather than looking forward to these annual events, you’d rather find an excuse to stay at home or just spend a peaceful evening with your friends in a less extravagant context, then you may sometimes dread these social obligations. However, if you plan ahead and focus on the right aspects of the occasion, it can easily be possible to enjoy the party just as much as the social butterflies. Here are some tips:

Choose Something to Wear That Makes You Feel Great

One of the best things about formal events is that you can dress up and look your best, and it can be quite satisfying to see all the people you see every day at work, or in other ordinary situations when you’re feeling like you look a lot more special. Christmas parties can give you an excuse to wear the most glamorous clothes, and so you can have a lot of fun choosing a dress for the occasion, trying on stuff you wouldn’t normally have an excuse to wear and even taking inspiration from red carpet fashion.

Whether you’re interested in fashion in general or just want to enjoy yourself and feel good at the party, shopping for a look for the event can be enjoyable, and of course, it’s also something you can do online if you don’t feel like dealing with the stores in the run-up to the holidays!

Check out Jovani, who have an amazing range of stunning evening dresses and formal gowns perfect for black tie parties and glamorous work events. If you want to, you can even go for something that really fits the Christmas mood, like velvet green dresses. For instance, there’s these Jovani velvet green dresses that can give you a glamorous look that is seasonal and classy, and just putting on a gorgeous dress like one of these will have you feeling positive and ready to have fun!

Get the Mingling Out of the Way Early

If you find chatting with people you don’t know very well or have just met stressful or exhausting, but are obligated to do it because of the party having a networking element, then it’s a good idea to do this early when everyone is first arriving and having drinks. This lets you do the rounds while your social energy levels are at their highest, and will mean you can spend the later parts of the evening, when you may be less energized and have a lower tolerance for small talk and introductions, with the people you know best or the person you brought as your date or guest, allowing you to enjoy a more intimate celebration.

Look Forward to Some of the Features of the Party

Rather than feeling stressed in the run-up to the party about all of the social interactions you imagine you’ll be forced to tolerate, instead think about the bits of the party you will enjoy the most. Will there be a really entertaining after-dinner speaker? Will there be a delicious meal? Are there going to be any exciting announcements, or things like industry awards given out, which can be interesting and fun?

Even if you are only looking forward to the dessert, or the champagne, or the funny speeches, having something in your mind that you know you’re going to like at the occasion and thinking about that instead of the aspects you don’t think you’ll like so much, can help you talk yourself into actually feeling positive and excited about going. It can also make you feel more like joining in conversations with others who seem to be looking forward to the party, rather than feeling left out for not being as hyped for it as they are.

Social occasions can take more work to enjoy for introverted people, but it is definitely possible to have a lot of fun at a formal event and also to spend the run-up to it looking forward to it rather than wishing that you didn’t have to go! Why not try some of these ideas for your big holiday events this year?

Everything In Life Happens For A Reason: Here’s Why You Should Believe In This Philosophy

By
Riley Cooper
Everything In Life Happens For A Reason

“Everything in life happens for a reason” is a concept we are all familiar with. And yes, it’s a concept which is difficult to understand or believe in when life hands us lemons, but it couldn’t be truer.

Every person that comes into our lives, every person that leaves, every choice we make, every result which arises from these choices, and every problem, loss, and pain we experience – all of these happen for a reason. They are all blessings given to us to learn from.

The truth is that regardless of how much we try to control every aspect of our lives, there’re things which we just can’t have control over. Life doesn’t always go according to plan. The universe or fate, or you name it, can throw our way challenges, temptations, problems, and pain when we least expect it.

And all these are not coincidences or mistakes. They are blessings given to us to learn from. That’s why we have to be open to the difficulty and pain. We have to be open to what it’s we’re supposed to learn from an experience. We have to understand that everything which happens in life happens for a reason.

Here are 6 reasons why you should believe in this philosophy:

1. It makes it easier for some people to deal with adversity.

Thinking that everything in life happens for a reason makes it easier for some people to deal with health issues, financial crises, relationship problems, loss of a loved one, and even natural disasters, such as floods and earthquakes. Thinking that such events can be perceived as the outcome of accidents, and maybe even of chance gives them the strength to face adversity and move forward.

2. It alleviates your pain.

It might be hard to believe that there’s a reason behind losing a loved one. When you’re faced with such pain, it’s easier to blame someone or something than believe that everything which happens in life happens for a reason.

But, believing in this philosophy can alleviate your pain and enable you to heal.

Everything In Life Happens For A Reason

3. It gives you closure.

When certain things don’t go according to plan, we tend to regret them and we sometimes even blame ourselves for not trying to control the outcome better.

For instance, let’s say you’ve recently broken up with your boyfriend/girlfriend.  While it’s normal to feel disappointed about it and feel a deep sense of loss at first, you can choose to use this painful experience as an opportunity to learn something new about yourself and about how relationships work.  You can learn from this experience what behaviors benefit relationships and what behaviors can cause even the strongest relationship to fall apart.

4. It leads you to the transformative moments of your life.

If you’ve ever had that “aha!” moment in your life, then you know what I’m talking about. Instead of being stuck on a difficulty, pain, or negativity, you have chosen to believe that everything in life happens for a divine purpose and reason.

When you experience your most transformative and defining moments, you realize that everything finally makes sense. You realize that these transformative moments give your life new direction and change the connection you have with other people as well as with yourself.

5. It helps you understand the chaos in your life.

We have all experienced hard and painful situations when completely nothing makes sense. Thinking that everything in life happens for a reason can be very comforting when bad things happen. It’s soothing to believe that there’s a purpose or a plan behind every problem, loss, or pain we face in life.

This philosophy allows us to focus on those parts of our lives that do make sense. And this makes us make better decisions in the future and gives us purpose, strength, and motivation to move forward.

6. Last but not least, it teaches you important lessons.

As I’ve already said – every problem, loss, and pain we experience in life is a blessing and a valuable lesson given to us to learn from. Although it’s difficult for us to understand why certain things happen when life gets difficult at first, there always comes a moment when we realize that there’s a divine purpose and reason behind everything that happens to us.

Because everything that happens to us allows us to learn new things about ourselves and the world around us. It allows us to change and grow. It allows us to transform ourselves into a better version of ourselves.

12 Ways to Relieve Anxiety

By
Elizabeth Williams

Anxiety is something we may experience from thinking forward too much. We might try to imagine how something will play out or what will happen. While we may attribute anxiety to specific events, it’s long-term anxiety that keeps us from the things we enjoy, making it difficult to appreciate our time.

We can manage and decrease the effect of anxiety in our lives. Everyone has a preferred way of coping with their anxiety. Nonetheless, here are a few tried and true ways if you’re still finding yours.

1) Stay in the Present

Anxiety often comes from the perspective of thinking about the future and trying to find the answers to things we can’t predict. It preys on our general sense of concern or worry. It’s important to examine these anxious thoughts and conjectures. This way, we can choose to live in the present, focusing on one task at a time and using planning methods.

2) Examine the Source

Anxiety is often a fear response that can come from blowing things out of proportion. One way to examine the source of your anxiety is to fact check the things you’re stressed about. It can also help to talk with others who have gone through similar experiences.

3) Straighten Your Posture and Breathe Evenly

Straighter posture not only gives you a rush of confidence, but it also allows your lungs more space to fully inflate. Additionally, breathing techniques are a proven way of reducing stress and managing anxiety levels.

4) Make Actions Toward Accomplishing Goals

Anxiety and fear may often cause us to procrastinate and put off our goals. Procrastination, while it may seem comforting at the time, only elongates and exacerbates certain kinds of anxiety. Rather than procrastinating, take some time to understand and plan out your approach, this will make you feel more solid and sure of yourself when you step out into uncharted territory.

5) Get Another Perspective on the Issue

Sometimes a little talking on the subject can go a long way toward relieving your fears. Getting an alternate perspective can help you to think about the problem differently. At the same time, talking to someone else about it can help you to feel a much-needed sense of support and safety.

6) Find a Way to Get a Good Laugh

Laughing offers us a physical release of stress and anxiety, and having lots of laughter in your life can benefit your overall mental health. Find yourself a way to laugh, whether it’s enjoying some comedy or chatting with a friend who always knows how to make you smile.

7) Get Some Exercise

Endorphins from physical activity will not only lighten your mood, but they will also give you a confidence boost. This helps with motivation and self-efficacy. Next time you’re feeling anxious, go for a walk, take a hike out in nature, flow into yoga, or even lift some weights in the gym.

8) Be Aware of What You’re Eating

Avoid eating too much sugar, which can worsen anxious feelings. At the same time, keep track of how much caffeine you consume. Instead, when you feel your energy starting to lag, reach for some water and stretch your legs in a brief walk.

9) Keep a Journal

Writing can help you identify the source of your feelings while also giving you an outlet to vent any frustration and personal needs or desires. It doesn’t have to be frequent, but having a safe space that you can pull out whenever you’re feeling a lot of doubt or anxiety can offer huge mental health benefits.

10) Spend time with Your Loved Ones

Social support can go a long way toward helping us tackle our problems. But aside from that just spending time with the people we care about, including our friends and family, can help to relieve anxiety and give our lives a sense of purpose.

11) Regulate Your Sleep Cycles

Sleep cycles do more than determine how much energy we have in a day. They also regulate our ability to focus, how stressed we feel, bodily processes that we may take for granted, such as hormone balance and metabolism, and our overall mood. If your anxiety is linked to irregular sleep cycles, it might be time to make a more regular bedtime and morning alarm.

12) Take Some Time for Yourself

In the end, if you’ve been working too hard or dwelling too long in a state of anxiety, one of the best options for you could be to take some time away. Time away helps you to regain perspective, compartmentalize the things that bring you down, and open up wider and more fulfilling aspects of your life. For some, this might mean using a handheld massager to relieve accumulated muscle tension, taking a screen-free day, and truly decompressing. For others it will mean adventuring, indulging in a favorite hobby, and finding avenues of personal expansion.

Anxiety is personal, tied to individual experiences and the way we react to them. This also means that anxiety relief is a personal matter. Try out a few different methods, allow yourself to really engage with them, and see what works for you.

Why Is It A Really Good Idea To Read Self-Help Books?

By
Elizabeth Williams

Specialists recommend that you read at least one part of a personal development book per day. This means that you end up reading a few pages, around one chapter, when you feel comfortable to do so. It can be in the morning or in the afternoon. Also, with the help of services like Blinkist you can read more because of the way in which they summarize books, including self-help titles.

Specialists do tell you to read self-development books but most people do not do this. Why is that? It is because there are different benefits that are gained when you do this. The most important ones are presented below.

A More Positive View Of The World

Self-help books are inspiring. When you read passages from inspiring books every single day, the brain is practically flooded with uplifting concepts and positive words. Simply put, you end up feeling better every single day and you have more mental strength to tackle whatever the world throws in your direction.

Taking More Positive Actions

Reading self-help books inspires you to take more positive actions and make the better choice. And you do them more often. Most of the personal development titles on the market include prompts and exercises that make you think about choices made and the reason behind them.

It is always really important to honestly evaluate one’s life. This frees your mind and inspires you to make really good choices. At the end of the day, you end up feeling a lot better about you and the actions that you take since you are aware of why you actually take them.

You Enhance Your Life

People will tell you that reading inspiring books every day aims to improve life. In reality, it is much more than that. This practice can enhance your entire life.

Personal development always aims to expand those things that you got. You do not improve things that you lack. By reading self-help books you become aware of the difference between enhancing and improving. You end up being more focused on the things that matter.

You Destroy Limitations

Self-help books help you to actually believe that you will be able to do more. Many do not improve simply because they have mental blocks. They think that they cannot experience more or do more. Inspiring words pouring towards you every day inspire you to explore limits, capabilities and actually destroy the identified limits.

You can only become better and stronger when you take a risk and you dare to go towards an area of your life that you do not know. You want to experience something that is new to you. However, this is impossible if you are not inspired to do it. You also want to be confident. Self-help books help with this, a lot more than what you might initially think.

Conclusions

As you can see, reading self-help books every single day helps. You should make this a habit and you should take those needed steps to improve your life.

Social Emotional Learning Curriculum for Adults: Is it too late?

By
Elizabeth Williams

Quick answer: No. Social emotional learning curriculums are mostly prepared for children. However, adults need them as much as children do!

According to the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL), social emotional learning (SEL) is the process through which students develop and apply the skills they need to process and manage their emotions, set and achieve positive goals, be empathic towards others, make good decisions, and build and maintain good relationships.

A social emotional learning curriculum is usually developed and offered to children but that doesn’t mean adults can’t learn from these programs, too. In fact, adults would need them just as much as kids would.

Social Emotional Learning Curriculums for Kids and Adults: What’s the Difference? 

Although SEL curriculums all aim for the same thing, the way they are taught or presented will depend highly on the students’ needs and capabilities. In this case, a child’s needs and capabilities are different from an adult’s.

Correction

Compared to children, most adults are very much experienced in handling or dealing with social situations. Whether these experiences are good or bad would depend on their social and emotional skills.

By adulthood, many people would have learned skills and behaviors that do not necessarily contribute to their SEL growth.

In a social emotional learning curriculum for adults, these behaviors must be corrected – they should be addressed and unlearned. This, of course, will not only take time, but also a lot of effort from both the student and the facilitator.

Children would only require very minimal to no correction at all. This makes it easier for them to learn. So, a curriculum for adults must take this in consideration.

Repetition

It’s a well-known fact that children learn faster than adults. The fact of the matter is: children are just built to learn. They’re fresh minds – sponges.

Adults, on the other hand, can be expected to be more distracted and to have a more challenging time learning and retaining all that they’ve learned.

A scientific explanation for this would be the development of a person’s prefrontal cortex. Children, with their still-developing prefrontal cortex, are able to think and perceive things more creatively. Adults, with their developed prefrontal cortex, tend to see things as they are – no imagination or creativity required.

When learning a new thing, this can definitely become a blocker for adults. So an SEL curriculum for adults should be focused on repetition and retention to address this blocker and be truly effective.

Impact 

Children in school don’t really have much to worry about but school. Most adults would have 10,000 other responsibilities to take care of as soon as they step out of their SEL class. Because adults are exposed to more diverse social situations, you can expect that an adult SEL class would contain more advanced lessons.

SEL programs for adults are made to be more impactful so as to make a real difference in an adult’s day-to-day life – teaching them how SEL can have positive effects on their decision making skills, work/professional careers, relationships with others, family life, etc.

Being able to apply SEL in the many different aspects in the life of an adult helps students retain their learnings better.

How Adult SEL Programs Help Develop SEL Programs for Children

Although teaching SEL to children is more preferred than teaching SEL to adults, the latter actually helps in the development of programs to do the former.

Think about it. Who facilitates social emotional learning curriculums for kids? Adults, of course!

So before schools even think about promoting SEL to children, they focus on strengthening adult SEL. Aside from focusing on helping adults develop emotion and stress management skills as well as other social and emotional skills, they also work hard to foster a supportive staff, classroom, and school environment to develop social and emotional competence of the adults facilitating SEL programs for children.

According to CASEL, schools find it easier to teach and even reinforce SEL to children when SEL for adults is also cultivated. The success of the SEL implementation in a school greatly depends on how the staff facilitate the SEL instruction and model their own social and emotional competence.

Adult SEL: Implementing Social Economic Learning  Curriculum in School 

To properly implement social emotional learning curriculums in school, the participation of a great number of adults would be needed. This doesn’t only involve teachers, too. All adults in the school – from the principal to even the lunchroom and janitorial staff – must participate.

This won’t just be helpful for SEL programs for children, this also promotes and nurtures a work environment for everyone to feel supported and able to build and strengthen their social and emotional skills in a personal and professional setting.

Proper implementation of an SEL program would require the following from every adult in the school:

Learning Efforts 

Each adult in school should be actively learning to build their own capacity for SEL as well as their capacity to support SEL in their co-workers and students.

This would require them to reflect on their personal SEL skills, practice self-care, and create personalized SEL learning plans.

 Collaborative Efforts 

Adults in school are taught to be team players. They are expected to support each other via internal structures like professional learning communities and peer mentoring circles.

These structures allow adults to collaborate – discuss SEL strategies, support and encourage each other’s SEL growth, and integrate SEL into staff meetings. 

Setting an Example 

Each adult is expected to set an example as the school implements its social emotional learning curriculum. They are to model SEL competencies, showcase SEL mindsets and strategies, and practice their skills throughout the entire school community – this means that they have to be a good role model to their fellow peers, their students, and even their students’ families.

One challenge schools face is the actual implementation of SEL programs for adults. It’s not an easy feat and in some cases, it could take years of consistent training.

The benefits of an adult SEL program far exceed the challenges, though, and it’s something all schools should definitely look into!

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