We all wonder why it is so damn hard to maintain a decent relationship nowadays and keep that spark alive, but on the other side, nobody is doing their own part. Nobody really cares about taking responsibility for this whole issue or simply think about it at all.

We are always waiting for the other person to make the move. 

Because that’s the easier way.And that my friends is the reason why most of our relationships and marriages nowadays fall apart.

We expect our partners to make us happy. Yes, that’s right.

We feel miserable, insecure and alone. We are unsatisfied with our lives and we get into relationships thinking that being with another person will eventually add real value to our life. We lie to ourselves that being loved by someone will bring us the happiness that we desperately need.

And eventually, we realize the truth.

Happiness is something that can only be found within us.

You can have the most loving and amazing person for a partner, but if you aren’t happy with yourself first, you will never be happy with them. That’s just the way it goes.

We all have our own baggage that we carry. But even though our loved ones will always be there to help us with it, we are the only ones responsible for dealing with it.   

It’s not their fault that you hate yourself. It is not their fault that you are not happy with the way your life is. It is not their fault that you are feeling lost and confused. That’s on you. You are the one responsible for the course of your life.

Your partner is not supposed to fix you or make you love yourself. You are the one who has to find a way to do that.

Finding peace and happiness within yourself is one of the most important things that you will ever have to do in your life. That whole process is meant to be a solo journey. Because that is the only way you will ever learn to truly love and appreciate yourself.

Being with the right person won’t help you love yourself if you haven’t already learned that on your own. It won’t quiet down your insecurities and it won’t calm your fears.

If you aren’t happy with yourself, you won’t be happy with your relationship.

You will notice that no matter how much you try to ignore your issues, there will be moments when they resurface. You will catch yourself acting overly emotional, jealous and irrational. You will catch yourself wondering whether they really love you or not. You will catch yourself being paranoid about them leaving you. You will catch yourself creating unnecessary drama and tension.

You will catch yourself destroying your relationship.

That is why I need you to promise yourself that you are going to start treating yourself better. Your mental and emotional health is something that only you can work on. Loving yourself before loving anyone else is something you must do before falling in love.

That is why it is so important to take care of your own issues before starting a life with another person.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how many times your partner tells you that they love you. If your insecurities inside of you make you doubt everything, that is your own problem, not theirs.

Always remember. It is only when you learn to accept and love yourself the way you are that you’ll find it easier to accept the love from everyone around you.

It’s time for me to start a new chapter of my life. It’s time for me to make the most important decision in my life. It’s time for me to let go of you.

Yes, I am letting go of you.

But, you know what?

I’m not letting go of you because I want to get my revenge on you or because I want to be the first one to leave this relationship.

I’m cutting you out of my life since you no longer deserve my love.

You don’t deserve all of the time, energy, and effort I’ve been investing in our relationship since the day we started dating. You don’t deserve all of the tears I’ve shed for you. You don’t deserve the sweet, comforting words I tell you so as to cheer you up when you feel worried or sad or when you have a hard day at work.

You don’t deserve all those romantic things I do so as to keep our relationship always exciting.

I am letting go of you, but not because I no longer love you – my love for you has always been genuine and pure, but because you squandered all of the chances I gave you. Because you didn’t bother to appreciate all the times I forgave you for your mistakes. Because you didn’t fulfill your promise to change.

I am letting go of you because I can no longer make excuses for your empty promises and pathetic excuses. I can no longer put up with and justify your mistakes, lies, and hurtful words.

I am letting go of you because you don’t deserve my kindness, my compassion, my patience.

You see, I tried really hard. I did my best to make you happy. I did my best to help you pursue your goals and dreams. I did my best to help you grow and become a better version of yourself. I did my best to make our relationship work.  

And what did I get in return?

Blame games, broken promises, lies, disappointment, confusion, and sadness.

Yes, this is what I’ve received for loving you, and I am tired of it.

I’m tired of trying hard to save our relationship. I’m tired of waiting for you to look at me the way I look at you- with eyes full of warmth and affection. I’m tired of waiting for you to love me the way I love you.

I’ve lost track of myself. Because I’ve always prioritized your feelings, needs, and wishes over mine.

I’ve lost track of myself because I loved you from the bottom of my heart. Because I loved you deeply, passionately, selflessly, and unconditionally. Because I loved you for who you were. I loved every part of you, including your flaws and imperfections.

I still carry that love in me, you know?

But I can no longer let my love for you steal my happiness, drain my energy, and ruin my dreams. That’s not what I deserve.

Therefore, I’m letting go of you. It’s time to start loving and respecting myself for a change. It’s time to allow myself to search for my happiness and true love somewhere else.

Let me ask you something: Are you dating a man that’s chasing after multiple women at a time and perceives himself as a real “stud” because of that? Well, if you’ve answered the question with a yes, there’s one thing you should know: You’ve fallen in love with the wrong man!

Because a man that chases after different women at the same time is not an honest and good man. He’s not the type of person who is interested in being in a serious relationship. He’s not the type of man who would commit to only one woman. He is just a lustful and egotistical loser that has no regard for his partner’s feelings and needs. And undeniably, he isn’t a real man.

Since a real man knows that when one is truly in love, they commit to just one person. They give their soul, heart, and body to just one person.

A real man is aware that finding true, honest, and deep love is difficult and that when one ultimately finds this kind of love, they need to do their best to nurture it and protect it so that it lasts forever.

A real man doesn’t believe in the concept of “perfect woman.” Because he understands that no one is perfect. He understands that we all have flaws.

A real man is aware of your whims, annoying habits, insecurities, and fears, but this doesn’t change his feelings for you. Because he knows that your weaknesses and imperfections don’t define who you are. He understands that they don’t decrease your value. He knows they’re just a tiny part of you and the reason why you’re perfect to him.

A real man sticks with you through thick and thin. He doesn’t leave you to deal with your problems alone. Instead, he’s there for you when you need him most. He does his best to help you solve your problems, ease your worries, and alleviate your pain. He makes sure you know that you can always rely on him for support.

A real man fights for your happiness. He’s not afraid to sacrifice his own needs and desires and step out of his comfort zone if he knows that this can contribute to your happiness. He puts a smile on your face when you’re down in the dumps since nothing makes him sadder than when he notices you are worried or hurt.

A real man makes sure you know how much you mean to him. He lets you know that you occupy a special place in his heart. He lets you know how grateful he is for having you in his life. He expresses his feelings for you openly and proudly. He tries to connect with you on every level.

A real man values honesty the most. He doesn’t play mind games with you. He doesn’t manipulate you emotionally. He doesn’t feed your hopes with hollow promises and grandiose stories. He doesn’t beat around the bush. Instead, he tells it like it is. He tells you the truth no matter how cruel or painful it might be.

A real man knows your worth. He believes in you. He believes you can achieve anything you set your mind to. He encourages you to pursue high goals. He inspires you to grow and become better with each passing day.

A real man is not afraid to commit to you. He’s not afraid to dedicate his heart, mind, and soul to you. He’s not afraid to spend the rest of his life with you. The only thing he’s afraid of is losing you.

I’m the type of person that loves honestly, unconditionally, and deeply. I’m not someone that settles for casual things. Someone that is interested in playing games. Someone that settles for mediocre or one-sided relationships.

The only type of relationship that I want is one in which I’ll never have to doubt my partner’s feelings for me. One in which I’ll know that my love is reciprocated. One in which I’ll be treated the way I deserve to be treated. One in which I’ll never have to deal with mind games and mediocre love.

You see, when it comes to love and relationships, for me, it is very simple: You either want to be with me or you don’t. This is not difficult to understand, is it?

The truth is that when you are truly and profoundly in love with someone, you don’t string them along. You don’t play that childish, irritating hard-to-get game. You don’t make them pursue you. You don’t make them question your feelings for them.

And this is exactly how I’ve been feeling for a while now. This is exactly how your behavior has made me feel.

Yes, you’re the type of person who wants to be pursued. You’re the type of person who wants to be begged for attention and love.

Being in a relationship with you is being high on the warmth of your attention one minute and being frozen out and left wondering what happened the next. It’s feeling grateful for having such a kind, compassionate, loving person in my life one moment and wondering whether I made the right choice the next.

But, you know what?

I’m tired. I’m tired of playing games. I’m tired of allowing you to mess with my heart and my mind. I’m tired of you playing hot and cold all the time.

I need more from you than just grandiose promises and great stories. I need more than, “Let faith directs the course of our relationship.” Or “Honey, aren’t you happy with the way things are between us now?” Because no, I am not.

I’m not happy with the way our relationship is now. I’m just tired of hearing your excuses and false promises. I’m tired of waiting for you to decide what direction our relationship should take.

I’m tired of looking for answers to the questions that are constantly bombarding my mind: What if you disappoint me? What if you give up on me? What if you break my heart and shatter my dreams?

I’m tired of waiting for you to love me the way I love you.

I’m tired of waiting for you to commit to me.

I know – we can’t know what tomorrow may bring. But, I don’t want us to close our hearts to the risk of getting hurt. I don’t want us to jeopardize our relationship before it even starts to turn into something beautiful and profound. I don’t want us to lose what we have out of fear of getting hurt.

Because loving someone truly and deeply means being willing to take the risk. It means being willing to risk getting your heart broken.

I am ready to take the risk. I’m ready to let go of my fears. And the real question is: Are you willing and ready to do the same thing?

Well, my love, I truly hope you are. Since I have no intention of waiting anymore. I have waited for much longer than I should have.  

Yes, I am willing to take the risk, but I’m not willing to play your games again. I don’t want to deal with those questions and doubts again.

Therefore, my darling, if you feel about me the way I feel about you and if you want to be with me, show me that. Show me that you’re only mine. Show me that we are in this together. Show me that you love me and that you want me to always be a part of your life.