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Road Carnage: What Are the Top Causes of Car Accidents in the U.S?

By
Elizabeth Williams

Millions of car accidents happen in the U.S. every year. Why is this the case? Click here for the top causes of car accidents and what you can do to avoid them.

Road accidents and fatalities are slowly getting recognized as a public health concern. It has become a worldwide epidemic. Approximately 1.35 million people are killed yearly in road accidents. More than 50% of these victims are vulnerable road users such as cyclists and pedestrians.

Approximately 20 to 50 million more people suffer injury and disability as a result of road accidents. Road accidents cause significant economic losses to countries, continents, villages and even the most basic family level.

In America, there are more than 143 million daily commuters. In the year 2016, there were 34,439 fatal road accidents in the US alone. These road accidents caused the deaths of 37,461 individuals where 25,096 were vehicle occupants, 5,288 were motorcyclists and 7,079 were non-occupants.

The top causes of car accidents vary from country to country, there are, however, a few that are standard across the globe. As much as it may seem like wishful thinking, accidents, are indeed preventable. There somehow does not seem to be an end in sight to this epidemic. Here are the major causes of accidents on our roads.

Driving Under the Influence of Alcohol and Other Drugs

One of the top causes of accidents in the world is drunk driving. It is responsible for more crashes in North America than any other cause. Alcohol causes impaired judgment, poor decision-making reduced alertness on the road, reduced vision and drowsiness.

All these side effects combine to force the driver into an accident. Sometimes even one of the effects is enough. Pedestrians under the influence also have a hard time finding their balance as they walk. This causes them to stumble dangerously onto the road causing accidents.

In the year 2016, 10,497 people lost their lives as a result of drunk driving in the united states. More than a million others were arrested for getting behind the wheel under the influence of alcohol or narcotics. The bulk of these accidents occur at night when poor visibility also comes into play.

Marijuana is also a major contributor to the accident statistics as it increases the driver’s chances of crashing by 25%. These chances are however dependent on factors such as age and gender.

Measures such as mass media campaigns, administrative license revocation laws, ignition interlocks, sobriety checkpoints and many others, have been taken in order to reduce or completely wipe out driving under the influence in the U.S. if you have been a victim of an accident due to drunk driving, reach out to a car wreck lawyer to help you in your pursuit of justice.

Distracted driving

When driving, the driver has to pay complete attention to whatever is around them on the road. A lot of drivers get distracted turning their attention to factors either inside the car or on their sides. Traveling at such high speeds, this is courting death.

Cell phone use is currently the leading cause of distraction behind the wheel. Younger generations are particularly victims of cell phone distraction while driving. From texting while driving to logging into social media to video calling, the smartphone era has definitely come with its cons. Other devices such as GPS, radio and air conditioners also contribute to this.

Arguing with a passenger or during episodes of road rage with another driver, rubbernecking at sights beside the road or just simply daydreaming all fall under this category.

Trying to divide your attention in order to handle other tasks while driving reduces your reaction time and alertness on the road. A few seconds is all it takes to reply that text, but it’s also all it takes to get into a life-changing or fatal accident.

Texting while driving is declared illegal in many states in the U.S. the government and other well-wishers also conduct mass media campaigns against this growing epidemic.

Reckless Driving

Driving too aggressively, tailgating, swerving and abruptly changing lanes. All these are examples of reckless driving. Reckless driving not only reduces the time the driver will take to recognize potential danger on the road, but it also puts fellow drivers on edge.

Hazards pop out on the roads all the time, it takes seconds for a driver to recognize the danger, make a decision on the next course of action and then execute it. Sometimes, the best thing to do is to apply emergency brakes instead of swerving onto the adjacent lanes.

If there was a tailgating driver or one who changed lanes too fast without looking fast, a rear end accident occurs. It is for this reason that states incorporate theoretical knowledge in their driving schools. This knowledge, among many other safety measures to know, consists of the stipulated safe distances to drive behind the car in front.

Speeding is also an example of reckless driving. There is a reason that speed limits and speed bumps are erected on the roads. There are maximum speed limits and minimums on all the roads depending on its type and the general area around the road.

Bad Weather

Rain comes with reduced visibility on the roads. With poor visibility, it takes more time just to see and recognize a hazard on the road. This, in turn, reduces the amount of time a driver has to react to the danger. A lot of rear-end accidents happen during rainy periods.

Snow also reduces visibility and increases the slipperiness of the road. Tires have less contact with the tarmac and therefore less grip. This causes the car to slide, reducing the driver to a passenger behind his own wheel.

Poor visibility and slippery roads are some of the top contributors to accidents where cars drove into a tree or drove off a cliff in extreme cases. Speeding during bad weather conditions is almost a death sentence.

How You Can Avoid These Top Causes of Accidents

Human factors such as negligence and recklessness are some of the top causes of accidents. A small factor such as regularly checking your car can make the difference on the road. Although it might seem unrealistic to aim for zero road related accidents, one less accident is definitely worth the effort.

Careful driving, obeying road rules, avoiding distractions, getting off the wheel when distracted and parking the car safely during bad weather, are all decisions we have to make for our own safety and that of other road users. Make a safe decision, it is always the best decision. Be sure to check out our page for more tips on staying safe, healthy and much more.

10 Telltale Signs You Could Be On The Verge Of Having A Mental Breakdown

By
Riley Cooper

Do you ever feel like secluding yourself in a quiet, dark room and screaming the dissatisfaction and resentment out of your lungs? Do you ever feel like flying off the handle if your co-worker makes a sarcastic or negative comment about you? Or do you ever feel like storming out of your office in the middle of a meeting since you simply can’t take it anymore?

Well, if you answered all of the questions with a yes, chances are that you could be heading for a serious mental breakdown. The mental breakdown definition is a result of a protracted period of accumulative stress, anxiety, and depression.

What you should know is that regardless of how good you are at tolerating and handling the symptoms of a mental breakdown, if you don’t practice self-care and find a way to release the pressure and get the rest you need, mental breakdown can negatively affect your overall health as well as the quality of your life.

Here are 10 telltale signs that you could be on the verge of having a mental breakdown:

1. You’ve been experiencing frequent, radical mood swings.

You are feeling great one minute, and the smallest, least important thing can make you lose your temper and lash out at whoever is near you the next. Although you normally have no problem controlling the way you react, lately you’ve been having a hard time doing this because you feel like everyone and everything around you gets on your nerves.  

2. You’ve been isolating yourself from everyone.

You are an outgoing person and you enjoy hanging out with your friends and family, but lately, you’ve been avoiding seeing them. Perhaps the reason for this is that you don’t have a lot of free time or perhaps you don’t want them to find out about what you’re going through. Whatever the reason is, you’ve been doing your best to avoid seeing them lately.

3. You’re feeling very confused.

Your mind feels cloudy. You keep making mistakes at work because you find it extremely hard to concentrate. You often can’t remember where you put your phone last. Your mind keeps wandering off while others are talking to you. Sometimes you even think that you’ve heard or seen something which is not there. You feel like you’re no longer in control of what goes on in your life.

4. You feel numb.

Some moments you feel upset, anxious, or sad and other moments you just don’t feel anything. You feel numb. You lose interest in the things you generally enjoy doing and sometimes you even don’t care about the way you look.

5. You’ve been trying to distract yourself in every way you can.

In order to escape from your reality, you’ve been spending most of your time watching movies, reading books, and playing computer games lately. Doing these things helps you clear your mind of unwanted, negative thoughts and stay focused both at home and work.

6. You’ve been experiencing health issues.

You’ve been feeling so stressed out, anxious, and bitter lately that all this has started negatively affecting your physical health. A rapid heartbeat, stomachaches, and headaches have become your everyday issues.

7. You’ve lost hope for a better future.

Negative thoughts are beginning to overpower your positive thoughts. You’ve been feeling so disappointed, bitter, and hopeless lately that you feel like you’re stuck in a dark, bottomless hole and you can’t find the way out. What’s even worse, you feel like there’s no point in looking for it.

8. You’ve gotten into bad habits.

You’ve fallen into self-destructive habits and you find it really hard to break yourself of them. You’ve started smoking and drinking alcohol more. You’ve also been wasting a lot of money on expensive, unnecessary things.

The problem with this is that you don’t consider these habits bad, instead, you see them as a way which helps you manage your stress more easily.

9. You’ve got so much to take care of that you’ve started procrastinating.

All the stress you’ve been experiencing lately has sucked all the energy out of you and left you feeling mentally and physically exhausted. As a result, doing your chores and taking care of your responsibilities at work is extremely hard for you. You don’t know what to do first and what last.

Planning and organizing your daily activities is so difficult and exhausting for you that procrastination has become something you practice every day.

10. You’ve been struggling with dark thoughts.

Your mind has been so swarmed with dark, negative thoughts lately that you often feel hopeless. Besides being unproductive at work, you feel like you don’t have the energy to do even basic things, such as hanging out with your friends and family.

Should you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected]            

6 Main Characteristics That Most Toxic People Have In Common

By
Stephanie Reeds

Toxic individuals are scavengers in human form. These people exist to make life a living hell for other human beings. They feed off our energy by draining both our emotional and your physical strength.

The scariest part is that most of the time, some of us don’t even notice that we are being manipulated until it’s too late. That is how devious and dangerous toxic individuals are.

If you are reading this, then you’ve probably already been through the hell of living with one. But if you haven’t, here are 6 main characteristics that most toxic people have in common that will help you recognize them very easily:

1. THEY DON’T LIKE SAYING ‘I AM SORRY’

The first thing you need to know about toxic, manipulative individuals is that they are always right. You and I may not understand that, but in their eyes, they are never wrong.

You can explain your reasons for one whole hour, but they won’t bother to listen. You can expect an honest and heartfelt “I’m sorry”, but the reality is, you are never going to get it. Because these people don’t apologize.

2. THEY JUDGE PEOPLE

These people are probably the most judgmental creatures that ever walked the Earth. If you’ve met one, then you already know. The thing about them is, they have a buttload of insecurities and repressed emotions inside of them.

So, in order to avoid opening that box but still release the anger inside of them, they judge others. They notice everything about other people because deep down they possess those same traits.

3. THEY DON’T TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THEIR EMOTIONS AND ACTIONS

Instead of owning up to their mistakes or picking up on how they actually are feeling, toxic individuals, tend to blame others for everything and project their feelings onto other people.

That is their own sick and twisted defense mechanism that helps them avoid reality and continue living inside their bubble of lies.

4. THEY ARE VICIOUS AND MANIPULATIVE

The main purpose of their lives is to get what they want. So, if something doesn’t go according to their plan, they do everything in their power to make their wishes come true. In most cases, this means manipulating other people to achieve their goals. You may find this inconsiderate and horrible, but they don’t. Other people’s needs are not important to them. They only care about their own.

5. THEY HAVE AN UNPREDICTABLE NATURE

No matter how hard you try to really understand their weird nature, you simply cannot. Toxic people are very hard to keep up with. This is due to their inconsistency, mood swings, terrible, unstable behavior and the masks that they usually wear to trick other people.

6. THEY FORCE PEOPLE TO DOUBT THEMSELVES

One of their greatest skills has got to be making people feel like they are worthless. If you’ve been friends with these people or even spoke with them for an hour, you are probably familiar with the feeling of being completely doubtful of your own actions.

Well, these people can do that to you. That is how they trick people into being with them. They lure them with their charm, but after a certain time, they start treating them like trash. They humiliate them, they take away their last bits of self-confidence and then they turn them into human beings who no longer feel capable of achieving something.

This article is written by Stephanie Reeds. If you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected] and I will be happy to give you my opinion.

8 Clear Signs That You Were Destined To End Up With Your First Love

By
Riley Cooper

It’s not easy to forget the person that won your love first. It’s hard to forget the person who entered your heart first, and if you are truly honest with yourself, most likely is still in it.

Irrespective of whether or not you and he/she ended your relationship kindly, calmly, and respectfully, your first love is most probably someone you think about or maybe even dream of till this day.

I know that admitting such a thing to yourself is not easy, but if you’re still thinking about your first love and wondering if you two are done with your love forever, here are 8 telltale signs that you were destined to end up with them:

1. They occupy your mind when you are with your current partner.

If you’re in a relationship with someone, but still thinking about your first love and reviving memories of the time you spent together, this signals that you still haven’t liberated yourself from your past.

Dwelling on your past is easy when you aren’t satisfied with your present life, yet, if your past is still haunting you even when you’re satisfied with the present, chances are that you are not done with your past yet.

2. You still feel something about them.

Does your heart still beat like crazy when you think about them? Do you often find yourself longing for their touch? Do you feel ready to get back together with them every time you bump into them in the street by chance?

Well, if you answered all of the questions with a yes, then know that things aren’t over for you yet. And what you should do next is try to find out if your first love still feels about you the way you feel about them.

3. You can still have open communication with each other.

If you still feel free to talk with each other openly about anything, then this is a sure sign that you still feel comfortable in each other’s presence. This is very important if you’re thinking about getting back together with them.

By freely and honestly communicating with each other, you can easily overcome all the problems you failed to solve the first time.

4. The connection between you has not disappeared.

Perhaps it’s been years since you broke up and both of you have headed in different directions, but the connection between you hasn’t lost its strength yet. If you can tell that you still respect and care about each other, then this really proves that there are some bonds that neither time nor distance can break.

5. You’ve stayed in touch after you broke up.

People that are destined to be in your life will always find a way to stay there. So, if you and the person who entered your heart first are still communicating or hanging out with each other like two close friends, well, that’s a telltale sign that you were destined to end up together.

6. Being in their presence feels natural.

You feel as comfortable and at ease in their company as you felt when you dated. You still look at each other’s eyes with warmth and affection. You still give each other compliments and tell each other jokes and laugh until your stomach hurts. You feel nice and lively when you’re together. You feel like nothing has changed.

7. Your intuition tells you that you were meant for each other.

If you always believe what your gut feeling tells you and let your intuition guide you through life, then you can say goodbye to all your doubts about whether you were destined to be together with your first love. Your intuition has the answer.

8. You have always known that your love story was never finished.

If you and your first love ended your relationship since it was not the right place or time, then chances are that you feel like your thing is not over yet. Well, if this is how you feel, you are left with two options:

a) Get back together

b) End what you started for good.

What’s going to be your choice?

Should you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected]    

 

Stop Waiting For People To Make You Happy And Look For That Happiness Within You

By
Stephanie Reeds

Let me tell you a story.

I am a person who has struggled with relationships my whole life. Ever since I can remember, I’ve always been the who was left out. I was always the loner. For some reason, I had a hard time fitting in. So, considering that this was my greatest wish, you can only imagine how hard it was for me.

I just wanted people to like me, you know?

High school was pretty much the same, if not even worse. For me, it was the epitome of hell. I had a period in my life when people bullied me. And just like everything else, that also stopped at some point. But I was never a part of something big. I was never a part of a group of people, or let’s say the popular ones in the class. I am utterly ashamed of classifying people in such groups, but we all know how shallow and desperate the mind of a teenager sometimes is.

All I know is that I wanted to stop feeling like that. I wanted to wake up into a world where I am not an outcast and people actually love me. I just wanted to be accepted for who I am.

Luckily, that time has passed, and I grew up. Today I am much stronger as a person, much wiser and much more mature. Those painful years of my life were really hard on me. I can honestly say that if it weren’t for a few, amazing people that arrived into my life at that exact moment (you know who you are), I probably wouldn’t have made it…

But you know what? Those horrible years of my life opened my eyes. After so much time and energy spent on getting people to like me, I finally asked myself, “But what about what I genuinely want? Do I even like these people? Or is it the sheer loneliness that makes me crave the presence of others that much?”

The thing is, life is short enough as it is. I know that this is the biggest cliché that you’ve ever heard, but it is the truth. So, tell me. Why are we so damn eager to spend it looking for our happiness in other people?  Why are we so obsessed with forcing people to love us? Why can’t we just let go and live our lives?

Your happiness and your will to live can only be found inside your heart. The people that we spend most of our time with, the ones that come into our lives and leave a certain mark on our heart, whether they’re friends, family, partners or colleagues, they shape us as we grow. They become a part of us. That’s a given. But regardless of their influence on us, we are the only ones who can build ourselves up or knock ourselves down.

We are the ones who have that power. And not only power but also a responsibility.

You have to understand that people will always find a way to be mean and hurt you. That is a part of our damned nature. It is up to you whether you will accept that kind of life or you will finally acknowledge your worth and keep moving on your own.

Stop waiting for people to make you happy and try to find that happiness within you. It’s no one’s responsibility to fix you or change the things that you don’t like about yourself. It’s only yours. Plus the clock is ticking away. If you don’t do it today, you may not have tomorrow.

Release yourself from that victim mentality and realize that you don’t need others to be happy. You are not miserable because people reject you. You are not angry because no one likes you. You are not sad because others don’t care about you. You are miserable because you don’t accept yourself for who you are. You are angry because you don’t love yourself. You are sad because you don’t bother to take care of your wellbeing.

So, let’s change that today, shall we?

This article is written by Stephanie Reeds. If you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected] and I will be happy to give you my opinion.

6 Things You’ll Experience When You Meet A Good, Honest Man After Dating A Narcissist

By
Riley Cooper

Being in a relationship with a narcissist is hard and painful, but breaking free from that prison is even harder and more painful.

Narcissistic individuals are incapable of building meaningful, harmonious, happy, healthy relationships. When you’re in a narcissistic relationship, you’re dating someone who doesn’t treat you like a priority, but an option.

You’re dating someone who always puts his feelings, needs, desires, and problems before your own. You’re dating someone who considers himself smarter, better, and superior to you, which causes you to gradually lose your sense of self-respect and self-worth.

When you’re in a narcissistic relationship, your main role is to boost your partner’s ego, flatter him, and always make him the center of attention since it is all about him and the way he wants to feel and never about you.

When you’re in a narcissistic relationship, you get used to being disrespected, criticized, and manipulated, and the bad thing is that you don’t do anything to change this until things get out of control.

When you finally pluck up the courage to break free from the relationship and let go of the narcissist, another obstacle is thrown your way. You meet a nice man who gives you all the attention, respect, and affection you deserve, but it’s very difficult for you to trust him and give in.

This man will be a complete opposite to your narcissistic ex-partner and here are 6 things you’ll experience when you meet him:

1. He’ll want you to trust him.

He’ll know that your trust was broken time and time again in your last relationship. He’ll know that you were in a relationship in which you were always given empty promises and lame excuses. He’ll know that your narcissistic a**hole of an ex manipulated you and lied to you many times.

But, this man will never treat you this way. Instead, he’ll treat you with kindness, compassion, dignity, and love. He’ll be patient with you. He won’t rush you or expect you to do things you don’t want to. He’ll prove that he deserves your trust.

2. He’ll know your worth.

Unlike the narcissist that didn’t believe in you and never encouraged you to pursue your goals and follow your dreams and passions, this man will believe in you and know your worth. With his words and actions, he’ll inspire you to set high goals and never stop chasing your dreams. He’ll believe that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to.

And most importantly, he’ll make sure you’re always aware of your qualities and strength yourself.

3. He’ll attentively listen to you.

Unlike your manipulative, egotistic narcissistic ex who never showed interest in your opinions, ideas, and beliefs, this man will show you that your words have a meaning for him.

He’ll attentively listen to you when you want to tell him how you spent your day, but also when you want to vent about your problems or complain about your jealous co-worker. He’ll show that your opinions and problems mean to him.

4. He will apologize.

In your last relationship, you rarely, not to say never, heard the phrase, “I’m sorry.” Because whatever went wrong between you and your narcissistic ex, it was always your fault-never his. He never admitted his mistakes and wrongdoings.

But this man won’t be ashamed or afraid to take responsibility for his actions. He won’t blame you for your relationship problems and arguments. And most importantly, if he does something that might hurt your feelings, he’ll apologize to you for it and make sure he corrects his mistake and make it up to you.  

5. He’ll be thoughtful, gentle, and loving.

In your last relationship, you were the one who had to plan all your dates, birthday parties, and holidays. You were the one that had to keep the spark between you alive and make your relationship exciting.

But, things will be different with this man because you’ll do all of this together. This man will be willing to do all those little and seemingly unimportant things that actually mean a lot. He’ll leave you cute love notes on your bed in the morning so that you can start your day knowing how loved you are.

He’ll send flowers to you at work so that you know that he’s always thinking about you. This man will shower you with sweet words and affection.

6. He’ll teach you what real love is.

Unlike your narcissistic ex who made you believe that love is hard and painful, this man will show you the opposite – that loving and being loved by someone is one of the most amazing and fulfilling experiences one can ever have.

He’ll show you that genuine, honest people are real and he’ll help you start believing in love again. He’ll make you feel like you’re the most cherished and important person in the world. And most importantly, he’ll be the person who will make sure you always love yourself.

Should you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected]  

6 Things A Narcissist Will Never Do

By
Riley Cooper

Does anyone around you always act like they know everything? Do they consider themselves smarter, more attractive, and more successful than everyone else? Do their conversations always start with ‘I,’ ‘me,’ and ‘my?’ Well, if your answer is yes, then this is an obvious sign that you have a narcissistic person at hand.

Narcissistic individuals are the most self-absorbed, conceited human beings that exist on planet Earth. These people simply defy logic and social norms and values don’t apply to them. They live their lives following their own rules and manipulations.

Therefore, never think that you know them. Narcissistic individuals have many disguises behind which they hide their true colors. Narcissists are ready to do anything to make themselves look and feel smarter, more beautiful, and better than everyone else and they don’t care whether they’ll hurt your feelings in the process.

However, there are certain things that narcissists will never do.

Here they are:

1. Listen to you.

A narcissist is not the type of person you go to when you want to vent about your problems. They’ll look at your eyes and act like they’re paying careful attention to every word you’re telling them, but the truth is that they’re not listening to you at all.

A narcissist will listen to you only when they want to take advantage of you, using your problems, insecurities, and fears to get what they need from you.

2. Show compassion and empathy.

Narcissists are incapable of empathy and compassion. These are just abstract terms for them. You could be going through a very difficult period in your life and struggling with problems or emotional pain, but they’ll never show you compassion or show interest in your problems. And if they’re compassionate or offer to help you solve some problem of yours, it’ll only be for showing other people what they did for you.

3. Apologize.

Narcissists never take responsibility for their mistakes and wrongdoings. They will criticize you, belittle you, lie to you, and hurt your feelings time and time again, but they’ll never admit to it. Whatever goes wrong between you two, it’s never their fault – they never make mistakes. They are always right. They’re simply flawless.

Therefore, know that no matter how many times they hurt you with their words and actions, you’ll never hear them say: “I’m sorry.”

4. Do you a favor for free.

A narcissist will never do you a favor unless it benefits them. If you ask them for help, they’ll agree to help you but not because they’re kind and generous but because this will help them get what they want from you. They’ll never do anything for you for free. They’ll always expect you to return the favor.

5. Express gratitude.

The phrase “Thank you” doesn’t exist in the vocabulary of narcissists. You can be good to them and put their needs, wishes, and problems before your own time and time again, but they’ll never appreciate it. They simply feel entitled to special treatment.

6. Express their feelings.

Never expect a narcissistic individual to show you the true, uncensored side of their character. These people wear different masks – each carefully suited to every occasion. They’d never show you their state of mind and how they feel inside.

Should you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected]  

5 Ways Mentally Strong People Deal With Life’s Challenges

By
Stephanie Reeds

Everything we go through in life, everything we choose to do, or not to do while we are here on Earth pretty much depends on our attitude towards life. In a nutshell, on our determination and our mental strength.

I am not saying that there aren’t other important circumstances that dictate our journey. I just think that regardless of those external factors, we actually do have control over our lives. The truth is, life happens regardless of whether we like it or not. We decide how we respond to it. That’s what actually matters the most.

With that being said, I believe that mental strength is one of the best assets a person can possess today. Mentally strong people are some of the happiest and wisest people that walk the Earth. Here’s why:

1. They don’t waste their time complaining about their lives. They are not the kind of people who enjoy having a victim identity. In fact, if there’s anything in the world that they hate the most, that is the victim mentality in people. Instead of sitting on their asses and whining about a problem, they face the issues and focus on finding the best solutions.

Mentally strong people have been through many things in life to finally learn that difficulties are a part of life. They’ve faced many obstacles to finally realize that all of these challenges push us, shape us into wiser beings and teach us the most important lessons about life. That is why they’ve chosen to always go with the flow.

2. They accept everything that life faces them with, and they learn from their experiences. These amazing human beings are aware that no matter what we do, life will never come with an instruction manual. That is why mentally strong people are never surprised. They don’t live their lives with their expectations up in the clouds. They focus on the present moment, appreciate everything that life gives them, search for the purpose of their experiences and learn to dance in the rain.

Where everyone else sees an obstacle, mentally strong people see a challenge.

3. They have control over their lives. Mentally strong people like to be on top of things. They are aware that they cannot always be in control of everything that happens in their lives, but still, that never stops them from being organized and responsible human beings.

These people don’t waste their time and energy waiting for something to fall off the sky. They get up and work hard for it. They get things done, they take responsibility for their actions and they suffer the consequences on their own. Mentally strong people don’t expect people to save them. They save themselves.

4. They always stand their ground even if that means standing alone. This means saying NO when it’s a clear NO. Holding on to their beliefs even when the whole world is up against them. Expressing their opinions when they are completely different than everyone else’s. Creating boundaries and building up walls to protect their world.

Mentally strong people have respect for themselves and they would never let another human being treat them like they are nobody.

5. They let go of everything that simply doesn’t help them grow. Mentally strong people know that the only way for them to create their best life and find their happiness is by first getting rid of the toxicity around them. Whether that’s a negative influence from a friend, a toxic partner, or an unhealthy lifestyle, mentally strong people distance themselves from everything that pushes them down.

At the end of the day, who we are is pretty much determined by everything that we do in life. So, who are you?

This article is written by Stephanie Reeds. If you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected] and I will be happy to give you my opinion.

Emotional Intelligence: The Secret To Thriving Relationships

By
Elizabeth Williams

When we talk about what makes a person likeable, some of the first words that come to mind include kindness, empathy, and compassion – all traits that indicate that they’re in tune with other’s emotions. And while we tend to think of these simply as positive personal attributes, experts describe it differently; individuals who demonstrate these skills are more likely to have a high emotional intelligence quotient (EQ). Rooted in self-awareness, EQ is a way of describing how someone identifies, understands, and handles emotions, and those with a higher EQ are more likely to have healthy personal and professional relationships.

Intimacy And EQ

One of the relationships that benefits most from emotional intelligence are our romantic ones, whether we’re just starting to date someone new or been married for years. In these close relationships, it’s easy to take out our own emotional frustrations on our partner or to become emotionally unavailable when stressed. These actions are those of someone who isn’t in touch with their emotions, who can’t manage them in a healthy way, and who even uses emotions as a barrier to closeness. But there are a number of simple steps we can take to improve EQ.

In Positive Psychology’s Emotional Intelligence Masterclass, teachers focus helping participants grow into emotional awareness, a skill that can be summed up as knowing what you’re feeling at any given moment. Participants also learn how to balance their emotions with rational knowledge, to better navigate tense situations. Many therapists use a similar approach – known in dialectical behavioral therapy as “Wise Mind” – to help people improve their relationships through emotional regulation.

Emotions In The Workplace

It’s not just our personal lives that benefit from enhanced EQ – our professional relationships are also more likely to thrive with better emotional management and insight. For example, high EQ professionals are better listeners. That’s because they know how to pay attention to what others are saying, reflect on those words and observe their own emotions, and then respond thoughtfully. This is active listening taken to the next level, and while all professionals can benefit from these skills, managers have the most to gain.

One of the key reasons that managers should focus on EQ development is that those with high EQ are able to set ego aside and work well with others. They know how to give praise and apologize, how to encourage and acknowledge. Most importantly, they are able to do this in a genuine way, rather than by rote. It’s so easy for managers and C-suite level professionals to end up in a bubble where their opinions are all that matters because they’re in charge, but leaders with a high EQ know how to stay humble.

Tuning In To You

The best thing about focusing on EQ as a growth area is that it yields benefits in all areas of life. Those with a high EQ can enter into conflict without escalating, can identify unproductive behavior patterns, and can walk away from situations that are at risk of spinning out of control. Most of all, EQ encourages a mindset that allows you to respond to your feelings, and to a given situation, rather than react to it. Too many adults don’t know the difference between these two approaches, but responses are considered and contextualized while reactions are impulsive.

Most of us grow in emotional intelligence as we age, but we can all make an effort to be more in tune with our own emotions, and those of others, even in the tensest situations. Once you begin to make that shift, you’ll notice an amazing difference in your emotional health and in. your relationships. It’s all about stepping into a different mental frame.

When It’s Time to Go: Relationship Habits That You Don’t Realize are Toxic

By
Elizabeth Williams

Have you ever heard the expression “love is blind?” Well, if you haven’t, the expression is talking about how when you’re in love with someone, you can be blind to their faults even when their faults are taken out on you. When your love is blind for your significant other, it usually takes someone else to let you know that you’re in a toxic relationship because you just can’t see it being that you’re the one in the relationship.

Psychology Today states that it’s common for people to be so blinded to their partner’s negative traits that they actually create an idealized image of their partner and it’s the idealized version of their partner that they see, instead of the real version of them.

To be fair though, you really can’t blame you’re significant other for displaying these habits because there isn’t a class you take in high school or college that teaches you how to be the ideal boyfriend or girlfriend. Yes, you learn about the fundamentals of sex and the anatomy of the body but there’s no real class that teaches you about relationships… ultimately you learn through trial and error.

Better to Find Out Now Than Later

When you’re in a toxic relationship, there are always red flags that signal you to leave but you either ignore them or you really don’t see them. The thing about red flags is that you want to catch them and do something about them before you get too far in the relationship and both people suffer.

This situation happens all the time, actually. Can you imagine getting so entangled in your relationship (despite the red flags), get engaged, and then get married? Next thing you know, you’re in an unhappy marriage and the only solution is to seek legal counseling. You don’t want to go through that… that’s why it’s better to pay attention to your significant other’s habits and any red flags they may signal to let you know that your relationship is toxic and you need to leave.

You or Your Partner Constantly “Keeps Score”

“Keeping score” in a relationship is when one or both of you are consistently bringing up each other’s past mistakes in the relationship. You’re pretty much starting a battle or competition with each other to see who has made the most mistakes in the relationship, turning the whole situation into a “scorecard.” The aspect about this that actually makes the relationship toxic is that you/your partner tries to use this scorecard to justify certain actions or behaviors.

This is something you want to nip in the bud as soon as you notice your partner doing this, or if you notice the both of you doing it. If you don’t, then you and your partner will end up spending your whole relationship trying to prove to each other that one person is more righteous than the other. This will base your entire relationship on guilt and bitterness, and there’s no happiness in that.

Your Partner Expects You to Be a Mind Reader

You’ve heard people say “say what you mean and mean what you say.” In a relationship, it’s very important to apply that statement. Your partner may have a desire, want, need, or thought but doesn’t verbally express what they want. Instead, they drop little hints or express passive-aggressive behaviors in hopes that you’ll know exactly what they want… no one is a mind reader so your partner can’t be mad at you if you don’t know exactly what they want when they don’t tell you what it is.

The aspect about this that makes it toxic is it clearly shows that you two aren’t comfortable with openly communicating with each other. If your partner is happy and feels secure in the relationship, they wouldn’t need to drop hints or expect you to know what they want without telling you what they want.

Your Partner Threatens the Future of the Relationship

Let’s say that you’ve had a bad day and your partner clearly sees that you’re upset and makes a statement saying “If you’re going to be negative like this all the time, then I can’t be with you.” A statement like that is so unnecessary. The aspect that makes it so toxic is that it’s a mind game.

Relationships are going to have ups and downs and the fact that they’re so quick to threaten to throw it away because something doesn’t go right or go their way is a major red flag that you’re in a toxic relationship and you need to get out of it.

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