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10 Ways To Salvage Your Relationship When It Feels Like It’s Going To Fall Apart

Listen to me.

We’re all going through the same difficulties in life.

But if you are not happy with where your relationship is headed, that doesn’t mean that it is all over. You shouldn’t give up that easily.

I know that every connection is a different story, but as a true fighter for love, I like to believe that there is no issue that cannot be resolved if the two sides work together.

That said, I would like to share with you what worked for me and my partner. I hope that this helps you find some common ground and salvage your relationship:

1. Be open with each other and communicate. Communication is the key to a successful and thriving relationship. And one of the worst possible things you can do is leave your partner without actually talking about the issues you are going through.

2. Try therapy for a change. If you cannot find a way to meet each other halfway and openly talk about your relationship, there’s always counseling. You may not believe in therapy, but once you try you will be surprised at how helpful it is to talk to someone who is completely objective on the subject.

3. Start saying YES more often. If things aren’t the way they’re supposed to be, try being a bit more positive about the whole situation. Change your routine. Get out of your comfort zone. Say yes to adventures and things that you’ve never imagined yourself doing.

4. Release yourself from all the negative memories. Promise each other that you will let go of everything that is weighing you down and then do that. Start with a clean slate and allow yourself to feel those amazing butterflies in your stomach. Forget the negativity and try to work things out.

5. Have patience. It’s one thing to talk about the issues with your partner and a completely another to actually see the changes happening. You cannot expect your partner to immediately transform into a different person. You have to be patient with them. Allow them to reflect on themselves, analyze their own actions and start making the initial steps.

6. Set goals for your relationship. Communication is important indeed, but it is not the only thing that a relationship requires. Instead of only talking about it, try setting certain goals for your future. Start doing more things together. Whether it’s exercising, dancing, hiking or any other activity you enjoy, spending more time together will help you reconnect faster.

7. Stop trying to plan everything and do something spontaneous and unpredictable for once. Remember how fun life was when you weren’t so obsessed with planning your entire weeks and months beforehand? Well, why don’t you do that more often? We are all following certain routines in life. Knowing how to maintain a balance and live life at the moment is what matters the most.

8. Leave your phones aside when you are together. When you are spending time together, be together. Don’t let technology distract you. Disconnect yourself from the virtual life and pay attention to your partner.

9. Book a trip somewhere new and get lost. We are always busy, tired or broke. Making excuses is our strongest suit. Well, to hell with it. You only get one life. Why would you let it pass away just like that?

Make time for yourself and book a trip to a place that you’ve never been to. Get lost and find yourself. Surrender yourself to the adventure and reignite the fire in your souls.

10. Work on yourself. Whatever you do, don’t ever forget to look at yourself in the mirror. For it is only when we become the best versions of ourselves that we can start to create better relationships as well.

Why Being Near Water Really Does Make Us Happier

Have you ever wondered why the most popular holiday destinations are on the beach, near the ocean? Do you ever get this sense of complete calm when you are near a mass of water?  Even think about it, some of the most romantic places to take stroll are by the seaside or along the beach.

There is a scientific explanation as to why people like to be around water; it is because it has a calming effect on our brains.  We lead busy lifestyles, and sometimes the brain overloads.  But, if you take a minute and look at large masses of water and listen to the soothing sounds, your mind will enter a relaxed, almost hypnotic stage, instantly giving you a sense of calm.

The blue color of the ocean or sea also has a role to play.  Many people associate the color blue with openness, calmness, wisdom, and depth.  This could explain why it is a favorite color for many people.

Why does water have such a positive effect?

Being around water allows us to go back to our ‘blue mind,’ a place where you can escape the over stimulation that comes with modern life. You give your mind the chance to restore and rejuvenate itself. The use of nature in promoting a sense of calmness is not an entirely new concept. For a long time, the focus has been on the benefits of nature, but now there is more interest in water and its effects on humans.

One of the theories that try to answer the question above has to do with the acoustics of water. Auditory neuroscientists say that a pleasurable sound has a predictive pattern.  The patterns are volumes that are soft, low pitches and harmonic frequencies which occur at predictable intervals.  Much like what you would observe if you were to take a look at the rhythm of the ocean.

More disruptive sounds like traffic result in the body releasing cortisol, a stress hormone, which leads to tension, increased heart rate, and anxiety. Exposure to the sounds of the ocean will immediately lead to lower stress levels and a more calm state for the individual.

Studies have shown that the pleasure that an individual achieves by being near water is better than the satisfaction they would get if they had gone for a shopping trip. Even when looking at pictures taken during a vacation, the individual will get a better feeling when going through pictures taken at the beach, than those taken during a spending spree. 

Water and Meditation 

Hearing and seeing water in motion will induce a meditative state. There is a direct link between the sound of waves and brain patterns. The benefit is lower depression, less anxiety, mental clarity, and better sleep patterns.

Ask anyone who lives by the ocean if they have a problem sleeping, and we can bet that the answer will be a resounding no! You will even find alarm clocks that have the sound of waves; the white noise they generate is a great way to put yourself to sleep.  Do the same in the toddler’s room, and your days of singing lullabies will be long gone.

Even if you do not have access to the ocean or seaside, how about getting an aquarium or small water fountain for your house.  The auditory and visual cues will give you the same level of peace as you would get if you were by the seaside.

 Water and Inspiration

It is not an uncommon sight to find an artist sitting on the beach. Poets, painters, writers to name a few, say that being around water gives them a feeling of peace and wellness.  Water has a calming effect on the mind and will allow you to focus better while getting rid of anything that can lead to stress or anxiety. You’ll find that you are more creative because your mind is open enough to get inspiration from everywhere else. How about a kayak excursion to relieve the stress of the week? Choose a good quality kayak and see the positive effects of paddling and being around water.

Water and Exercise

Imagine trying to jog along a sidewalk or within an enclosed gym environment. Now imagine jogging at the beach, which one has a more calming effect?  The blue space will help you enjoy the exercise better, thereby significantly adding to your sense of well-being.

If you prefer not to jog, you can take a dip in the ocean, not only is it extremely pleasurable, but it is a great form of physical exercise.

Hydrate well after exercising, even if you are near a large mass of water. It will help you reduce joint and muscle tension and keep your skin smooth.

Water and Awe

If you stand near a large body of water, you will get a feeling of Awe. You suddenly realize how ‘small’ you are in comparison to the universe. The Awe will temper your ego, expand your sense of wonderment, make you more generous, and generally allow you to be more content with your lot in life.

Water and Negative Ions

The air around water has minerals that can help us reduce stress. The Negative ions help with oxygen flow to the brain, thereby giving us more energy and increasing levels of alertness.  Saltwater is especially helpful because it elevates the levels of serotonin, melatonin, and tryptamine, which help with keeping away depression.

Final Thoughts

Humans naturally gravitate towards water anytime they feel a need to relax or are thinking up of a holiday destination.  Think about the number of times you have come home from work, and all you want to do is soak in a hot bathtub, or go for a swim.  Water has a calming effect, and there is science to back it up.  The sounds will induce a feeling of calmness; the negative ions will lead to the release of hormones that lower stress, among others.

The best thing about it is that even if you do not have access to the ocean or sea, just staring at the fish happily swimming away in the aquarium will have the same effect.

Retirement: How to manage yours and stay happy

It’s a funny old period. At one stage of our lives, we think that it will never happen to us. Then, we’re counting down to the day. As you have probably gathered, today’s post is all about retirement. It’s an age that a lot of people simply can’t wait to get to but don’t for a minute think that it’s going to be a walk in the park.

On the contrary, a lot of retirees are shocked at the change in lifestyle as soon as they leave the world of work. Everything turns on its head, and it even causes bouts of depression amongst some. To help you ease into this period, we have put together today’s guide. Let’s now take a look at just what you can do to make the retirement process a little easier, and make yourself happier as well.

Expect turbulent emotions

First and foremost, this is a turbulent period of your life. If you have retired at the standard age, you will have probably been working for decades. In other words, work is pretty much all you know.

Suddenly, you have been thrust out of something which has almost become a comfort zone. You will be asking yourself what you will do through the days but fear not, over time this rollercoaster of emotions will slow down, and retirement will eventually feel “normal”.

Get your finances into shape

As you try and comprehend your new situation, the last thing you need is for your finances to be all over the place. Now is the time to establish your financial position and calculate your true income and expenses.

This might mean factoring in new costs, like how much it costs to pay for your funeral, future care or anything else you haven’t had to have considered in the past. Once you have established this, your mind can at least function a little more calmly. You can compare funeral plan quotes for free at Reassured.

Start with a structure

One of the biggest reasons why so many people struggle to adapt to retirement is because of the lack of structure. Let’s not forget that for the last few years, your job has forced you into a regular routine. Now that you are retired, you are left to your own devices.

Bearing this in mind, one of the easiest ways to cope with this phase is to create a new structure. It might be setting an alarm clock each and every day, having specific times to visit the shops or the gym, and so on. By subscribing to this model, you’ll find things a lot easier to adapt to.

You’re not too old to make friends (or keep existing ones)

Another potential pitfall of retirement is that you can start to lose friends. This is where you have to make an extra effort to either make them or keep them. You can no longer rely on colleagues that you have been used to seeing every day – you need additional stimulation.

This is another method that can fill up your days, and add that elusive structure that we have just been referring to.

Church Lets Homeless People Sleep Inside Every Night

church lets homeless people

Homelessness is a grave issue that exists all over the world and one that can’t be ignored. What’s even worse, in some cities, the problem of homelessness is almost an epidemic. Considering the staggering number of over 7,000 homeless people that are wandering the streets in San Francisco, this puts the city in the national top 10 for homeless population.

Luckily, not everyone ignores this problem as some good Samaritans are giving their best to help solve this grave issue.

St. Boniface Church in San Francisco is the place where approximately 225 homeless people seek rest and safety in every night, thanks to The Gubbio Project. The Gubbio Project was founded in 2004 to address the issue of homelessness, i.e. help provide homeless people with locations where they can find safety, sleep, and eat.

St. Boniface Church opens its doors for the homeless every night so that they can find a safe, warm, peaceful place to sleep. The homeless are also provided with blankets and hygiene kits and some who are experiencing discomfort or physical pain are even offered massages.

The kindness, care, and love that are constantly offered to the homeless in this church are truly boundless.

If you want to learn more about this amazing project, make sure you watch the video below.

 

Groomer Arrested For Breaking Service Dog’s Tail Because The Dog Didn’t Want To Calm Down

Dogs are the purest creatures that ever walked the earth. I know this from my own personal experience. If you don’t believe it, you can ask any dog lover and they would tell you that there is no other animal that connects as deeply as dogs do with their favorite humans.

I’ve always said that we don’t deserve them. And as it turns out, we really don’t.

We’ve all witnessed animal cruelty. We’ve all seen how brutal, wicked and extremely evil humans can be towards animals. But what you are about to see will shock you beyond belief.

A few months ago, an eight-year-old German Shepard called TT from Florida has experienced something inexplicable horrifying. This dog is a therapy dog that is a live-in friend to a veteran who struggles with PTSD.

According to WKMG, TT was taken to Groomingdales Pet Spa (located in Satellite Beach) to enjoy its usual grooming treatment. However, instead of being groomed and well taken care of, the dog ended up beaten and badly injured.

The person responsible for this horrible act is James Cordell Doughty Suthann, the thirty-seven-year-old pet spa employee. According to him, the dog wouldn’t calm down, so he did what he thought was necessary. In an attempt to lift the dog from the ground, he grabbed the tail and snapped it. Poor TT was left in pain. But that didn’t make James stop. In fact, he proceeded to hurt the dog by hitting it in the head with the hose.

Tell me what kind of a person hurts animals and shows no remorse whatsoever?

Only a monster.

The only good thing from all this is the fact that James was immediately fired and arrested. Luckily the Groomingdales Pet Spa uses cameras, so the entire incident was recorded. Brevard County Sheriff Wayne Ivey saw the video. He said it was one of the worst things he had seen during his 39 years in law enforcement.

As for TT, doctors tried hard to save its broken tail, but the grave injuries made it very difficult to do so. So, the only option they were left with was amputation. The most important thing is that TT is alive and is slowly healing her wounds. She went through a big trauma, but she is slowly recovering from it.

If you ask me, hurting an animal is not different from hurting a human being. A person who can do this to a dog, will not hesitate to do it to another person. So, I truly hope that animal abusers will finally be punished for their heinous crimes to the fullest extent of the law.

Bellow is a videotape from the incident. But be advised. It contains graphic images, so it is not for the faint-hearted.

Sources: FoxNews  |Independent

40-Year-Old Women Are Giving Heartfelt And Honest Advice To Their 20-Year-Old Younger Selves

Life passes by very quickly. Sometimes minutes feel like hours and hours feel like infinity, but it is only when you look back that you understand how much time has passed by.

We spend our childhoods wanting to grow up. Then we grow up and we spend our entire lives waiting for those weekends, paychecks, vacations and special events. All the while we forget that life is more than just those special, pre-planned moments. We forget to smile to strangers; we forget to enjoy the present moment and ultimately, we forget to live.

So, I think that you’d all agree that it is truly encouraging and inspiring to have someone remind you of this every once in a while. Especially when that someone has already successfully made it to the other side of the decade.

That is the reason why I am writing this. A few months ago I caught myself barely living. I was practically surviving. But luckily, I came across something that slapped me and woke me up from my ugly dream. So, I am about to do the same thing to you.

What ultimately made me rethink my choice in life was a tweet I saw on social media. A few months ago, Professor Nyasha Junior (@NyashaJunior) had posted a callout for life advice on Twitter. She challenged 40+ women to share the most valuable lessons that they’ve learned in life. In a nutshell, she asked them to give their 20-year-old selves a piece of advice.

Women from all over the globe were lucky to answer this question and share what they’ve learned over their 4 decades of life on Earth. From opinions about love and heartbreak, friendships, to self-care and wearing more comfortable clothes, they were happy to give mindful and honest pearls of wisdom.

Here are some of their best tweets. I hope you find this encouraging and motivational enough. Life is what happens when you are busy making plans. Never forget that.

Man Wins $344.6 Million Lottery Jackpot Using Numbers From Fortune Cookie

Who would say that a fortune cookie could make you hundreds of millions of dollars wealthier? Well, this is exactly what happened to Charles W. Jackson Jr. a retired retailer from North Carolina on June 4.

Jackson won $344.6 million Powerball jackpot using a series of numbers from a fortune cookie his granddaughter got at a Vietnamese restaurant.

At a news conference at North Carolina Education Lottery headquarters, Jackson said that he didn’t expect to win the lottery, let alone a jackpot worth $344.6 million. “You play to win, but you don’t ever expect to win,” he told the reporters.

It’s interesting to mention that initially, Jackson thought he had only won $50,000. But, when he headed to Raleigh to collect his prize, he checked his numbers against the Powerball drawing and he realized that he’d actually won the jackpot, “Dang, I got them all,” he said.

Jackson will face a high tax bill on his massive prize, which will leave him with approximately $158 million.

He said that he plans to donate some of his money to Shriners Hospitals for Children, St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, and the Wounded Warrior Project. He also plans to give his brother $1 million as they have a deal.

This lucky retiree said he hopes that the prize doesn’t change him. He also added: “I’m still going to wear my jeans — maybe newer ones.”

 

Woman Finds Out Her Severe Headache Has Been Caused By A Spider Living In Her Ear Canal

We all get headaches from time to time. Sometimes they are due to stress, dehydration, or high blood pressure. And sometimes they are due to a change in the weather or staring at the television and computer monitors for a long time. But, no matter what the reason is, seldom do we think that it is anything serious. And seldom would we think that our headache is due to a real spider living in our ear.

But, one woman from India had this exact problem. Lekshmi, a woman living in Karnataka, India, was dealing with a severe headache and she decided to go to a hospital. Upon reaching the hospital, the doctors carefully examined her and they were in disbelief when they discovered that her splitting headache was due to a spider living in her ear canal.

Lekshmi’s story is definitely freakish enough to make you want to shake out both your clothes and hair to see if any potential eight-legged creature squats on your body.

Now, before you decide to do that, it is worth mentioning that the cause of Lekshmi’s problem does make sense.

Namely, Lekshmi loved taking naps on her veranda, and one afternoon she’d fallen asleep and when she woke up, she had a severe headache. She also felt sharp pains and a tingling sensation in her ear. Well, you guessed it – while Lekshmi was busy napping, the spider crawled by and decided that her ear would be a comfy place to lodge in.

Lekshmi said: “I was terrified as I could feel the movement of a creature in my ear. The acute earache followed by sharp pains suffocated me. I couldn’t think of anything and was petrified when the doctor confirmed the presence of a spider in my ear.”

Dr. Santosh Shivaswamy, Lekshmi’s doctor, said that it isn’t unusual to see people coming to him complaining of something stuck in their ear. However, it was uncommon to see a real spider living in someone’s ear.

Luckily, it all turned out well in the end. The doctors successfully forced the little arachnid out and Lekshmi got rid of her uninvited lodger.

Things in Life That Ruin Your Self-Confidence

A confident person, will, without a doubt go far in life. Why? Because they believe wholeheartedly in themselves. They’re sure of who they are and proud of it. They believe that no matter what the circumstances possess the ability to accomplish success.

Confidence is wrapped up in every aspect of life. It is the fuel that motivates a person to succeed. It’s the resilience that helps them overcome fear and anxieties. Someone with high confidence is almost certain to be a successful professional, spouse, and friend.

Unfortunately, many people suffer from low self-confidence. Due to certain experiences and circumstances, they develop a deep sense of fear and doubt about who they are and what they can accomplish. This kind of thinking seeps into every area of their lives.

Self-Confidence Drainers

There are many things in life that can bring a person to this point emotionally. Recognizing what these things are and eliminating them from your life, therefore, can help you to rebuild your self-confidence. Take a look below at some of the things that drain your self-confidence:

Lack of Foundation

Not everyone grows up in an ideal household where there’s strong family history, culture, values, and beliefs. Many people grow up not knowing much about who they truly are, where they come from, and how that makes them unique. Years of not knowing your roots can unknowingly eat away at your self-confidence.

Thanks to modern science and technology, finding out who you are, where you come from, and building a foundation for yourself is a lot easier. They have DNA test results that can pinpoint exactly where your bloodline started. Knowing this information can lead you on a quest of self-discovery which opens your eyes to your uniqueness and builds your self-confidence.

Social Media

The concept of comparing yourself to others, “coveting your neighbor’s wife”, and trying to “keep up with the Joneses” has been around for centuries. Yet, platforms like social media have taken this concept to an entirely different level. Now, everyone has instant access to the lives of others. Getting attention and competing for likes has become an addiction that slowly drains your self-confidence.

Social media is great for networking professionally and keeping in touch with friends and family, but it can also be dangerous for your self-confidence. It’s good to take a break from these platforms on occasion so you can live in the present and focus on your own life. When you stop caring so much about what’s going on in the lives of others and what people have to say about you, you can work towards feeling confident in yourself.

Limited Self-Care

Many people who suffer from low self-confidence fail to take care of themselves. They’re either too busy caring for the needs of others or they’ve brought themselves to believe that it’s not worth it. When you neglect your physical and emotional needs, it deteriorates your health, alters your appearance, and thus, lowers your self-esteem.

When you take care of yourself you feel more confident. Taking care of yourself doesn’t just mean eating right and exercising either. It means doing things that bring you joy, pursuing your dreams, reducing stress, taking breaks, and finding purpose. As you do these things for yourself you rely less on the actions and opinions of others and boost your self-confidence.

Self-Doubt

At the end of the day, the biggest self-confidence drainer is self-doubt. The mind is more powerful than you might imagine. When you don’t believe that you’re good enough, can accomplish things, or deserve happiness, ultimately you hold yourself back from the positives in life. You become heavily dependent upon others to lift you up and become dissatisfied and depressed about life.

As hard as it can be at times to get out of your head, it is vital to your overall well-being. You’ve got to turn that negative thinking into positive. Start keeping a gratitude journal, repeat positive affirmations throughout the day, and set small goals and celebrate once you’ve accomplished them.

Self-confidence has more of an impact in your life than you may realize. Without a high confidence level, everything in life becomes ten times more complicated. No matter what you’ve been through thus far, it’s never too late to start rebuilding your self-confidence and reclaiming your life. Simply start with the advice above and take it one day at a time. 

Pros and Cons of Knowing Your Baby’s Gender Before Birth

Guessing the gender of an unborn child has been a hallmark of human pregnancy for thousands of years. Will it be a boy or will it be a girl? Until recently, there was no way to know for certain. Expectant parents and others with an incentive to know could only sit back and speculate until the delivery date arrived.

Thanks to advances in technology, uncovering the gender of your baby before birth is a simple matter of having an ultrasound technician take a look. But just because you can doesn’t mean you have to; many parents opt to keep the gender of their baby a surprise until birth.

Which is right for you? Consider the following pros and cons of learning your baby’s gender before birth:

PRO: It provides a chance for celebration

Many parents choose to throw a gender reveal party for finding out whether their baby is a boy or a girl. This is a great opportunity to gather close friends and family members for a day or night of fun and festivities. The gender reveal celebration culminates with a color-coded visual cue signifying boy or girl. Blue means boy and pink means girl!

CON: It could lead to added anxiety

Some expectant parents report being suddenly struck by anxiety when learning the gender of their unborn baby. While not exactly giving a face to the child, knowing your baby is a boy or a girl establishes their identity in a way which is difficult to appreciate when gender is unknown. This can lead to a rush of emotions, some of which can prove to be too much for expectant parents.

PRO: It helps with planning

Learning the gender of your baby is more than just the novelty of finding out whether you’re having a boy or a girl. A gender reveal helps expectant parents plan for the future. From deciding how to decorate the baby’s room to what types of clothes to buy, the gender of your unborn baby will play a role in which choices are made.

CON: It can diminish the significance of birth

The joy of learning whether you’re having a boy or a girl is just the beginning. There remains plenty of work to be done once the blue or pink smoke bomb clears. Don’t make the mistake of taking the birthing process for granted; ensuring your boy or girl enters the world as healthy and happy as possible should remain a top priority. Gender Reveal Smoke Bombs offer you the opportunity to capture so many amazing gender reveal pictures that you will have forever.

PRO: It can help expectant parents connect to their unborn

As previously mentioned, it’s sometimes hard to feel an attachment to your unborn child in the early months of pregnancy. In many ways, they are an abstract concept in your head as much as a physical presence in development. Learning gender helps to make them more real, which in turn helps expectant parents feel more connected.

CON: It can set unrealistic expectations

It’s easy for expectant parents to develop expectations for their kids before they’re even born. Knowing their gender can accelerate these expectations, whether it’s hopes of exceptional athletic performance in the minds of men or women looking forward to raising a best friend. It’s important to keep these and other hopes and dreams at arm’s length in order to have an open mind regarding the relationship you’ll have with your child.

Once considered one of the greatest mysteries of nature, the gender of an unborn child is a relatively easy thing to know for parents who wish to learn. Such knowledge provides many benefits, but it can also lead to unintended consequences for some parents. Whether or not you wish to know your baby’s gender is a decision expectant parents make together, and one which will prove to be the first of many important choices they make as a team.